chapter 3 - struggling with the third challenge

High on the success and the sexual gratification from Chronic Burritos Gordito challenge I decided that round three needed to happen less than a week later. I chose Giant NY Pizza next when I checked the list and went with two roommates when one heard from the other about my spectacle at Chronic Burritos. We went in that evening and I felt ready for whatever they had for a challenge. Checking the restaurant I saw I wasn’t wrong when I guessed they’d have a food challenge. The “Yardstick” was their largest size… a 36” pie with 4 toppings and you and another three people were given 36 minutes to eat the whole thing. I slapped down the $60 it cost and got it with the four toppings being different in quarters of the pizza.

The pie took almost an hour to bake, they rolled and tossed the dough by hand, the guy who tossed it told us he had been doing it in downtown Manhattan for 12 years when he decided to move out west when his kids were born. He and an investor had put the place together after meeting him in a shop he was working at and mentioning he could toss a gigantic pizza. I asked if that was the “Douglas” who had written me that was his business partner and he happily said yes. When it finally came out I knew I was in trouble, a full yard of pizza was over 1000 square inches of bread, sauce, cheese, and toppings. I was a glutton of an impressive magnitude but this was something else. With nothing better to do and a timer running down I got to eating my massive meal. The pie was amazing! The chef wasn’t exaggerating when he said he had been doing this for more than a decade, he knew how to make a pizza. I knocked out the first quarter in rapid order but it was A LOT even for me. The dough was outstanding but very thick for the crusts and they specified you had to even eat that. 8 minutes in and I had a lot to go in on. The second half felt like my belly was just about stuffed… I was belching out gas but it didn’t feel like it made any room. The clock was at 22 minutes, 14 remaining and I realized I was cooked. I couldn’t do it on my own… my roommates having already finished theirs were hesitant but knew I NEVER shared a meal if I could avoid it and wanted to help me finish the challenge. They managed to get in about a quarter between them and I took out the remainder with just two minutes left on the clock. They ducked in on both sides of me and we all embraced for the photo. I smiled but was a bit disappointed in myself. I felt I shouldn’t have been surprised when they brought out another 8XLT shirt for me. The Buffalo Wing place had been bright yellow, Chronic Burritos was green, and now Giant NY had given me a tomato-red one. I had quite a collection of somewhat food soiled shirts going.

I had another strange dream that night, laying in bed with around 10 lbs of pizza in my belly if my bariatric scale was accurate. Weighed in at 591 Lbs of fat, skin, pizza, and maybe a bit of muscle, and bone. I had won my pizza and even managed to have a good time with my roommates stuffing themselves to help me out but I wanted to win on my terms… solo. With my CPAP on and the fans cooling my rolling hill of a body I drifted off. I was sitting on a couch.... Big as I am it was hard to tell if I was wearing anything but I could see a hint of some grey cotton shorts draping my rear even if I hadn’t been able to feel them. My stomach was groaning and I tried to stand up. My legs pulled uselessly in their attempt to lift the rest of my rear end off the seat. I rose a few inches up before collapsing again. My blubber undulated with the sudden return to the couch and I gave up,

“Babe! I’m starving….”

A moment later a man walked into the room wearing an apron and nothing else. My dream man was exactly that, my dream man! Stocky, well-built but with a little fat on him. He walked up smiling and carrying two party serving trays in each hand.

