chapter 12

Big Ben's Barbeque had a range of dishes that went from heavy to insane. I had the pulled pork plate, which came with two sides, so I tried to be at least sort of low calorie and got the fried okra and the cole slaw. With all I'd eaten this weekend, it still seemed like a lot. Kelly wasn't holding back. She ordered the three meat platter and selected the brisket, the ribs and the sausage. This one came with three sides, and she had the mashed potatoes, the baked beans and the fried okra. We both had beer. Big Ben's didn't have any IPAs, but they did have a Bock that went well with barbeque.

As we ate, Kelly talked about herself a little. She'd always been a tall kid, and skinny. She'd been a tomboy, so she was always outside and active. In Junior High and High School she'd been into sports, especially basketball. With all that, she'd been able to eat whatever she wanted and not worry about her weight. In college, she'd gained the dreaded freshmen 15, but it didn't hold because she was in a lacrosse league. After college she'd taken her first job at the ad firm, and as the newbie she'd been too busy for any social life. So even though the sports came to an end, she'd been too busy to gain any weight. That brought us up to when she'd met Matt, and me, of course.

"I've never dieted in my life, Jeff," she said as she gnawed on a rib. "When Matt told me to diet and exercise, it was the first time I'd ever had to live my life that way. I'm more established now at work, so even if I hadn't met Matt, and you, I probably would have started partying more and put on some weight. If I did, maybe I would have gone on a diet or maybe not. Either way, I'm just no good at it."

"It's up to you, Kelly," I said. "I know that this is the one thing that Matt is hard over on. In fact, I'm a little surprised at his e-mail. I figured that he'd dump you then and there."

"Well, I have to be who I am," Kelly said, as she worked her way through the potatoes. "If Matt and I can work it out with me being chubby, then great. Like I said, he's a great guy. I'd just like to hear something from him other than he's going to think about it." I could tell that the uncertainty was weighing on her. I guess I felt the same way. Except I still felt guilty. Here I was, watching his girlfriend plow through a meal big enough for a longshoreman, knowing that I was going to enjoy all that plump goodness. I wondered what Matt thought of me now.

When we finished dinner, the waitress asked if we had room for dessert. Kelly ordered the bread pudding with whiskey sauce. I said I'd have a bite of hers. Kelly said I'd better hurry because she wasn't taking any prisoners.

After dessert, I was pretty full, and I could only imagine how full Kelly must have felt. We went home and Kelly checked her e-mail. Nothing from Matt. So we had a little scotch for a nightcap and called it a night. Tomorrow was a work day for both of us.

The next morning Kelly was eating a bagel with some cream cheese and drinking coffee. I had been wondering if she was going to follow up the weekend's binging with yet another massive breakfast. She must have read my mind. "No, I'm not going to gorge myself at every meal. I'll eat what I want and sometimes that'll be a big meal, and sometimes that'll be a bagel. Since I have to leave for work in," she checked her watch, "ten minutes, today it's a bagel."

That set the tone for us. We took turns cooking, and I tended toward the grill. Steaks or pork chops or chicken. Kelly tended toward the oven. Lasagna or a casserole. No diet food, but nothing overwhelming, either. At least it didn't seem overwhelming. On weekends we usually went out to eat, either one of the brewpubs or a new place we wanted to try. I didn't feel like we were overeating, but I noted that the bit of weight that Kelly had lost while Matt was home came right back, and a little more. I didn't mind, of course, but I still wondered what Matt was going to say, and when.