General

My bf is into feederism, i'm not

It seems quite common in relationships for partners to be very compatible in many aspects of their lives but not necessarily have the same kinks in the bedroom. In my own relationship my partner is more into sub/Dom and I'm more into feedism. Whilst in some ways I'd love her to be into feedism too, our differences actually make our sex lives more interesting. We both try to accommodate each other's needs and desires without one person getting more than the other and it seems to work well. I've found the she can satisfy many of my feedism needs by indulging me in fantasy and roll play. She's already a BBW and isn't sure about getting a lot larger, but she's quite happy to eat indulgently for me and being a foodie she enjoys this too. She'll also dress up and show off her big body to me which I love and discuss and role play my fat fantasies. Try chatting to your partner about his fantasies to see if you can't help full fill them In any way without you actually having to gain weight. share some of yours at the same time, it might spice things up even more.
8 years

My bf is into feederism, i'm not

He assumes you are going to change your mind and get into feederism. You assume that he is going to change his mind and stop being into feederism. I'm sorry, but this is doomed.
8 years

My bf is into feederism, i'm not

girlcrisis:
As for your boyfriend's relationship with sex and porn... I would say that sounds like a problem independent of feederism.


This too. Saying he doesn't have a sex drive and has a lowered libido when he's constantly jerking off, and how he's fine when he wasn't... him constantly jerking off is clearly consuming all of his sex drive.
8 years

My bf is into feederism, i'm not

For many, Feedism is a kink that is an enjoyable addition to more commonplace sexual activities, but not necessary in order to achieve a satisfying sex life. For others, it is more akin to a sexuality. In fact I'd go further; I'd say that for some, Feedism is their sexuality. When this is the case, there does need to be an element of it during sex for the Feedist partner to be turned on.

The first and most important piece of advice I have is to be extremely sensitive about the subject. This is an unusual kink/sexuality that those of us who have it did not choose. We are the way we are and there's nothing we can do about it. It's generally poorly understood by those outside of our small (!) community and therefore viewed with scorn, suspicion and ridicule.

In sharing his sexuality/kink with you, he's given you something extremely precious. He's entrusted you with something that has the potential to undermine him. One of the best things you can do (if you haven't already) is to try to talk openly about it. Try to get to know more about how he feels, his thoughts and fantasies. While you're not into Feedism yourself, you may find that as you discuss it, the idea of role playing some fantasies for him becomes much less threatening to you (and, very possibly, extremely enjoyable!)

But do be aware that weight loss may be devastating for him. I've been through it myself and read what must amount to hundreds of accounts online of others who've had their partner lose weight. In almost every case, the feeder supports their partner because it's the decent thing to do, but it's shattering and will almost certainly have an impact on sex.

I really admire you for coming into our community in order to learn about your boyfriend's sexuality. To an outsider, I've no doubt websites such as this feel very alien. Rest assured that most of us are decent, ordinary folks who are very happy to talk and give advice.
8 years

My bf is into feederism, i'm not

Everyone has had some really great input for the original poster.....in fact brilliant information toward this complicated fetish.

The crazy thing is with so many things it has so many varying degrees in fact the biggest one I can think of is the amount of change that has occurred within this fetish for myself.

For example many years ago I like slightly chubby girls/women that gained some weight who turned chunky or a bit heavier. Now it seems like i tend to gravitate to much heavier fatter women with much bigger thighs, butt, belly, breasts....just everything. When I was dating my wife I thought that if she just got to that chunky stage that would be so hot.....now I envision her getting to 250 Lbs. or even 300 Lbs. not that I think that she would get there but if she did I know I would love her that big and Fat....and she is only 5' 3". So the size and weight has definitely changed over the years. The other thing is my fetish has also turned onto myself and now I think the most arousing thing would be for both my wife and I to be in a Mutual Gaining relationship with both of us getting fatter all the time. Also this fetish is much stronger various times throughout the year but as I get older it seems like it is stringer all the time and almost always at the fore front in my mind.
8 years