General

Not trying to stir up issues here, but you cant blame the men.... or just blame FAs or feeders.

I recently was dumped by my ex.I don't blame all FAs, or feeders for his actions... and I knew him for like 3 years. Of course I hope some day he and I can be friends, but until then I cant place the blame on everyone else- I think you should take a little responsibility for your own actions.

Honestly you should know that not everyone on here is who they say they are. You should know that most people enjoy the fantasy side but can not commit to anything for a reason, hence why they are on here instead of feeding someone in real life.

There are real feeders out there. I was lucky enough to find one, so while I transition from a relationship ending to being a single girl again- I can count on him for support... financially, emotionally and for my sexual needs. It took me 4 years to find him, and he has outlasted 2 relationships of mine.

Takes time dudette. You can not expect someone to instantly want to drop all kinds of cash into your hands when they barely know you.

Feederism is about trust, and honesty is a huge part of that. Honesty from you and from them.

I can not tell you how many messages I get daily about how someone wants to feed me... then I lay it out and say these are my requirements- 400 bucks a month, we have to see each other face to face at least once/and once every 2 years after that, and we have to be friends no matter what happens... Normally this weeds out the fakes, and people get the idea I am not looking for a free ride/it takes time for this sort of relationship to start and develop/I am not just jacking around and saying stuff on the internet/this is my real life.

Not saying you are looking for a free ride, but you have to know what you require, and what they are capable of to begin with. Then you have to talk it out, come to agreements and sometimes surrender certain aspects of your requirements to also fit into his/her life. It is just like a real relationship- every person has to give 100% all of the time.

It just doesn't happen over night. And you should be proud that you got rid of a faker before you became dependent upon him. It isn't just your fault that it didn't work out- but you do need to take some responsibility for the fact that you seemingly didn't know him well enough- let it go, move on.

Celebrate your new steps as you are now seeking a real feeder with cake.

This is so true.
This site covers a range of people..gainers and feeders/people who are fat but not out of choice and are size positive/people who have fat fantsy fetishes etc..They are all legitimate points of view and should all be welcome.The problem comes when people who are approaching this from different perspectives interact on the internet and mis-understanding occurs.
As a general rule in life,'if something sounds too good to be true,it probably is'.Just use a bit of common sense..if someone from another country offers you everything...is that really likely to be truth or fantasy?Have a sensible internet conversation first,question all the boring,practical stuff and get their real name and details (if they are serious,they will give them to you)and then meet.Be honest from the outset with people and they won't get hurt.

There's a chance I'll go total 'dick' here but, meh....


To address this to all guy is messed up. Totally messed up. Just cause one guy will talk about making you gain just to get his jollies off, then once he's bored, just stop talking to you...does not mean all guys are like that.

How about we blame some of the women around here? How about the ones that post topless pics of their growing bodies cause they are obviously in desperate need off attention...and when given attention, they chose to blatantly ignore and write off 99% of the people.....

"Hey, she's cute and actually lives within an hour from me? I'd love to chat with her and see what she's like....*polite msg sent...6 months later* Oh well, at least sending a reply that says '*** Off' would be nice...."

I don't mean to go off but, I've been irritated with the people on this site for sometime and, I'm not even sure why I come around...probably cause some of you are quite decent and the forums are a fun place to browse around and 'chat' in....

So, maybe this guy has been lead on with the assumption that he'd be able to feed a girl, fatten a girl...live his fantasy and it's been squashed many times....I'm very sorry it happened to you but, maybe he was just doing what he learned.....


No one really knows anyone's story when it comes to online sites, chatting...etc.

I personally do not think there is anything wrong with looking for a feeder- I mean honestly if you are into gaining and becoming immobile you can not clean yourself/take care of yourself ALONE.

It does take team work, and lots of trust... then even more communication.

I understand Treasure was just letting some steam off, and I see her point- but these sorts of things- a truly great feeder/feedee relationship takes time...

