Gonna echo what others have said here, the file sucks.

The voice sounds like a guy trying to talk like a woman, and it probably is. It's just too creepy to have any effect.

I put on 10-15 pounds recently, and as such kind of want to take a step back and maintain my current weight before gaining anymore.

And yet, I feel the need to have a sizable dessert and "dozens" of ounces of chocolate milk each night before bed.

(By dozens, I mean anywhere from three to six 14 ounce servings - approximately 400 calories each... so probably a days worth of calories on average right before bed.)

If I don't do this, I have trouble sleeping. Some can't sleep on an empty stomach. I can't sleep unless it's on a happily stuffed stomach. So there's a bit of concern that might weight might wind up soaring regardless if I'm trying to or not.

I haven't been busted yet, but I had kind of an awkward moment before...

I was on break at work, eating pizza with a couple of girls I worked with, and a guy co-worker says "you're getting fat from all that pizza".

One of the girls immediately chided him for being mean, and he shrugged and said "it's okay... he likes it when people call him fat".

There was some immediate panic, as I thought maybe he's on this site and he saw me or something, but it never came up again. As for his comments... it wasn't really mean-spirited... he is from another country and has a propensity to say some really off the wall stuff - so it was probably just a very strange coincidence.

Another possible disaster I had recently... I had a binge on pizza, donuts and chocolate milk one night. The next morning, I had the trash bundled up and ready to go out on my way to work. Somehow in the process I got distracted, and realized about an hour into my shift... I left the empty pizza/donut/chocolate milk cartons right smack out in the open for my roommate to see.

Came home at the end of the day expecting awkward questions - found my roommate had decided to sleep the day away. Destroyed evidence. I was relieved, because I'm not sure how I explain eating an entire pizza, six donuts and six 14 oz bottles of chocolate milk.

When I know my roommate is not going to be home, I eat a big meal, dessert, then blend up a 3500 calorie shake and force myself to drink it through a funnel. I always make sure I destroy all evidence before drinking the shake though, as so many calories make me not want to move/do stuff/stay awake.

I wouldn't object to having a tube forcing heavy gainer shake into my mouth during sex, but worry that too thick a tube would be to fast to handle during such activity... and too thin a tube might just get clogged.

I realize some aren't really into the whole tube thing, and I'd personally balk at using a tube anywhere other than just having it in my mouth (not down my throat), but I do like how it's a fast stream of constant calories, and once you put something in the funnel, you're basically forced to drink it.

Sometimes it's a little intense, when the funnel contents seem like they're never going to run out, I start worrying I can't handle any more, but I always manage to finish anyway.

I've done a quart of half and half, which isn't too bad - but it can wreak havoc on your system the next morning.

Even a cup of heavy cream is enough to make me cringe though.

Sure about that? Jupiter would have 580 lbs up to 1470, and the Moon would take that up to 3500 or so...

Here's a game...

Go through each of the planets, and determine your weight on that planet...

- If the weight is less than your earth weight, determine how many earth pounds you would have to gain to bring your other planet weight up to your current weight. Jot down that number.

If it's more than your current weight, good. Jot down that number.

List the numbers in order.

Set deadlines to gain to those numbers. Repeat.

So if I'm 175 pounds on earth:

I would need to weigh 194 to get up to 175 on Venus.
I would need to weigh 463 to get up to 175 on Mars.
I would need to weigh 465 to get up to 175 on Mercury.
I would need to weigh 198 to get up to 175 on Uranus.
I would weigh 186 on Saturn.
I would weigh 199 on Neptune.
I would weigh 442 on Jupiter.

In theory, a feeder could trick an unsuspecting feedee into this game. "Don't worry, most of the gains are pretty small...

"Let's see... you started at... 175.... you've passed 186... 194, 198, 199... your next goal looks like... 442!"

"Wait... what?!"

"Don't worry though, it only goes up to 463 and then 465 after that."

"Yeah, but..."

"Oh, hmm... you'd need to weigh 1059 pounds to be 175 moon pounds... that's... interesting..."

Sounds awesome! Any recipes for the summer?

1. I'm pretty certain I can eat a good deal more than I used to, but probably not a huge amount. One thing I never seemed to get over is the ability to eat a lot at work. I think the stress of work and being on a limited break kind of kills my appetite.

2. Sometimes, not always. I do find that I absolutely, without question, NEED to eat before bed. Like right before bed. If I eat dinner at 8pm and go to bed at 10pm, I'll wake up in the middle of the night with terrible hunger pangs.

3. I crave things like brownies and cupcakes a lot, especially at night. Sometimes I crave blatantly fattening things like "a quart of whole milk and cake". Seems my cravings tend to be things that are soft, sweet and sit heavy in the tummy.

4. I think it depends on what it is. Chinese food, absolutely - like within an hour. Regular food, maybe an hour or two later I can eat again if I was absolutely stuffed. If I drink a cake shake or something... that tends to keep me full for quite a while. One thing I notice, the more I stuff myself at night, the more ravenous I feel the next morning.

5. It's probably habit now, but I feel the need to eat a lot pretty much every day.