I'm going to add to an old post I made on a similar thread. I used to have terrible social anxiety, but I was able to get rid of most of it. In short, there's no big secret, it just takes a lot of practice. You'll need to have IRL conversations with people as often as possible (preferably daily), and your anxiety will slowly get less over time. Of course that means that you're going to have to push through those feelings and allow yourself to feel the fear in order to even get started. The best situation would be if you had people at work you can talk to, or if you live with family or roommates, that could also help to some extent. Here are some things that have worked for me:

- When you go shopping, you could try to make small talk with the cashier while you're being rung up. It's a short, low stakes interaction that will give you practice talking to people you don't already know.

- If you don't have friends you can easily hang out with, you can try looking for groups based on your interests that have a lot of members local to you, like board gaming groups. You can also try to make friends individually by messaging them on your social platform of choice.

- Don't hesitate to send the first message. If you understand that people enjoy having friends, then your conversation can't be an imposition. Easy conversation starters are to comment on something they posted, something in their profile, or really anything you have in common. Don't lead with something like "Hey" and wait for a response before initiating the actual conversation. A lot of people will leave you on read.

- It's better to bring up what you want from them sooner rather than later. The longer you make small talk and wait, the harder it'll become to finally cross that chasm. Plus, people generally want to know your intentions upfront anyway. Another benefit of putting your cards on the table is that it actually saves you from negative experiences. Worst case scenario is that they think you're weird and ghost you. So what? You've barely spoken to them, so they mean nothing to you. You've just saved yourself a lot of time that would be wasted trying to make awkward conversation in order to get their approval when ultimately they wouldn't have been interested anyway. There's also many other possible reasons someone might not respond to you. They may not be looking for certain kinds of connections. They could be having a bad day from work and want to be left alone. They could be asleep, and then your message gets buried in their inbox. It could have nothing to do with you at all.

- Try to tone down your filter. If you're mentally screening everything you say to make sure it's ok first, you will end up being slow to respond and stay quiet a lot. Speaking off the cuff can be hard at first, but you can actually practice when you're alone. Pick a topic and try voicing your thoughts out loud as you're thinking them, like a stream of consciousness. Once that feels natural, you can just do the same thing whenever there's an awkward silence in the conversation. It almost doesn't matter what you say. Saying something dumb or pointless can make you seem more interesting than if you just stayed quiet.

- Fake it til you make it. Pretend that the other person is already a close friend that you've been hanging out with for years. They won't know that you're roleplaying, and will usually try to match your energy. If you do become friends, those feelings will become genuine anyway, so you won't be faking it anymore. You're not trying to act like someone you're not, you're still being yourself, but just a version of yourself in a better headspace.

- Remember that being a "good listener" doesn't mean being passive in the conversation. Whenever they tell you something, you should try to relate it to your own experience or try to tell an anecdote or something. Try to avoid just asking one question after another, since that can feel like an interview. While people like talking about themselves, they like finding common ground even more.

- Eye contact used to be hard for me, but if you feel like you need to look away too much, you can just stare at their forehead instead. They can't actually tell the difference.

- Remember that none of this actually matters in the grand scheme of things. The world has almost 8 billion people scratching around in the dark, trying to make sense out of chaos, but nobody actually has it figured out any better than you do. There's no excuse for not pursuing the things that make you feel fulfilled.

The process goes like this: some fat acceptance advocates who are pretty radical about it post their wild hot takes to Tiktok. They are a small fringe minority within the community, and I think most people here would disagree with a lot of their opinions. People on the cultural right discover these videos and make reaction videos out of them, painting them as being representative of the entire movement. They're then able to lump fat acceptance in the category of "woke insanity" (despite the fact that if you've been on these boards for any length of time, you'll notice that it attracts members from across the political spectrum). The more sensational it is, the more clicks it gets. The algorithm then boosts these videos to people who are interested in any topics related to being anti-woke, and it becomes a handy source of content for them. Once the demand for reaction videos outstrips the supply of videos they would normally want to react to, they have to expand the scope of their criticism in order to keep the content flowing. They also have to continually get more extreme over time in order to retain audience attention.

This process isn't specific to fat acceptance, it's happening to every community on both sides of the aisle, and is probably one of the biggest reasons we live in such a politically polarized climate now. That being said, I've noticed there's definitely a higher level of vitriol against fat people than most other groups that get harassed on the internet. Like fat people cringe videos will go way beyond criticizing ideas and include clips of people just trying to live a normal life, or clips of them working out, like I thought the entire point was supposed to be "fAt AcCePtAnCe Is UnHeAlThY", but even when they try to lose weight it's worthy of ridicule. The truth is they just have a visceral reaction to seeing a fat person at any time, in any context, and they will rationalize any excuse they can for it to be justified.

*Checks URL*
Yep, we're on Fantasy Feeder alright. Reality Feeder is a very different website...

