Fat experiences

Friends have stated that it looked as if I had been eating well. One friend said that I seemed to be filling out. She had made a gesture with her hands to indicate an outward direction of progress. This same friend challenged me to accompany her to the gym for a workout. She explained that I couldn't keep up with her. I couldn't disagree that she could run circles around me. I'm currently not concerned. I'm considered healthy just a tad overweight.

A relevant experience reported to me:

askdrfeeder.dyndns.org/letters.html#Amanda

I usually get indirect comments, like "do you still exercise?" My parents keep saying "looks like you've put on some weight" as if to start a conversation but I just deflect and say "I guess" and start a new topic. What I really want to say is that I have been gaining weight on purpose and want to be much fatter, and it probably somehow relates to this family's obsession with weight all the time! Then go grab a huge pile of food and stuff right there. haha

Ugh. Family is kind of uncomfortable, especially with my parents, particularly my mother keeps expressing her worries about my health after having seem me pack on and gain a LOT of weight over the last few years.

Friends are a bit more understanding - there are some friends of mine who are gay and into bear culture. So, they're accepting, and helped me become comfortable with being a gainer.

Some older friends know that I've gained intentionally, though I had put on a lot of weight before they had summoned up the courage to ask about me about what I was doing to myself. They were pretty confused at how I was turned on by gaining weight at first, but understood how I saw it being like trying to be a body builder - but with fat.

My mom noticed my growing belly yesterday during the tail end of my holiday visit. I had raised my shirt briefly to pull up my belt since I wear pants a bit large for comfort's sake. She said, "Yeah, I remember when you once said you'd never get a big belly. Well, you have one now!" Mind you, she's always been a health nut and even my bowling ball of a belly makes me fat in her eyes. She loves my 312-pound fiancé quite well, though, and seems to appreciate our love isn't based on conforming to some standard of physical beauty. It's based on love and cooperation :-)

Don't let anyone tell you you're not beautiful -- because you are!

When my girlfriend started to plump up her friends and colleagues reactions have been mostly gentle and playful.

Initially it was just the usual "oh, you've filled out a bit, but it suits you very well", you know? They were showing they were noticing it. but at the same time they were reassuring there was no need to worry at all.

Then, as my girlfriend continued to plump up, her colleagues comments seemed to be a bit more amused and inquiring. They were amused because nobody was expecting to see her put much weight on (she had always been thin), and they were also curious to understand how much it was and how was it happening.

So comments like "Have you gained another bit? Looks like no more than 5 pounds, isn't it?" or "yes, working at the office does this almost to everybody.. and you're not riding your bycicle anymore by the way, probably you just need to do that and you'll slim down again."

But, since the trend didn't stop, and the initial 15 pounds gave space to 15 more the comments became a bit more explicit, also because my girlfriend had learnt to joke about it herself. So things like pinching her growing lovehandles or poking her belly roll and making some funny jokes became all but unusual. She told me one of her older colleague poked her belly and told her "wow, you've really settled well into your cubicle", while another suggested to go for shopping because her pants looked too tight.

They felt confident to comment also in front of me, always very playfully, making also my girlfriend laugh while telling me how they knew who was always ready for an extra treat at the office, and how they couldn't believe her appetite wouldn't have catch her at the end, and indeed..

Her family was much harsher initially. Instead of joking they were more saying things like "you're getting fat, you should really eat less" "you've never had so wide hips, what are you eating at home?"

But at the end they got used to their plumper girl too.

Most comments were negative from my parents and friends. Some were curious about why I was gaining. Some hurtful comments made me want to eat my comfort food. After a while, the comments stopped....especially when I got a new set of friends that accepted my fatness.

I gasped when I read that you used to be 30 pounds underweight. I'm so glad you're doing better now!

When I first started gaining it was some of my toughest years. I went from about 150 to little over 200. Everyone shared an opinion in their own way. Classmates and colleagues were little subtle " do you still run? Still Go to the gym? " that sort of thing. My friends both male and female were the opposite. I was called out more in public. "What's up with that ( pointing to my belly)". Others would loudly question whether I should " eat that " ? My family was and is still the most brutal. Between 230-260 every one accepted me as a "big guy". When I got over 300 the cycle repeated. I had some health stuff that resulted in some weight loss. Those same folks acted as if I had found Jesus and was saved. Funny how that works lol.