Chapter 4

****Laura****

This was not good, not good at all. I had successfully disposed of one cheesecake, but Alan just replaced it with another. And this one was pre-sliced. I told myself that I couldn't eat a piece because then Alan would know, but then a horribly ingenious idea came to mind one night. If I ate just a tiny sliver of each slice, I could simply push them all together a little tighter and no one would ever know. I turned into a cheesecake fiend, sneaking a bite here and there, even waking up a few times in the middle of the night and slinking down to the kitchen for "just a taste".

Now I was frantically brushing my teeth while Alan was watching TV downstairs. He had spent the past weekend baking dozens of homemade chocolate chip cookies, and the smell had driven me practically insane. To my chagrin, I lacked the will power to resist snagging one as soon as he left the kitchen for a few minutes. Since they were all kept in a cookie jar, I didn't think he'd notice one missing. Of course, over the past few days one had turned into nearly a dozen and I was hoping that brushing my teeth would get rid of my "cookie breath".

It seemed that one furtive indulgence had opened the floodgates. I had even caught myself mindlessly grabbing a handful of chocolates from one of the many dishes Alan had spread throughout the house. I knew I had to stop, but I was like a recovering junk food junkie who kept telling myself "I can quit whenever I want" while sneaking just one more cookie.

The next morning Alan had to leave for a five day trip out of town for work, not coming back until Tuesday. He was a software designer who usually worked as a consultant, and there was a big convention in Atlanta that offered the opportunity for him to drum up some new business. I often envied his ability to work from home while I put in a good 50 hours or so each week in an office environment. Working in HR at a local advertising firm was sometimes stressful, but still quite rewarding.

That evening I came home from work (stopping at the gym like usual). I planned to have a very light dinner and then go to a movie with my friend Patty, I knew I had to stay out of the house to avoid temptation. Unfortunately, two back-to-back phone calls ruined that.

"I'm so sorry," Patty said. "It's just that Dan surprised me with reservations at that nice new restaurant downtown for an early anniversary present. Maybe we can do a movie tomorrow?"

"That's fine," I said. "We'll do it some other time."

Five minutes after I hung up with Patty, Alan called from Atlanta. After he told me about his flight and we said how much we'd miss each other, he dropped this bomb on me -

"Oh yeah, you may as well toss the cheesecake, I think it's near the expiration date. Throw away the cookies too, I'm sure they'll be stale soon. I have to admit, you were right about resisting all those sweets. It's a good thing I like to bake for the fun of it, or else I might give up soon."

I licked my lips unconsciously. "Uh-huh, sure I can get rid of those. Don't worry about it."

A few minutes later our conversation ended and I walked into the kitchen as if in a trance. I grabbed a fork and a glass, then took out the gallon of whole milk (where did that come from?). I placed the cheesecake and cookies on the table and sat down, clutching the fork in one hand.

After that, things got a little blurry. The next thing I remembered clearly was sitting on the couch Sunday night, wearing only a pair of panties and an old t-shirt. The coffee table was covered with a pizza box, two empty bags of chips and an empty cookie jar. I looked down, trying to ignore the many crumbs that adorned my chest and lap. My normally flat stomach bulged out obscenely, a pale orb that obscured my view of my panties. I pulled up my t-shirt so it was fully revealed, gently pressing against my bloated middle. The skin was stretched tight, my overstuffed tummy was quite hard to the touch.

I was awash with feelings of shame and self-loathing. My vaunted self-control had cracked and crumbled, much like the dozens of cookies that I had gorged upon. My throbbing belly churned and gurgled as it struggled to cope with my gluttony. I groaned out loud as I pushed myself forward and slowly rose to my feet. After a couple belches that would make a truck driver proud, I cleaned up the worst of the mess and waddled to bed. By the time Alan got back Tuesday night I had eaten just about every pastry and piece of candy in the house, buying some on my own to replace what was eaten. My stomach was so puffy from the overindulgence that I had struggled to find a skirt that still fit.

"So good to be home," Alan said as he walked in the door and greeted me with a kiss.

I hoped he couldn't taste salt on my lips, I had stopped at a fast food restaurant instead of the gym on my way home that day. I hoped that I would be able to control myself a little better now that he was around again.

"I'm so happy you're back," I told him. "I'm so lonely when you're gone."