forum  lifestyle tips

virtual feeders vs feeders irl4 months

For me IRL is best, BUT what I have ran into a LOT, is online Feeders vs. IRL Feeders are different...

I can only speak for myself, but I like feeding in real life way better, and I also like forced feeding too... Hard to do online.

When I had a Online Feeder who was also giving me fast food gift cards to feed while chatting with him, when I said I needed to cut back some because of health, He up and stopped everything with me because while I was eating I slowed down on the gaining. I really did care for him and he led me to believe he cared for me... Which I was wrong...

I only truly fatten now with real life/online Feeders, no strings just that feeding, no heart strings, I cut those off... I love to eat but my belly/heart sometimes betrays me.

Same thing happened while I was dating a Feeder, He was super gong-ho about it in the beginning, but did not understand what the gaining would do and impact it would do to not only me, but the relationship as well... Thus I lost a great kinky Bf/Dom too...

virtual feeders vs feeders irl4 months

Real life feeders. No one wants that in their lives anymore. That's too dangerous. With the goal mentality feedees of today have developed. It used to be that goals weren't an issue, but now..it's like a game, the number of pounds are points and once you hit that number, you win, game over.

Goals are fine I guess, they just put a cap on the whole thing and you can always see the end in sight, that's more than a little depressing. Sure nothing lasts forever, but would you want to know where something fun ends...especially something like this?

Most of the time we don't have anything else in common besides this fetish and that's not a healthy relationship at all.

Virtual ones are the ideal for this generation and will likely be ideal for a very long time with some special exceptions.

This is no place for emotions anymore. It's more like a business than anything else. Feeders provide a service, once we're done, that's it, both parties move on.

It sounds sterile and mechanical but...that's just how it is today.

virtual feeders vs feeders irl4 months

MoomooBunnie:
I really did care for him and he led me to believe he cared for me... Which I was wrong...

I only truly fatten now with real life/online Feeders, no strings just that feeding, no heart strings, I cut those off... I love to eat but my belly/heart sometimes betrays me.

Same thing happened while I was dating a Feeder, He was super gong-ho about it in the beginning, but did not understand what the gaining would do and impact it would do to not only me, but the relationship as well... Thus I lost a great kinky Bf/Dom too...


This is super sad. Sorry to hear you've had such bad luck. Finding someone that loves you is, IMHO, more important than compatible kinks.

Just remember that even cut heartstrings can be mended. You just need the right knots.

virtual feeders vs feeders irl4 months

BBWcreator82:
Real life feeders. No one wants that in their lives anymore. That's too dangerous. With the goal mentality feedees of today have developed. It used to be that goals weren't an issue, but now..it's like a game, the number of pounds are points and once you hit that number, you win, game over.

Goals are fine I guess, they just put a cap on the whole thing and you can always see the end in sight, that's more than a little depressing. Sure nothing lasts forever, but would you want to know where something fun ends...especially something like this?

Most of the time we don't have anything else in common besides this fetish and that's not a healthy relationship at all.

Virtual ones are the ideal for this generation and will likely be ideal for a very long time with some special exceptions.

This is no place for emotions anymore. It's more like a business than anything else. Feeders provide a service, once we're done, that's it, both parties move on.

It sounds sterile and mechanical but...that's just how it is today.


i had a lot of emotions with my Feeders but sadly when They kept putting numbers on me, and i said i like the process more then hitting the goal number, They pulled away... That is why i stopped having emotional D/s Feeder/Feedee relationships... i was always left, because i did not want to put a numbered goal, or like when i had to stop feeding so much due to a health reason. it wasn't me that wanted it to stop...

virtual feeders vs feeders irl4 months

MoomooBunnie:

SnM4BDSMinFL:
This is super sad. Sorry to hear you've had such bad luck. Finding someone that loves you is, IMHO, more important than compatible kinks.

Just remember that even cut heartstrings can be mended. You just need the right knots.


very true but truly finding it, in real life is most likely not probable... ive been a submissive/pet since i was 17, and i always did everything with heart and after those relationships which were D/s Feeder/feedee based. it hurt badly, and so i just switched to D/s without Feeding. most of my Owners were FAs at least.

virtual feeders vs feeders irl4 months


MoomooBunnie:
i had a lot of emotions with my Feeders but sadly when They kept putting numbers on me, and i said i like the process more then hitting the goal number, They pulled away... That is why i stopped having emotional D/s Feeder/Feedee relationships... i was always left, because i did not want to put a numbered goal, or like when i had to stop feeding so much due to a health reason. it wasn't me that wanted it to stop...


Sorry to hear you felt more like a number or statistic than a person. That's one reason I like irl feeding is you can just enjoy what feels good rather than arbitrary goals.

virtual feeders vs feeders irl4 months

ElkBees:
Agreed, and I'm truly sorry that happened. However, I hope that you are able to mend your heart like SnM4BDSMinFL suggested, and find someone that reignites your emotional connection in relation to this, since feedism can be a wonderful and very 'fulfilling' lol. All jokes aside, thanks for sharing your viewpoint and being open and honest about your personal experience. In this same vein of thought I wonder if being an online feeder makes it easier or harder on feeder/feedee dynamic


thank You Elk,
i still haven't been in a Feeding relationship since then, but eat off and on to gain and just to feed again, but its just been by myself. for me the online was hard, because it was frustrating because i love being physically fed (and pushed more) and always get sexually aroused when being pushed/fed/force fed, which normally leads to sexual activities, and You just don't get that with online, 1 is still the loneliest number when feeding...

virtual feeders vs feeders irl4 months

MoomooBunnie:
very true but truly finding it, in real life is most likely not probable... ive been a submissive/pet since i was 17, and i always did everything with heart and after those relationships which were D/s Feeder/feedee based. it hurt badly, and so i just switched to D/s without Feeding. most of my Owners were FAs at least.


I was very lucky to find a girl open to both. She had no previous experience so it has been slow going. It was tough going all through college and beyond until I finally met someone interested in my kinks who wasn't hundreds of miles away.

The feeding for us has been relatively minor since we aren't focused on serious gaining right now. The D/s is the bigger thing for us but she is eager to find another girl to join us for kink and feeding. I feel very lucky but finding girls who will share is tough.

virtual feeders vs feeders irl4 months

ElkBees:
So, I wanted to know people's opinions about the differences of being an online feeder vs a feeder in real life. My version of online feederism deals with encouraging with feedees or gainers (others as well) who are single or in a open relationship to gain in a no strings attached, flirty and fun, non-sexual, supportive, open-minded friendship. I wasn't sure how common this way of thinking was and would like to know if anyone else shares this same mindset or would be willing to give their opinion on the matter


That's pretty much how friendships were on Feabie. Lol I enjoyed it very much!

virtual feeders vs feeders irl4 months

Unfortunately I've never experienced being a feedee in real smiley I would have liked that lol. But I have a gf now who is small and not into plus-size related stuff or into me spoiling her or vise-versa to me. & I'm fine with that because I love her. So I guess I'll never find out what it's like lol! smiley

Pertaining to people who put numbers & goals. Yeah I've seen those people. Hasn't everyone? Daily shakes & measuring tapes, but not much affection? I believe creeps like that are in every community, like the guys that love size zeros with plastic surgery enlargements that are ridiculous.