Gaining

That same thing happens with lots of gainers. It happened to me, at this point I don't think there is a cut-off of too fat (other than total immobility). And even then, with the right feeder/care giver I'd gladly go for it.

Part of me just wants to gain for the sake of getting fatter.

The great thing to me is the Joy you seem to be experiencing. And while you are now obese in the eyes of science- the milestones that might lie ahead by Labor Day are ones where everyone will consider you Fat. Especially 200 lbs. I'm pretty sure when you left for vacation a couple years ago that weighing 200 lbs never crossed your mind.Maybe your body will settle in soon. Or maybe not. It will certainly be interesting.