chapter 1

I stepped on a scale. I had to crane my neck just slightly in order to see the numbers on the scale over the curve of my belly. "Yep, it has happened at last." It was destined to come and now... Now the time has finally come apparently. I've been dancing around it, nearing to that significant point, for a while. Today is the day, I'm officially two hundred pounds. For some people, most girls I know, it would be a reason to freak out, but not for me. After all I accepted my fate long ago. It would be stupid not to, I knew myself too well for that. I was a glutton and I wasn't ashamed to admit it. And if it meant I would have to carry around a bit of a belly, so be it. My soft, round and squishy tummy, that seemed to steal almost every extra pound for itself, was here to stay and I was cool with it. I'd even go so far and say that it looked sexy and sometimes at night I couldn't keep my hands of it.

I started getting fat, because let's face it, 200 means pretty fat, about five years ago. My parents were getting divorced back then and as an only child with no one to turn to I took it pretty badly. I started to seek comfort in food, which obviously resulted in couple extra pounds. At the time I didn't quite achieve as much of self-acceptance as I have now and was pretty bummed about it. My classmates weren't really the most compassionate and mocked me because of those extra few pounds without showing any sign of mercy. I've never really understood why people do it. Does it make them feel better about themselves? Do they get pleasure from seeing their peers broke into tears? Anyway... It only sent me to look for joy hidden in a carton of ice-cream. Back then however I was more determined to stay slim and so I tried to burn off the extra calories. Because of that the damage to my body turned up a lot smaller than it could have been.

It took me a couple of months before I finally realized how much I actually enjoyed eating. I wasn't resisting the urge to eat, never denying myself anything, but I did spend plenty of time exercising. For a long time I was trying to balance the larger income of calories with burned off calories, but I was failing. A pound here and another there... Eventually I gave up. Why would I kept torturing myself to stay thin, if it didn't even work that well? It was only prolonging the inevitable.

A knock on the bathroom door brought me back into present. "Hurry up! You're gonna be late!" My mother's high pitched voice sounded clearly through the door.
"Give me a second, I'll be right there!" I shouted in annoyance. "I can't even have moment for myself..." I mumbled under my breath.
Today was the first day of my last year of high school. And there I stood in all of my two hundred pound glory, clad in my tighter-than-I-remembered clothes. My belly strained the top as it stuck out farther than my B-cups filling breasts. I struggled to button my jeans, having to suck in my stomach with all of my might, before finally succeeding. The time to go shopping was looming closer as the pants gave me a solid muffin top. I tied my long blonde hair into a ponytail and swaying my curvy hips from side to side, I walked out of the bathroom.

The wonderful aroma of frying butter filled my nostrils and I followed it into the kitchen without hesitation. In the kitchen I was greeted with a plate of pancakes stacked up high just waiting to be devoured. I landed my lovely shaped bottom upon the chair, filling its seat nicely, and without further ado I drowned the pancakes in syrup.
"Is that going to be enough, Liz? I can always make you more pancakes."
I looked at the mountain of pancakes before nodding. "I'm sure, I'll have enough." I already knew where all those pancakes will end up. I patted my evergrowing belly.
In a way my parent's divorce was the best thing that could happen to me. I know how weird it sounds, but it is how it is. Officially I lived with my mom, but since my dad lived less than 15 minutes away, I spent pretty much the same amount of time with both of them. And they were pampering me beyond measure. They did whatever they thought could to sway me to their side. I was sure I would have heard by now about how bad my eating habits were otherwise.

Making my way through the massive breakfast I thought about how great it was that Kurt, my mom's boyfriend, has already left. Kurt was... not very handsome, nor was he rich. He frowned all the time, disgruntled and I wasn't sure if I ever saw him smile. I honestly didn't know what mom saw in him. Sometimes I wondered if the only reason she got together with him was because she was too afraid to end up alone. I knew that with her great looks, her wide feminine hips that I inherited and the above average bosom that I unfortunately wasn't blessed with, mom could definitely find someone much, much better.

I let out a long, satisfied sigh, while rubbing the outwardly expanded stomach. The mountain was conquered and all the pancakes found their way inside my distinctive middle. The weird thing was that I could go for a bit more. Even I was occasionally surprised by my growing appetite. Although my jeans were without a doubt happy there wasn't any more, because the button groaned under the pressure as it was. It held, at least for now.
It would have been delightful if I could just waste my time between meals as I did throughout the entire summer, but I knew I had to get going. Reluctantly I rose to my full height of 5 and half feet and headed out of the intimacy of my mother's apartment.

I didn't have many friends, but it didn't bother me. Going out wasn't really my idea of having fun, I much rather stayed at home, playing video games or watching movies while snacking intensely. The one close friend I did have was Becca. Three years ago, when we first met, we didn't become instant friends, but since neither of us really fitted with the rest of our classmates, we were sort of pushed together. As unwilling as we were at first, it only made sense, for obvious outsiders like us, to stick together rather than drift through the high school jungle on our own. It came as a pleasant surprise when we found out how much we had in common.