“Here you go, get comfortable piggy and dig in, no one here to judge your lack of utensils”. I oinked in obedience… and started shoving handfuls of buffalo boneless chicken pieces in with wild abandon. I couldn’t believe I’d be so lazy at first but it started to sound better and better as I ate the entire tray and moved onto a tray of pulled pork over mac and cheese. My hands were coated in BBQ sauce and cheese in equal measure and I had to suck down vast gulps of air in-between my hands shoveling in as much as I could. The shorts I couldn’t feel at first became more apparent after a while. It went from a taut pressure against some of my fat rolls but now that I was starting on the last tray it felt like it was choking me around my globular middle. Realizing I was swelling fatter with every bite and was probably closer to 700 now than even 600 if the very apparent extra few inches of neck fat filling my lower view indicated anything. The last tray was al pastor pork and I knew what I had to do… I lifted the tray with all of my strength and let it slide into my mouth as I chewed my face was slathered in melted pork fat grease and it dripped down my bare stretch mark covered chest. I felt it trickle into a few folds and it felt like ecstasy. Gulping the fatty delicious meat down I felt the seams on my shorts strain… my hips were so wide I had no idea how I was going to get up let alone walk again but it didn’t matter I needed MORE!!! Finally as I finished the tray I felt the waistband snap and the sides ripped on both sides at the same time. I was massive… a human pile of gelatin… I tried to shift myself but the weight was overwhelming… It felt like every part of me was bound to massive bags of sand… full but again wanting up from the couch I realized my predicament was all the worse than when it started. I struggled for another few moments before winding myself to the point of abandoning my effort. I lay there full, immobile and exhausted and blinked before jumping as if I had napped within a nap because my writer is horny and not good at doing this… I woke up with a feeding tube and mouth bit inserted into me and could feel the thick fluid being pumped down my throat. I was worried at first but shrugged it off as I saw “Doug” return,

“I hope you didn’t think you were done pig… now that you’re mine we’re going to make sure you can E-A-T everything I give you”.

I nodded in compliance and decided to just sit back and see if I could watch the show and boy was it good… minutes passed as I slowly inched outwards inflating. Bigger and bigger my belly climbed over the useless barrels of fat that made the top of my calves and made its way to the floor. My ass didn’t get ignored as it spread as wide as the three seat couch and started to climb over the armrests. My view was being filled almost exclusively with my pale blubber as I drifted off again and felt like this could be my future.

No more fucking around I decided while hearing my office peers drone on in my third pointless meeting the next morning. I had passed that challenge but it wasn’t going to be enough anymore to ask for help… I wanted to be able to eat the entire yardstick pizza by myself and ask for a snack to take home. After chiming in my two cents for the hour I went into amazon and delivery services and found out that meal replacement shakes got sold in a lot of varieties, while most were the diabetic ones and the slim fast chalk drinks my family tried forcing on me last Thanksgiving I struck gold; high calorie shakes for people needing to rebuild body-weight… the calorie and carbohydrate counts sounded great to me so I ordered 3 cases to see if I liked any of their flavors.

I liked them but ran into a problem… I drank the damn things too fast! I would knock out two-thirds of the 27 8oz boxes as a companion to my daily eating so I only had two days of them and one try at bloating on them at once and while it felt fantastic I needed a lot more of them. I set up a biweekly shipment of a dozen and a half cases to be supplied every other week and got to pushing myself. I stopped going out to eat after a while as half a gallon of the thick liquid of the stuff would leave my belly with 4,500 calories and I can barely eat anything on top. I needed to get my capacity expanded so at least once a day I’d drink as much as I could at a time starting with 10 boxes and every three days add another. After a while I hit a limit of 15 at a time and started making that two meals a day instead. The results spoke for themselves in increasing my capacity, on the occasional day when I didn’t have any shakes left I was ravenous… keeping my stomach well fed and never fully empty had gotten me a little addicted to eating and the heavy caloric load had been doing wonders for my waistline, I was reliably gaining a pound a day of new fat to compliment my added voracity. My clothes all strained to fit my bulk… my torso was like a beanbag of lard jutting several feet outwards and even my 8XLT shirts had begun to leave my pale belly peeking out of the bottom. I placed an order for replacement clothing a few weeks after starting my shake regimen when I was getting more confident I could take on the Yardstick on my own… there was no rush I felt but I would probably want to be able to eat the entire thing without the risk of clothing ripping off my body… a hot fantasy but even I had my limits. I found a place that offered sizes in the double digits online and placed an order, no point to get size 9XL. I figured I was too hooked that I’d be back to the store too soon… no 10XL would do me just fine I thought to myself looking at my massive paunch and thinking about how happy my new lifestyle had been making me. I ordered a few tracksuits to go out in, half a dozen tank tops for wearing under the jackets or at home when lounging and 2 polo shirts for wearing during meetings on webcam when I had to look halfway decent.

