General

........or do chubby/fat guys get effed in life, errrr not effed?



Im a larger guy who does prefer a larger girl but I could like any girl who had the right personality and was enjoyable to be around whether they are skinny, athletic, average, chubby or fat. But it seems like all girls only want skinny or muscular guys. If you look around craigslist personals(i know im a loser for doing that) every single girl says she is fat or chubby, then she says "i only want a skinny, muscular guy". Its every single one. Heck i looked on here at the personals and most are that way. Seems like everything is a little one sided.

/rant

Sorry just had to let that out

Usually I really dont care, i was just having a bad day lol

heck when its your 21st bday and youve never had a gf its almost impossible to feel very good about yourself. But ill be over it by tomorrow, I just need the 118° weather to go away so i can go outside and work on my crawler

I like all this deep stuff and agree with Ninjabread Girl. I therefore, consider my children very lucky. A good sense of humour is paramount too though.

Wow.. lots of deep and thoughtful replies to this already.

I do sympathise Jake, and have felt the same on occassion. But as others here have said, personality counts for so much, just keep positive

You've already taken a positive step by joining a fat positive community like this one, so who knows what might be around the corner

Looking at the personals here, there are quite a few girls with no weight or high weight preference.. so stick at it!

On a related note (and somewhat tongue in cheek - I hope not to offend), if you were actually interested in losing weight maybe a feedee girl would interesting in helping you by eating your food for you. As they got bigger, you'd get trimmer and it's kind of win win - hehe

Just finished reading this and it sounds interesting. Ninja you say the mothers have the ability to "warp" a child's personality, exactly what do you mean? Like giving them psychological issues? You think that perhaps it's always the father that bestows upon young men their sense of masculinity? Or perhaps do men garner it more from doing activities together considered more masculine? That thought has always made me curious. I never really had the greatest relationship with either my real Dad or Stepdad but still the same, I'd say I participated and enjoyed all the normal activities guys enjoyed in their youth. However I can definitely see the need of one needing to pull away from one's mother. I love my Mom but she definitely was waaay overprotective of me even into adulthood. I suppose if one can even see it then it must be bad.

Biggjake I think Ninja nailed it. Just be confident and I'm sure you'll do fine. I don't know what everyone else thought but from looking at the number of females who claim to be feeders in the profiles area I don't buy the notion there is an intrinsic lack of FFAs. I've come across several dozen on the site. But yes confidence is key.

For most of their history community like Fat Acceptance, Fat Admiration and Feminism have been very apathetic of the experiences and issues of fat men.

Even today on the online fat communities you will find more people down playing fat male issues than people giving support to fat men.

Things are slow to change

William

I think that women get the extremes on both ends of the spectrum. If they are what society approves of they get more positive attention than men. If they are what society does not approve they get more negative attention than men.

What seems to get lost in Fat Acceptance is the fact that fat men do experience a good deal of fat bias

Stereotypes are never very helpful.

I think the first part is a given- most guys prefer skinny (or at least non-obese women) Why would big guys be any different. Most guys are not heavy because they work up one day and thought heavy people look better and thus decided to gain weight. With respect to an above poster, this is not like "hard core christians." Most people are devoted to the church because they believe in their religion, and thus it is far more likely they want to surround themselves with others of their faith. This is more like being Jewish- It's somethign you are, and usually didn't decide to be, and it may or may not be a basis for a shared experience with others.

As to how guys treat you, I agree its improper to send (or request) unsolicited sexual photos, unless you know the person well, but other then that are you suprised? This board has a very sexual bent, and you are an attractive girl who posts topless photos of herself. Yes, guys who see your pic are going to try to hook up with you. Guys who find you interesting are going to want to hook up with you after seeing your pics. Guys who don't find you atractive probally either don't like fat girls, don't like girls, are committed to someone else, or are pedophiles.

Oh, yeah, guys are going to get off on hot girls, and most guys drawn to this board are going to think you are hot.

It's you job (if you wish) to let the guys know that sexual advances are unwanted.

I work for an employier that has very little tolerance for gender discrimination, and even our Lesbian, ultra-leftwing feminist, Hilary Clinton was the second comming of christ whose only sin was her husband, kissing your wife in the parking lot is grounds for disiplanary action, with a masters of women studies-director of diversity isn't going to suggest that men stop comming on to women they find atractive.

All I ask in tribute to this insight is higher rez copies of the pics you posted so I can get off.

Although I'm not sure this will be true for all situations, i do believe that women have to fight harder for their position in the world.

back to the original topic:
Personally i think there are several things of importance that one looks for in a (not necessary monogamous) relationship. These are

Power/Money
Physique/Attractiveness
Personality/status
related Fetish

And the importance of these varies from person to person. If you don't fall into any of these categories for another person then your out of luck.
Guys will more often seek a partner that they find physically attractive or matches their fetish, while women are more attracted to personality and or power. But this will vary from person to person of course

These factors determine how good some one is on the 'market'. And if you don't have market value, well who said life is fair. The key point is knowing what your value is, and how it relates to what others want.

And in this point if your a fat guy and no one that is on the market has a high value for fat guys, then yes, you're effectively screwed.