General

hahahha mine is the bloody nokia ring tone

When not in the Holiday mode this is what my ringtones are:

Random callers get Fortune Son by CCR.

Friends get the Fellowship theme from Lord of the Rings OR With a Little Help from My Friends by The Beatles.

Family gets the theme from Star Trek: TNG.

My text message tone is the theme for Isengard from Lord of the Rings.

It's an ongoing joke amongst my friends that when I get a text someone is taking the hobbits to Isengard....

When someone rings, my phone pulses with the Aperture Science Portal gun (blue) SFX.

Back in Black - ACDC

My ringrone is the 'Bargearse' theme tune (gotta love aussie comedies from yesteryear)
You might have to skip to 25seconds in in you want to hear it.
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As for my message tone, well to annoy people, it's a dial up modem sound, connecting to the www.

Well when someone calls me it's Jack Sparrow by The Lonely Island. But when I get a text it's the theme song from House.

I got two...

Ren and stimpy theme song, and the imperial march when my dad calls...

Mostly joke quotes, like from the Simpsons or family guy or South Park. lol Really anything that’s funny.

Karen O and Trent Reznor's cover of Led Zeppelin's Immigrant Song from The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo soundtrack. For a long time before that it was Twisted Nerve (the whistling from Kill Bill).