General

Feederism identity and attraction

flingbing1819:
I have been thinking recently about my personal dichotomous feelings about what is attractive: I think that big, round bellies on other people is the sexiest thing possible, however only find myself attractive when I am losing weight. For a very long time I believed that I was /attracted/ to both body types (very fat people and unhealthily skinny people), but after developing an eating disorder, realized that I am *attracted* to fat people, but want to *be* a 'skinny person'; I don't actually find unnaturally thin people sexually arousing, but I do find them... beautiful.
I understand the concept of mutual gainers, but I now and curious about if people who fall on either the 'feedee' or 'feeder' side have the same opposing beliefs on what is attractive on others and on them, and why. To people on either side, is all fat attractive? Is it only attractive on yourself or others?


What the heart wants, we can do little about.

I think that we all have a wider range of attraction than what we give ourselves credit for. I know, for myself, that my longest and most fulfilling relationships have often been based on much more than physical features.

The ability to laugh with someone is sexy as hell.
The ability to talk for hours about all kinds of things is sexy as hell.
The ability to just be silent with someone -- and really feel together -- is sexy as hell.

Oh well, I feel I'm going off topic, but bottom line: I think everyone should give themselves permission to expand their preferences.
6 years

Feederism identity and attraction

Some men may prefer the anorexic type female, but most guys like "normal" to chubby women with a great many preferring the absolutely massive. I think just as the supermodels are an aberration so is the idea that most men are into supermodel types. I, for one, prefer to have something to hang on to!
6 years

Feederism identity and attraction

Trina:
I go crazy with this.
When I was 120 pounds, I didn't think I was sexy, yet I was almost afraid of gaining weight because I was society's ideal. I am way turned on being a fat girl, but get down on myself if I'm with someone who isn't into it, even if they don't complain I'll sometimes wish I was like, anorexic just to make them happy. If it was up to me I'd just be with a feeder and get fatter and love every second of it, never wanting to be thin. . But without the feeder, I get a little too self conscious sometimes.
Other girls, omg.. love all of them, but especially chubby to obese.
Men usually I prefer thin, even scrawny, or muscular. Some rare exceptions of course


It sounds like you have a strong need to please your partner and/or gain their approval. We all do to some extent, some more than others, so it's not a bad thing at all. You also want to be true to yourself and enjoy what you like, so if that is the opposite of what your partner wants, stress and anxiety are the result. You need a partner who wants for you, the same as what you want for yourself, so you can please yourself and him at the same time. That would be a win-win. 🙂
6 years

Feederism identity and attraction

I find gaining women attractive, but I don't want to gain. I find fat very feminine, and I don't want to be feminine. Also I am older, have HBP and diabetes, so I couldn't gain anyway. If anyone is going to gain, they should do it young.
6 years