EmilyW:
Fattening online? Nah! I am too old fashioned for that, but you chickens, knock yourselves up. Fatten your asses online and send each other heaps of videos. That will teach those "monkey branching hypergamists" their lesson. (Yes I googled it) Haahaha.

Guess what I am holding in my hand, a nice juicy belly roll, and here, let me jiggle it a little. There, there, it creates waves like a little sea. Isn't that curious? It is so soft and squishy and it has an enormous tendency to just grow bigger every day and I only need to help it a little. Utterly fascinating our bodies are. And you can hear about it for free.

I think when COVID ends you/we need to start having serious fattening meetings IRL instead of this online nonsense.
Fuck, I am not sending any videos of me gulping down my third milkshake. I am not an Animal Planet or voyeuristic barbie. (I wanted to write whore, but luckily I didn't, coz it would be very rude and discourteous to all the barbies out there. So I just wrote "barbie". See crisis avoided with a stroke of a macbook! But it was a close one, ugh!)

Think about getting together IRL and start fattening each other's asses like a bury of rabbits (or was it a gaggle? Nah, they were probably not even rabbits fattening each other asses, so whoever is doing it then. I was sick the week when we were learning "How to fatten your friend" in school so I had to learn it all by myself. Now I am sad about lost opportunities and need 4th milkshake. You are all making me fat! It will be your fault when I have to roll down the stairs.)
Luckily my today limit for posting is probably over.