it _was_ well written but i sort of got lost in the numbers and statistics.
also i read (and write) for my arousal and arousal of any who read my work exploring the erotic sensuality of the fattened male body, so just growing fatter doesn't push any of my buttons.
however, as an example, mz jezebel's brilliant michael series, especially the latest part 16 most assuredly does, and with a vengeance.
but to each their own...write what turns you on and damn the critics :-)
btw tweaking your story's sub title will bounce yours to the top...just adding chapters does not so your story stays buried. a bad thing if you want people to read added chapters. unfortunately the feature can be misused and has been, so a caveat if we want the feature to remain .
10 years
