General

Yes, statistics would be interesting. I have researched the subject of feederism since over 12 years and I am still trying to figure it out. I know that there are many more feeders and feedees out there that we can possibly imagine. Food and sex are nothing really strange, they are naturally connected: food is good and necessary and wonderful and the same for sex.
I think the internet has helped us a lot, but there is a factor that it helps people hide too. The majority of feeding seems to happen in peoples head and online, not in real life. Real life meetings are still hard to do, there are many fakes and people that know they will never live this out in real. For me as a feeder and feedee that has been out of the closet for many years a very frustrating fact that I have come to terms with. Eventually, feederism will be mainstream, and accepted. But currently, it is probably like the gay movement in 1955: everybody is hiding and scared to show themselves, fearing to be discriminated or marginalized for their likes.

I think that's an interesting idea, but I have to disagree that feederism is a private fetish. I'm sure it is for some, but I don't think that's the case for many others.

Feederism doesn't just exist inside relationships. In fact, I imagine that for many it only exists outside of them! I know that I first came to explore the fetish through realising that seeing women gain weight, usually celebrities or pics of random girls on the internet, turned me on. Equally, many feedees seem to find their fetish quite independently of relationships.

And in other ways, feederism is a peculiarly public fetish. Most other fetishes are confined to the bedroom, but weight gain is lived out every second of every day. Sure, people might not know that someone is gaining weight on purpose, but the effect is still there for all too see. I think this is why there is societal pressure, not because feederism is private but because it is potentially public.

I think there are two sides to this, you are both right, feederism is very private, since it is directly connected to sex (as least in my own experience and many people that I have seen), but the reason that it is private is not natural, it is because it is such a huge taboo and people are scared to do this in groups. even social. I did an experiment last year in the BBW bash, where I asked people to meet up, in a small group. Nothing strange, just talking about it, socially, no feeding or even eating involved (because I know that this is too far out) just people that are into feederism being able to see that other people into this are normal everyday people. I even offered that people could PM me, so we could meet in private, not in a group. almost 500 people read it, 1 (!!!) person responded. It was a little silly, the reaction looked like I had suggested something totally obscene.

I can remember being like this too, a long time ago, thanks to my website and the people that write me everday through it, reading my stories and the feedees I have met in real life and also fattend up, I have come out of the closet and am no longer satisfied to live this online and virtual. The internet helps big time, but it is just not real. Not real as real life. But one thing I think is great: I would not have met these people in person and been able to build long lasting friendships without the internet, since there is no way in hell, ever, that you can find out if somebody is a feeder or feedee when you have no clue if they are in real life. Asking them face to face would be the height of risky, so without hte internet, I wonder how much people would actually meet in real life. It is hard to find like minded people with the internet, without it, it would be virtually impossible. I'm trying to build up a group of people into feederism here in the San Francisco Bay area (really the totally worst area, as California is super fat averse). I see that there are groups going already in England, as FF is based in England, so it is possible.

For me feederism is a precious wonderful magical thing and I want to help feedees grow, as well as help other feeders help theirs grow, as well as be in contact with other feedees, as I am a feedee too, because we are in this all together. And if somebody grows, gets fatter, it is important that people that accept this and like it witness them. I know that if I grow, I want to be seen. Growing is just something really wonderful and it should inspire people. In a group like this, you can see that process. Knowing that somebody is a feedee, they might also feed themselves and you can see how they gain.

Well I can tell you what it was like in the 70/80's. Even the thought of going out with a person who was fat was considered a fetish. Now it seems very commonplace and hardly anything out of the ordinary. The only sign that anyone would gain weight on purpose could only be seen in porn mags and that was extreamly rare, only BUF seemed to show girls that had gained, even then it was hard to know that they did this on purpose. Come the 90's more mags catered for the BBW market and from there is gradually blossomed, but not until the internet boom did it really take off and show this was for real and for many, not just a handful.

