For many, Feedism is a kink that is an enjoyable addition to more commonplace sexual activities, but not necessary in order to achieve a satisfying sex life. For others, it is more akin to a sexuality. In fact I'd go further; I'd say that for some, Feedism is their sexuality. When this is the case, there does need to be an element of it during sex for the Feedist partner to be turned on.
The first and most important piece of advice I have is to be extremely sensitive about the subject. This is an unusual kink/sexuality that those of us who have it did not choose. We are the way we are and there's nothing we can do about it. It's generally poorly understood by those outside of our small (!) community and therefore viewed with scorn, suspicion and ridicule.
In sharing his sexuality/kink with you, he's given you something extremely precious. He's entrusted you with something that has the potential to undermine him. One of the best things you can do (if you haven't already) is to try to talk openly about it. Try to get to know more about how he feels, his thoughts and fantasies. While you're not into Feedism yourself, you may find that as you discuss it, the idea of role playing some fantasies for him becomes much less threatening to you (and, very possibly, extremely enjoyable!)
But do be aware that weight loss may be devastating for him. I've been through it myself and read what must amount to hundreds of accounts online of others who've had their partner lose weight. In almost every case, the feeder supports their partner because it's the decent thing to do, but it's shattering and will almost certainly have an impact on sex.
I really admire you for coming into our community in order to learn about your boyfriend's sexuality. To an outsider, I've no doubt websites such as this feel very alien. Rest assured that most of us are decent, ordinary folks who are very happy to talk and give advice.
7 years