You don't marry the first person you sleep with- and if you do it is because there is an understanding that more then likely you wont want to sleep with anyone else...
Just like Treasure has the right to find and secure a feeder- that feeder has the right to no longer support her.

I can not stress enough how important back up plans are... and even plan C... hell, you might as well make a plan D... see where I am going with this?

I respect and adore Treasure.
I just can not stand it when someone points a finger at a group of people because ONE bad apple lets them down.

That is just like when men on here say the girls are snobs because they don't care enough to write back- who cares? Move on... people are a-holes on the internet- just because you are open about what you like/want doesn't mean it will happen for you. Not everyone gets what they want- but don't be bitter and blame everyone because you failed to speak about requirements and/or they failed to meet them

Feeders do exist... good ones even.
Feedees are real, and some of us are pretty cool to know.
Enjoy the ride. Half the fun is getting to that point where it is a mutually beneficial relationship.

I think one of the big problems is that on this site there are a lot of people that just come here 'to get off'. And I think that when some of the guys that come here want to get off, they will say a number of things that they don't mean.

Meeting someone around the globe for example is something they would say, and maybe even do. But if the motivation is only for sex, I guess you could say that the german guy realized it would be a very expensive 'sexy time'.

I think what miss pretty panties says about how you should gain only for yourself is very true. What people do with themselves is not my concern, but you never know before hand if any relationship is going to last beyond the first meeting. So think ahead.

I do think that one of the main problems of this board is that a lot of people come here to get off. And they show no regards for others. This harms communications for people with real intentions, since their messages get lost between all the spam that is sent.

I am so sorry that happened to you.

But hopefully he reads this and sees that not everyone on the internet is a fake and that someone people get emotionally involved.
Generally a good rule to follow is- if it seems to good to be true, then it usually is.
And now you know that because of your emotional ties to eating- the fact that being fed and taken care of is a emotional thing instead of a sexual thing- this means you should always meet your feeders a few times, explain this to them and test the commitment they can do for you. Make them understand how it is affecting you, and what it is like for you.
It will take longer to find a "perfect fit" but worth it in the end- less heartache for you, and less wasted time on people who are not worthy of your time.
I have the opposite issue- eating and feederism is just sexual to me. So men/some women are more likely to give me gifts and things because there is a mutual understanding that it is mostly just sexual for me, and I don't get emotional ties about them when they buy me lunch. Not that there is anything wrong with that- everyone has a different link to food.

I really hope you take some time and let your self heal, then you can continue for your feeder prince to sweep you off your feet!

But also please please please be careful from now on.
You said- He talked me into his dream.
You need to live for you, live your dream... there is someone out there who will share your dream, I promise. Until you find him/her/them... please be careful. This is your life now.

Also I suggest you get treated for your food addiction. Then maybe you wont have such a hard time letting losers go. *hugs*

Aww come here and let me hug you, lets share ice cream!!!

Sometimes I make sense... then other times I have to let others talk sense into me... sometimes we have to hear it from someone else to really hear it, ya know?
I have been in Treasures situation before, it was not fun and I continued to be in a vicious cycle.
I really really really wish her the best. She is amazing and deserves something amazing.
We all do.

*group hugs if you like it or not!*

But there is another problem people are overlooking. It is ver dangerous for anyone to depend on another person totally, for any reason.

First of all, not all relationships work out for anyone. I think the divorce rate is something like 50%? It is impossible to get someone to guarantee they will always be there, because even if they are OK with the feeding/weight part, there may be something else that causes a break up. I don't think there is anyone here who has never been dumped in their lifetime.

And even if it is a perfect relationship, the other person can die, or become disabled himself.

In my opinion, gaining to immobility is a very risky thing.

I agree with all of that, and hence why I support and suggest a couple back up plans- just in case.

hey, pretty lady... I stalk your fetlife almost daily.
Jelly of that frilly red bikini, and your lips like whoa! Hahaha,plus you are just smart. You should be msprettysmartpanties.