The internet has allowed many to see that fat women, be they plus size models, or the girl next door can look as stunning as any slim girl could ever hope to look. Basically this must give women of any size more confidence that they can be fat and beautiful, whether they already are, or desire to be. That they don't need to diet and deny themselves the food they like just for the sake of beauty, or being fancied. If, as many have said they feel they are wired to be feedees/fat, then whatever their size they know/find out there are others who feel the same way, the more they feel they can submit to their desires.

Ironically though I'm not sure there has been the same development for male feedees (not being one I am just guessing), male feedees could tell me otherwise. However, as many on here have said they like the contrast and as women get fatter, do their desires for slim/athletic men get wider? (certainly not until the 80/90's were skinny men desirable, they had to have some muscle). In the 70/80's women were so much slimmer than men, whereas today there is so much pressure put on men to conform to the male ideal (ie athletic), that it seems there are more fatter women these days than fat men. In the 70's the average size woman was UK size 10/12 and a size ten was for fitting a 34-24-36 figure. Size ten is much larger now, yet the average size woman today in the UK is size 16.

All that said, the ideal for both men and women in the media is that of slim for women, slim/athletic for men. It will take many years before feeders/feedees are accepted as a norm.

As I have said in a different subject post, I personally think this latent desire is in many more people than at present we have any idea of. However, the more information that is out there to allow people to discover this desire the better.

Back in 1986 I fell in love with a 19year old girl who was 5'3 and 98lbs. I certainly knew by then that I prefered girls with more weight on them and during our four and a half year relationship she gained up to 120lbs (she had a very big appitite for her size). I found her gain very sexy and she was also happy about it too (always wanting a much curvier figure). That said she was also concerned that she shouldn't get too fat, but didn't really want to do anything about her gaining.

She was a very pretty girl looking a lot like Helen Baxendale, including the same facial expressions. As I found her very attractive I never asked her to gain, but did compliment her when she was getting curvier. At no time did any of us have any idea that there would be people that actually wanted to get fatter. back then the thought would have been alien to both of us, it was the late 80's after all. I still wonder whether she may have had a feedee mindset in her, but society's pressure would never allow her to get fat back then. However, suppose we had all the information at hand that there were people that wanted to get fat. I would have found that I certainly had feeder tendancies and she may well have been able to relax more about getting even bigger. I know she found girls with bigger figures than hers sexier than slim girls. One day she would say look at that girl, she's no lightweight, then the next see a girl that would be a simular height, but 30-40 pounds on her, say she's got a great figure. Because I was never really sure what she wanted regarding her weight we never took this to another level.

I definetly think the internet has some influence on why i even think about feederism. I had never been like maybe i want to watch a guy eat an insane amount and rub his belly for hours. I was just like fat guys are so cute. But looking it up brought feederism up and i was like ....hey thats pretty cool...really cool. I would have been none the wiser without the internet. now my profile picture is adam richman of man vs food

There was barely any culture at all before the internet. I didn't even know others like me existed until I was 30!

I guess it can be powerful that you find a lot of people that share your orientation (I don't like the word fetish really, as it does not describe feederism that well if you are really into it deep).
I constantly get a lot of mail from feedees through my site that tell me that they thought they were crazy or strange, but then found that they were not alone, that lots of people were into that.

But, with all the ease of connection, the internet makes it also easy to hide and be virtual and not real.

Hmm, but feederism must be ancient. A man cooking for his wife and fattening her up like that or a wife cooking for her man and seeing how he thrives and expands, getting fatter, this is really old.
As long as there have been cooks, there have been gourmets and show me a cook that does not enjoy his/her food to be enjoyed and cherished.

But true, it was not a phenomenon where the feeding was front center.

By the way, we got a amazing group going in the bay area, totally cool people and we had already about 6 meetings all in all.

It needs a little more regularity to become a permanent fixture, as these groups keep dying if you don't constantly schedule meetings (meetup.com is a great example of this), but we are moving in the right direction.