It was gradual for me. I always liked chubby and gaining women, and meanwhile I was always obsessing about my own fitness. At some point I let go a bit and gained 40 lbs... I definitely enjoyed it but got embarrassed and lost it all. I repeated that a few more times and realized that most people didnt care. Eventially I just went all in and gained another 40 lbs on purpose, on top of the other 40. So liberating, fun, and indulgent. My weight still fluctuates but I will never be thin again, and eventually I hope to get past my mental block of going over 250 lbs.
8 years