Chapter 1 - my infidelity

My head was pounding. My cellphone buzzed again and I saw the word "HOME" light up on it. I cannot answer it now. I had turned it off earlier, and when I turned it on a few minutes ago, I saw that there were many, many recent calls from home.

I laid in a lumpy bed in a downtown hotel looking through sore teary eyes at the cheap paintings on the walls. My pillow was soaked with my tears and snot. My so-called "afternoon delight," Charlene, had just left to go home. I felt awful about what had happened. I wished I could just accept that I had a one-time fling and let it go at that.

But I couldn't.

And even if I could let it go, the real problem was my wife. She will be so mad at me, I thought.

I had to tell my wife Sylvia, I realized. It was already dark outside, and I was supposed to have been home hours ago. Sylvia is so jealous. She will know what I have done. I was scared of what she would do to me, but I had to tell her.

The 10 months since we got married had not been easy for me, especially because my wife was so suspicious all the time. Sylvia's first marriage was to a philandering no-gooder, and as a result, she has always been determined not to let it happen again. And certainly I did not want this to happen either. It just did, and I felt horrible about it.

So she kept a tight rein on me. She knew she had to. All day, at my work as a studio photographer, I encountered beautiful women - young sexy teens, prom queens, hot college students, even MILFs bringing in their toddlers for a photograph session.

I won't brag, but Sylvia's concern was that women are attracted to me - and they are -- well, maybe not now, but that's what this story is all about, I suppose.

In any event, I had long known how easy it was for me to flirt, and I had used that skill to my advantage to attract Sylvia when we first met.

And women found me charming as well as cute. I am a nice guy, after all. And it didn't hurt that I was often compared to a young George Clooney - before he let himself go and get grey and wrinkly.

My longish soft brown hair, my lips, my muscular slender build, my firm baritone voice all seemed to make some women warm up to me easily. Not to mention what Sylvia used to call my "bedroom eyes." Oh, she enjoyed those "bedroom eyes" when we first met. But no longer.

Sylvia kept me on a short leash. Did I say that already? No, I said "tight rein on me". Same difference, I suppose. It's funny there are so many metaphors for her kind of wifely behavior. She had every reason to expect fidelity from her spouse, but sometimes this monogamous life seemed so constricting to me.

She wanted me to save those bedroom eyes for her only, but I couldn't help how handsome I am any more than an ugly person can't help how hideous they are. I couldn't help that I naturally smiled a lot and was friendly to strangers -- especially attractive women. It was just a part of my nature.

I knew that women lusted after me. It was not something I welcomed now that I was married, I assure you. And besides, this was just supposed to be one harmless drink at the neighborhood bar with my last appointment of the day - a young hot thing named Charlene.

I got out of the bed and picked up my clothing. I noticed that my shirt had lipstick stains and smelled like cigarette smoke and alcohol from the bar where that one little drink turned into many, dulling my sense of right and wrong, making me want to take Charlene to bed. Oh, why did I even go into that bar instead of going home immediately!

Sylvia will not like this one bit, I thought. As I drove home, I prayed that she would forgive me. I considered just continuing driving and never going home. But I did want to make my marriage with Sylvia work. In spite of her controlling ways, I loved her.

I saw her SUV in the double-car garage as I parked my car beside it. I took a deep breath and entered the front door.

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(AUTHOR'S NOTE: Inspired by and adapted from an old Maxout story, "Sarah's Betrayal", in which a cheating woman is fattened by her boyfriend. Maxout gave me permission to adapt and publish this.)