Extreme obesity

Do feeders ever feel guilty??

I've never truly been in a feeder relationship with someone sadly, but I could see myself feeling guilty/worrisome every once in great awhile with someone I care about.

However, as long as they're perfectly fine with it, happy, and understand the possible risks, that would probably pass and I would be supportive/encourageful! smiley
7 years

Do feeders ever feel guilty??

BALDRICK:
No, because I would want my partner to be 100% with me and up for it.


If your partner was willing, would you help them achieve thier dream of being extremely fat?
7 years

Do feeders ever feel guilty??

Well, I am a feedee and have gained 100 pounds or so from my low adult weight. I monitor my blood work and in my most recent test, my glucose levels have edged above 100, which is a warning sign for pre-diabetes. So even though I would love to put on more weight, I'm going to reduce carbs in my diet and see if the glucose levels normalize.
7 years

Do feeders ever feel guilty??

I feel extremely guilty! And extremely glad that my bf/feedee wants to stop gaining when he gets to 300 lbs (a relatively slim BHM size) and that he wants to be fit and fat. I used to weigh 297 lbs, and I couldn't handle the health problems. Even though I have slimmed down to 180-something, the aches and pains are still so bad that I am planning a religious pilgrimage that involves a 70-mile trek across Germany. (Google annual pilgrimage Our Lady of Altotting; the cathedral is full of canes and crutches left behind by people who were miraculously healed!) I refuse to fatten a partner to more than 365 lbs; if Alex decides he wants to be immobile, we may end up as platonic friends who used to date, like Jerry and Elaine on "Seinfeld." I don't identify with sadistic feeders who like seeing their feedees struggle to move and breathe and develop health problems and total dependency on another person. I want to run 10 KS with Alex and smirk at all the people who wouldn't have thought that a guy who weighs 300 lbs could possibly be that fit. Alex WANTS to be fattened; I never tried to fatten my ex, who was not a feedee and hated being fat. (Although I definitely thought about it--a lot.) Being a Christian makes it even harder--gluttony is a sin, premarital sex is a sin, "Have you ever actually Sat down and read (the Bible)? Technically, we're not allowed to go to the bathroom!"--Rev. Lovejoy, "The Simpsons," LOL.
7 years

Do feeders ever feel guilty??

I can certainly imagine scenarios where I would.

E.g. say I coaxed her into gaining, and she ended up getting bigger than she liked and couldn't lose the weight. Even if she had made the choice to gain herself and had accepted the risk, I'd feel guilty.
7 years

Do feeders ever feel guilty??

Brimstone:
Guilt is such a funny thing- I have been on several sides of this metaphorical fence, and it's really neat to see a variety of answers from many users here as far as things that we all seem to feel concern over ( a partner's wellbeing, what our partners want, etc.); I find when I have an actual romantic attachment to someone, I have a hard time sitting by as they discuss how they might want to lose weight, or how they dislike their body, etc. - I am incredibly supportive, very caring as an individual outside of any relationship setting, and for me the dilemma becomes what I want to say, which is "No"/"You're not doing that", and what I need to say as a supportive friend who wants her partner to be happy. It's caused me a fair amount of distress in the past, but for me the gratification comes out of a sadistic paraphilia - so in essence, the exertion, physical pain, and negative consequences & daily struggling are the main components to sexual gratification for myself personally LOL.

And the nature obviously of a paraphilia is that there is either distress caused by the atypical sexual ideation due to social stigma, personal conflict, or the distress of others - to which I definitely fall into the diagnostic criteria lol. When I don't have the friendship association or, "relationship" quotient with someone I am taken with, or if they are genuinely masochistic and love all of the exact same aspects of their weight gain and subsequent suffering or difficulty as I do, I don't care at all LOL. It's a bit of a slippery slope, however - and I'm a psychosexual weirdo/total predator for the willingly defenceless lmao. But I guess I can turn it off, can't turn it off, live with it, and also do all of the above at once?

I'm rambling lol ! I'll shut up now.

aho:
THIS. I care about my partner's health because I romantically love him and want to spend my life with him (I don't want him to die an early death). He also cares about his heath and I respect that.
I feel though, if I began a relationship hypothetically with a feedee that truly wanted to gain to a much higher weight with higher health consequences and they didn't care, or if I had a sexual and non romantic relationship with a feedee, I would definitely enjoy the sadistic aspects of them struggling to catch their breath, workout, fit in clothes, etc.
I'll fantasize about my partner being 600 pounds but because I respect his boundaries and love him by my side, I'll settle for slightly chubby and use my imagination for the rest haha.
The struggle of being a ffa.


I love Dan Savage's take on this:
thestranger.com/seattle/SavageLove

Also, inspired by that woman, I wrote a story about the consequences of this thinking (not something everyone here will agree with):

"Natalie and Her Dilemma"
fantasyfeeder.com/stories/view

These kind of moral/ethical issues keep life interesting.
7 years

Do feeders ever feel guilty??

ahots:
I feel that in life I am either very sexually satisfied and living with guilt, or not sexually satisfied at all, but no guilt. I can't really win so my partner and I are trying to find an in between.

Petty9x:
I think there are ways to handle it, maybe every year a "loosing weight" session or sth like that. And: There are big, healthy and fit people out there. You can gain and stay fit with swimming, cycling, things like that. You can help his body with special tees to handle the sideeffects. And maybe here are people with "real" experinces about that.

exactly i would love phases of gaining and dping more fitness again and get back in shape and do thesexy fattening again
that would be ultimately hot
6 years
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