chapter 5: habits

A couple days had passed, and Amber was keeping up with her exercise. She had lost a couple pounds (even after having her food coma a couple days earlier), but still had a lot more to go to reach her starting weight. Since she didn’t want to just be eating at Dairy King, she had restocked her fridge and cabinets with healthy food, which kept her from eating too much while at work. She also planned on not going in on her days off to stop from eating as well. She was back on track, and feeling good again.

One thing hadn’t changed, however. She still felt hungry every day. She was able to ignore it these past few days, but instead of feeling less hungry with her lost pounds, she felt as if she was starving. She had never had to try and lose weight, and wondered if this was what it was like for anyone trying to shed some pounds away. She felt lucky she caught her weight gain early enough so that there was still time to deal with it.

With that on her mind, she heard a “PTING!” come from her bed. It was her phone; a facebook message from Sarah. Amber had befriended her a couple days ago, but she had never messaged her on messenger before. She went to her phone and checked the message.

“Hey Amber! I’m sorry, was wondering if you’d like to come in today? Stan and another person from the morning shift called off, and we need someone just in case!”

Amber felt a wave of excitement wash over her. Excited at the thought of working? Weird. Her stomach growled, but she was too focused on responding back.

“Sure! When do you need me?” She was already putting on her work uniform. It felt as if she was not in control. Her body was moving on its own.

“If you could come in now, that’d be great! If not, anytime! So long as it isn’t just before close! Lol!” Sarah replied.

“On my way!” Amber finished putting on her shirt, and bolted out the door. She wanted to run, but she didn’t want to feel sweaty when she got to work. She had gone in on her days off plenty of times, but today was different for some reason. Maybe because she said she wasn’t going to? Perhaps because they needed her there?

Her stomach growled.

Food suddenly was the only thing on her mind. She hadn’t had a burger in awhile. Oh! Fries would go good with that too. Milkshakes were an obvious thing to think of as well. She was practically drooling.

She caught herself mid thought.

“No, I’ll eat when I get home” She told herself.

She walked in to see Sarah at the counter waiting for her. She was eating a burger and sipping on a large coke.

“Yay! You’re here!” She exclaimed with a mouthful of burger in her mouth.

“Eating on the clock?” Amber giggled.

“I’m the manager, I’m allowed!” Sarah smiled back. It was true; free food was one of the benefits of becoming a manager. “But you’re in on your day off; you can have some as well.

Ambers eyes glowed. She always ate free regardless, but she would at least attempt to hide it from Sarah. Her mind was racing, but she put a stop to it.

“Oh, no. I can’t today!” Amber replied reluctantly.

“Ok, well the option’s still there! Like I said, Stan’s not here, and we need someone just in case it gets busy. Come on back”

Right! Amber forgot the main reason why she was there. Stan had called off! She had worked without Stan only a couple times, and each time it was boring. She would have to withstand Jeremy’s stares and awkward attempts at conversation. Her excitement started to wither away.

Sarah had gone back into her office; not before grabbing a few fries, leaving Amber in charge of the kitchen. She knew how to run it, but never had to do so by herself. Usually, whoever was in the kitchen with her did most of the work. Maybe that’s why she loved working so much? She didn’t really do much work. She laughed at the thought.

“Hey.” Jeremy said from the drive in window.

“Hey.” Amber said apathetically.

“Filling in for Stan?”

“Yea, had nothing else better to do.”

“True.” He spat back quickly. He stared uncomfortably at her. Amber could tell he wanted to continue the conversation, but too many years of staring at his phone and doing nothing but raid internet forums left him incapable of holding a decent conversation.

“So… guess I’ll get back to filling in then.”

“W-wait!” Jeremy said in a much louder tone than he meant to.

“Hmm?” Amber replied surprised.

“Uh, so... “ He had trouble forming his speech. “I overheard you play games… awhile ago. You and Stan talked about it. A new LAN place opened up. Want to go with me?”

Amber was shocked. Firstly at the fact that it was the most she had ever heard from Jeremy. Then, of course, that he asked her out; presumably on a date. She had no interest in him whatsoever. Not one to leave anyone hanging, she replied.

“No thanks, but thank you for the invite.”

“Don’t you have nothing else better to do?” He responded quickly, as if expecting her to say no to begin with.

“I mean, no, but I just don’t want to. Sorry” She shrugged slightly.

“But why not? It’s not like it’s a date or anything.”

“I said no; I don’t know why there needs to be a reason.” Amber said with more resistance.

“Whatever; you’ve gotten fat doing nothing here anyway.” Jeremy spun and walked back to the drive in window he had been slowly inching away from throughout their conversation.

Fat? She wasn’t fat. She had gained weight, sure, but she was losing it. “Dick” she thought to herself. She had dealt with persistent men before, but this was the icing on the cake. Jeremy popped the question right at the start of the day too, so she had to now work in the awkward environment all day. She thought about telling Sarah, but she had enough to worry about being short staffed.

It WAS an awkward shift. Jeremy definitely gave out an annoyed aura about him. Amber tried to keep busy by prepping the food for the customers. Sarah would come out to talk for a short while to help ease some of the stress, but then she’d just grab some food and then head back to her office. She’d catch Jeremy looking at her every now and then, and it made her feel even more uncomfortable. She looked at her phone to try and pass some of the time.

*New Friend Request*

Her phone showed a notification from facebook. She recognized the picture of the profile immediately. It was Stan! She felt a sudden warmth that made up for all her time being alone with Jeremy. She accepted immediately.

She spent the rest of her time on her phone; looking at his photos and viewing the things he posted. It made her like him even more. She really missed that he wasn’t there today, but the fact that he thought about her outside of work excited her.

Amber’s stomach made a lowly groan. Suddenly, she felt a fullness about her. She looked away from her phone and into her other hand; she was holding a tender. Had she been eating this whole time? She wasn’t even paying any attention. She was so concentrated on viewing his profile that she didn’t even notice that she was gorging herself. Or was she eating before when Jeremy made things uncomfortable? She wasn’t sure.

All she knew was that she was embarrassed. She wasn’t breaking out of her uniform or anything like last time, but she was trying to avoid eating so much. Still, it was an oddly comfortable feeling, even if she was uncomfortably full. Sarah popped out of her office, cutting off her train of thought.

“Closing time!” Sarah sang.

Jeremy popped off his phone and started cleaning, making sure to keep his distance from Amber. Sarah and Amber cleaned together, and before leaving, she made shakes for everyone.

“Here you go Jere-”

“Thanks.” Jeremy interrupted. He took the shake, and stormed out.

“What’s his problem?” Sarah asked confused.

“He asked me out. I said no.” Amber admitted.

“Oh, is that why it felt so awkward today? Ugh, I’m sorry. If he keeps this up, let me know. Unfortunately you can’t fire weird; and if they could, I’d be long gone!” She snorted.

“You’re not weird! But thank you! I appreciate it!”

Sarah gave Amber her milkshake, which she quickly nabbed and started sipping; despite her original shock and awe to her feeling stuffed. They both walked out of Dairy King and said their goodbyes. Amber so quickly forgot how full she felt. She was back to thinking about Stan.

She sipped her milkshake all the way home, ignoring the fact that she felt as full as she did. She didn’t know it yet, but her habit was about to grow out of control.