Chapter 5 - boys will be boys

I think it's funny how guys will make fun of girls for ordering a dainty salad when they're out on a date, yet if a girl orders too much they're libel to give her a backhanded remark about how much she's eaten.

When I was in high school I was seeing a boy on and off named Ross. He was a few years older than me and went to school in Chicago, but over the breaks we'd always get together. I'll never forget when we went on our first date and I ordered a cobb salad for my meal. It may come as a surprise to many, but by no means does ordering a salad mean that it's going to be healthy. For those of you who don't know, a cobb salad usually consists of blue cheese, eggs, bacon, chicken, avocado..all sorts of fattening treats! And at this specific restaurant, they cheesed it up! Their cobb came with chunks of swiss, blue cheese and provolone, basically it was heaven in a salad. After I ordered Ross tried to make a funny remark like "oh you're such a girl ordering a salad on the first date" and it kind of offended me. Of course not enough to never see him again, but it's like, don't just assume that because I'm in this tiny body that I don't eat what I want!

Throughout our relationship I always felt the need to remain slim and not eat too much around him actually. He wasn't someone who needed a girl to be super duper physically fit, but he also didn't like a girl who was a pig. This of course always bothered me because well, I am quite the little piggy! Heh anyways, I decided that my next serious relationship was going to be with someone who I could eat whatever I wanted to around them without feeling guilty about it. And that's exactly what I did!

By the time I graduated high school, after all of my off campus lunches, drive-through trips, and just the amount of snacking I got to do out of my parents sight, I was a good 30-40 pounds heavier than I was just two years prior when I first moved to Cali.

The next part of my life that contributed to my major weight gain began when I was 18 and in my first semester of college..surprise, surprise. My roommates and I always made sure that we had our room stocked up with snacks, especially Coke and easy mac. And who always ate the most? You got it, yours truly! Sometimes I felt bad because we split purchasing the snacks and I was eating them all, but at the same time my fat ass didn't care. I'd clear out the 12 pack of coke in two days and somehow they never questioned it.

After I dropped out of that school I met a guy named Alec. Now the key to Alec was that he was a stoner who loved to eat, just like me! One of the other things I loved about him was how comfortable he made me feel about my body. I wasn't really fat, but I definitely was starting to show some curvage after my recent weight gain. He loved every inch of me. He was also one of the first guys to ever tell me that he didn't really find stereotypical skinny girls attractive. I felt like I had found the jackpot!

Since him and I were major stoners and cared more about quality weed than quality food, we were always eating fast food, and lots of it thanks to constantly getting the munchies. Once he moved closer to me and was only 10 minutes from my house, it was game over. This meant that I ended up eating most of my meals with him. Our favorite go-to munchie spots were Jack-in-the-Box and 7/11. Literally all we would do all day was sit on our butts, smoke weed, get the munchies and eat a ton of food! It was the best when my mom gave me her credit card and we'd get to order pizza. I personally love when I'm with someone who doesn't enjoy the same type of pizza as me, because that means that we each get our own! Alec and I would order a medium pizza each, wings to share, and a couple of 2 liters to go down with it all.

So to no surprise, after about a year and half of engaging in this lifestyle, I had ballooned up to 260 lbs! I had to start buying new clothes because my old ones no longer fit me properly. Plus sized clothes became my new best friend. There was simply no more trying to hide my fat.

It was the start to a big and beautiful beginning!