When the clothes came two weeks later I decided I was ready. My sweatpants were so loose I had to ride them high up on my gut, helpful since I had worn my Chronic Burritos shirt which was no longer fitting at all and cinched them off. I told my roommates that I wanted to hit Giant NY again and take on the Yardstick challenge solo.

“Is that what you’ve been doing for the last month man?” One of my roommates asked plunging his finger into my lower belly and seeing how far it sank in. “You look like you’ve packed on a few since we went there last… how big you gotten dude?”

“617 as of this morning”. I said patting my ponderous middle. “You know me, I like those challenges and it’s gotta just be me doing it…”

The same two agreed to come back and watch the spectacle, a few references to Mr. Crestote got thrown my way on the drive over and I loved it.

We got to Giant NY and the man behind the counter recognized me and my girth and asked why it had taken so long for me to return. I could tell he was teasing but given my already candid responses to my roommates earlier I figured I’d have more fun if I put my card on the table.

“Oh, well I really enjoyed trying to take on that yardstick challenge last time I was here and was just a bit bummed I couldn’t do it on my own” I told him.

“You’re kidding right? That pizza’s more than 10 pounds of dough alone, you’ll notice you and those two where some of the only people who could finish it together!” he replied.

“Would you be willing to bet?” I said, broadly smiling a devilish grin. The day before I had capped out at 2.8 gallons of shake in my belly… around two and a half times what I had been able to do at the start of the month and I had only had a pint all of today so I was STARVED… I was going to demolish that pizza and ask for a side salad afterwards.

“Yeah, you got it Pillsbury.” The pizza chef took my order, my card and laughed as he walked away to get it started.

The pizza came out at an achingly slow rate for someone who was as hungry and as horny as I was… the timer was started and I took off. I started out by rolling the long NY style slices from the crust towards the center… almost like an oversized pizza cannoli. My eyes twinkled. I shoved it in my mouth and had it down in four bites. I attacked the pizza with that tactic in a mechanical order, rolling up the slices with my right hand while stuffing a current one in with my left. I was eating slice after slice in an average of 45 seconds and wasn’t stopping for so much as a sip of soda. Bite after bite, I swallowed the delicious cheese, dough, sauce and whatever toppings that part had so fast my roommates had taken out their phone to record it. I had all 16 slices downed in 12 minutes, 22 seconds. I had done it, not only had I but with such intensity that it only took ⅓ of the time allotted. I was unstoppable! The chef who had come back over after a few minutes when he heard I was already halfway finished slapped my meals pay on the table. I thanked him and asked if I could order something else as I was quite happy with my meal but didn’t want to go home hungry. His eyes bulged in shock and he took my order for a family size Greek salad, calamari appetizer and eggplant parm sandwich handing him back half the cash. He took my photo, considering what I had just done he said, I deserved a second spot up on the wall on my own and I couldn’t have agreed more. I took a look at the wall and noticed someone else who seemed to have done it solo. The photo was of the man seated, he was huge like myself but in different proportions, shorter I was almost positive, around the same weight I suspected but given there was less skeleton, that meant a lot more of it was blubber. His tye-dye shirt couldn’t cover the bottom and biggest third of the massive truck tire of belly he had, that duty had been left up to sweatpants which I was jealous of the size of however his time, 30 minutes, 5 seconds wasn’t nearly as impressive as mine I wondered why I hadn’t seen his photo at the other places… guess not everyone like to do this for fun I guessed. As I was finishing up my second dinner the chef brought out another 8XLT shirt and I thanked him for it. I asked if he would like to see me in it and he chuckled and said of course so after removing my track jacket I waddled my way into the men’s room and changed from the chronic tacos to it. Also taking the chance to put the waistband of my sweatpants under my belly. Given my euphoric and painfully distended belly and the sheer blubber from the last month, my navel was even peeking out! Over half a foot of my gut now hung out of the shirt all the way down to where my belly split apart into two luscious lumps of soft blubber. Quite happy with my look I went back out and gave the owner a bear hug into my enormous chest while posing for another photo.

As we made our way out of Giant NY and loaded back into my car. I noticed a large Land Rover pull into the space next to us. The owner of Giant NY had come out and was pointing at our car to the guy who had gotten out of the Rover. They were a distance away so I wasn’t sure why but he looked familiar from somewhere…