Before you give up on HC, you should try digestive enzymes. I have to take them myself for unrelated reasons, but here's what I've used. (Take before eating to get the best results)

Zypan by Standard Process. Has several enzymes and seems to be good at handling sugars and carbs.

Essential Enzymes by Source Naturals. Has a different list of active ingredients, and is a good all-around option.

Premier HCL (Betaine Hydrochloride). Basically boosts your stomach acid, so it's good for handling heartburn and dense foods like meat, veggies and fiber. It could be helpful after stuffings when you're taking too long to digest a huge amount of food. Probably bad for acid reflux though.

Ox Bile. This is especially good for digesting fats, so is probably the best option for handling heavy cream.

I have heard Lactaid can be very helpful with digesting dairy, although I'm not sure whether or not it's only useful for people who are lactose intolerant, or if boosting your lactase enzymes would help with digesting large quantities of dairy for someone who isn't.

Regular antacids like Tums can help soothe heartburn, not sure about acid reflux though.

One thing I've taken to help acid reflux specifically is a little bit of baking soda (about 1/2 teaspoon) mixed into water and drink it in sips. It neutralizes acids quickly because it has a base pH. Be careful not to overdo it though. Taking too much or too frequently can put you at risk for some bad side effects. It would be better to get help digesting beforehand rather than soothing it after the fact.

City Island includes a feeder as one of the main characters, and it's depicted in a positive light. It's not the main focus of the movie though, more like a side plot.

I see where you're coming from, but one thing I've noticed is that most people seem to be completely incapable of handling criticism on any level, even if it's constructive. Not just about bigotry, but pretty much anything. It's totally possible that someone starts off well-intentioned, is told that they said something offensive, and then their kneejerk reaction is to defend their honor tooth and nail against a false accusation in their eyes. I guess I see people's defensiveness as being more of a personality problem than an opinion problem if that makes sense, and I do feel more inclined to grant some leeway to someone who just put their foot in their mouth without thinking though what they said. Of course it really depends on a case by case basis and how inflammatory they become. There's also ways to bring it to their attention that are more likely to make them listen to you, like saying "Just so you're aware, there are a lot of people who are hurt when people say X because of Y reason", instead of trying to dunk on them or be sarcastic or condescending. If they still want to argue after being that nice about it, then you really do know where they stand.

Huh, you must have really misunderstood me.

I never compared myself to you, nor assumed we have a similar experience online, nor insinuated that everyone else should feel the same as me about their minority status. I don't agree with any of those statements. I don't think you should tolerate people who don't treat you like a person, in fact I said people who target and harass others deserve the response they get. My point revolved solely around false positives, i.e. people who are actually innocent of what they're being accused of. I think this might be a good illustration actually. I must have miscommunicated somewhere, because it seems like you think I'm making arguments for positions I don't actually agree with. This kind of thing can easily happen in online discussions. Plus I'm exhausted, so that may be contributing.

I'm Jewish, bi, and diagnosed on the spectrum. Yes, I've been on the receiving end of anti-Semitic and ableist comments before. It's not something I'm vocal about because I don't want it to affect how people perceive me, whether that's for better or worse.

If someone is being overtly hateful and targeting other members, then yeah, that kind of response is totally warranted. Guys like that deserve it. I do recall seeing a case like that in the past where a guy was proudly calling himself a white supremacist, and had to be removed, but in the meantime people were shutting down any conversation that started going in that direction.

The only problem I see is in the grey areas where what someone says isn't anywhere near close to that, but some people feel inclined to start dogpiling anyway because they have a personal zero tolerance policy toward anything that smells of bigotry or what they interpret as dog whistles, even if that wasn't actually the person's intent. I've personally seen quite a few cases like that happen too. I think in general it's just a good policy for people to err on the side of civility and take people at their word unless proven otherwise. Even if I strongly suspect someone is arguing in bad faith, I will usually try to give a genuine response anyway.

Ok, but you're explicitly violating TOS. What you're saying might be true for disorganized communities, but not here. This isn't society at large, and this isn't a place for internet activism. In this case, tolerance actually DOES mean tolerating the intolerant until you can get a moderator to act on your behalf. It's literally their job to do so. When you confront people, you're actually being counter-productive to what you want, because all you succeeded in doing is getting the thread closed, while they still remain a member and will continue to post. That doesn't actually scare the trolls at all. If I'm wrong in my interpretation of the rules, I'll gladly accept that correction from a moderator.

I'll edit to add an analogy. If you're part of the gaming community, and someone is acting disruptive, then yes, people should do some gatekeeping on their own. But if you're part of an after school club, and someone says something out of pocket, then by rising up and yelling at them, it only makes you look like you're just as disruptive and part of the problem. But if you turn to the club president and tell them that person is turning this into a toxic environment, then thy have an excuse to act and bar that person from future meetings.