chapter 15

Then I discovered something entirely different on the internet! It seemed I was not the only one who liked everything fat! There was a whole community of people out there, exactly like me!
I discovered I was known as a 'gainer'. Someone who deliberately gained weight. There were feeders, who liked to watch and help someone else gain weight, but did not necessarily gain weight themselves. Feedees were those who were willing to be fed by the feeder. There were all kinds of connotations. Some feeders liked to take a dominating role with their willing submitting feedees. Others had a more mutual agreement, while some feedees felt that they were in control, ordering their feeders around, demanding to be fed.
I saw pictures and videos of gainers before, during and after their weight gain. There were videos of some gainers stuffing themselves with hideous amounts of food until they were so bloated they could barely sit up. Others would drink fizzy pop until they were ready to explode with all the gas that built up inside them. I read it was also a ruse to expand stomachs so that they would stretch and therefore eat more at the next sitting.
I must admit it was an interesting concept. One that I might try myself at some point.
The ultimate feeding experience I read about was when a feedee subjected themselves to being fed the most fattening liquids via tube inserted into their mouth. Reading about it turned me on, I had to admit, but there was no way I would ever go that far! Why would I? Doing that was like missing out the middle man. How could I enjoy all that delicious fattening liquid if it was being poured down my throat. I would not be able to taste it for one thing and that, for me was one of the major benefits.
I discovered most of the feedees were women, but not exclusively so. Many of the men that appeared were gay 'bears', but there were a few straight guys out there too.

At first, I was simply happy as an observer. I didn't subscribe. I didn't become a member of any of the sites that I visited and I didn't log on.
Then I realised that if I started participating a bit more, I could get a whole lot more out of it!
I could see more pictures, watch more videos, participate in chat rooms.
I invented a new persona for myself. I called myself 'gobble-de-gook'. At first, I just wrote a few comments in reply to what something else someone had written. I didn't post any photos. I kept my personal details to a minimum.
Then gradually, as I grew in confidence on line I participated more and read about others less. When I finally posted my start and progress pictures, they caused a sensation! I was inundated with messages from people who liked what they saw and wanted to see a whole lot more of me! They wanted to see me grow even bigger. They wanted to watch me eat. They wanted to encourage me in my efforts. They were willing to send me money, food, whatever it took to get me to be bigger and better!

I thought about it a great deal. I was not prepared to show the whole world everything about my life. I cleaned my spare room up. It already had a sofa bed in it. I transformed it into my eating studio. I added a coffee table, small dining table and chair and made sure that everywhere could be filmed on my laptop.
My first video was very short and simply showed me wearing a shirt that was far too small and my fat pushing me out of it. I didn't think anyone would watch it. It received thousands of hits in just a few days! I was overwhelmed by it's success!
I did another video of me eating a whole cake, with cream. That was even more popular!
Once I'd worked out the technical aspects of it, it was so easy to do! I didn't even have to speak!
Two months after going down to half pay, I started earning money from my pictures and videos. It was more money than I had ever earned as a personal trainer and it didn't take very much effort on my part to do.
Whenever funds were getting low, all I had to do was post a new video, or add some more pictures. Some people just liked to see my rolls of flab and how big my belly actually was. Some people liked to see me wearing the same clothes as I had in previous pictures so that they could see how much I had grown through the tightness of my clothes.
Some preferred to see me stuffed full, massaging my swollen belly. The majority probably liked to watch as I ate. They'd watch my belly grow from soft and flabby to tight and rotund as I filled it with more and more food.

In myself, I didn't care what anyone thought. They were not pushing me to do anything I did not want to do. Everything that was posted online was probably what I would be getting up to anyway.

Inthe mean time I continued to grow!