Story authors

Okay, so I'm working on a story and every time I think I've got it I feel there's something not quite right about it.

My main issue is the conflict, all stories revolve around conflict to some degree but where do I work that into a weight gain story?

To me it seems the only way to do it would be ways that take away from it being sexy like "they don't want this but have to take it anyway" or "they gain weight as a side part to some major story with a conflict instead" or just forgetting it all together.

From guides that I've looked up for making a good story I know that the plot also needs four things to excel: Conflict, Opposition, Risk and Change; which can all be phrased in the form of a question in each case: What does the lead character want? What's Standing in their way? What happens if they don't get it? and Why now?

My story mainly focuses on mainly on the physical transformation of our lead from a skinny human into a fat dragon, and then further into the type of dragon body they'd prefer, and even further into being a female dragon (as introduced subtly at the beginning, they are transgender but the magic of the dragon transformation also allows them to take on their actual gender).

Now where the problem emerges is what would the conflict be? They desire this change, they want to gain weight and want to have a body that reflects their gender so why would they have an issue with it coming true? Then if they did, that would mean they wouldn't be willingly gaining weight which is just part of being a dragon in the universe of the story I have imagined.

So, let's look at that universe and see where we could go to build a larger plot around the weight gain one. Well, to add something that isn't really related to fat feitshism would be the only fix. Which would take away form the erotic nature by making the story seem like it's not supposed to be erotic.

So the only plot I could come up with goes something like this: They want to be a dragon and gain weight but are afraid of people seeing them like this. The problem is I have purposefully written out other characters for a reasons I'll get into in a moment, so who are they hiding from? There won't be any scenes of someone knocking on their door to make them try and hide behind it or anything like that.

So my only idea to that was that they would run into problems from their weight and start loosing it thinking they shouldn't be fat (they keep knocking things over or can't reach things they used to be able to). Though this just brings us back to the problem of them not liking it.

So here's my other other idea: nothing like that happens at all, they just seem to loose and gain weight without explanation in the story as they go on this journey of self discovery. So where's the conflict in that?

Now the only other solution was an auxiliary conflict, so here's where I have some help form the medium this story will be once it's done. I'm trying to make a surreal first person point and click adventure (hence only one character). This adventure is based in the person's house which keeps changing layout as they continue on gorging and gaining. This was an idea I had but it still doesn't give me a conflict, at least I don't think.

Also, I feel that each scene of interactivity is almost exactly the same here, they need to find something and the player is shown that the house has changed and they have to now solve a puzzle or tow to continue the gaining. This is something I also feel takes away from the sexiness of it all and thus makes me think I should instead make a surreal animation (though given all I had planned it would be rather lengthy, not quite a feature film but still long).

Lastly, why not just write a surreal story or a comic? Well the comic idea I'm considering if I can't do animations, but the writing I actually have a problem with. I get too philosophical when writing. I use the actions as a metaphor to have some commentary on life and I don't really want to do that in a story you're supposed to be turned on by.

Still, even if I did either or, it doesn't solve my issues of finding a conflict. Any help is appreciated, thanks in advance.

The conflict doesn't have to center on the transformation itself. The protagonist could have things that would not go well if the change occurred, like a family that relied on the human's life to also live. Or there could be a push by the town to eliminate dragons, so attaining the goal could create a problem.

I actually have considered both of these options.

In earlier drafts the lead lived in a world where dragons had to hide form humans for one of two reasons depending on the draft, either because dragons are secretly in control of reality and can't let humans in on this, or because humans were aware of dragons and had it out for them.

The only problem with either mainly deals with the problem I mentioned in my post about my writing getting more philosophical in my writing and that leads to issues.

Earlier drafts that featured the family would go on to reveal that the lead didn't belong to this family and was either kidnapped or abandoned by their mother who died shortly after their birth or even shortly before.

All of these plots start to go down dark paths for me in writing. Once I start needing a motivation for the opposing force in each of these ideas, my solutions end up being very dark and I can never think of ones that are lighthearted

For example: why do humans want to eliminate dragons? My answer was that they are secretly being controlled by an entity of pure hatred who has brainwashed humanity to have an unnatural hatred towards anything dragon, while also being fully ready to allow this entity to do it's own horrendous actions without any consequences.

I won't go into the entity, none of it was good in any way, and does NOT belong in an erotic fiction story. Though this was really the only villain I could come up with really.

In the drafts where dragons just had to hide we had to reveal why and it was either the above or that dragons are the natural predators to humans and eat them. This I felt turned the dragons into the villain of the story. I mainly added this for scenes of vore but came to realize these scenes muddied the line between whose good and bad in this story and that didn't work.

So I guess we've stumbled onto my main issue, my plots and even just my narrative descriptions tend to take a dark turn. Yesterday I had tried to write out the lead enjoying a milkshake but they comically finished it in one gulp, then my brain messed it up and I started typing "I guess these good things don't last long" or "Moments of bliss like this don't last forever" both of which take away from the comedy of the moment and imply negative thoughts in the lead.

This is why my suggestions for each of these was to get rid of them. Antagonist getting too real: there is no longer an antagonist. Narration getting too depressing: make a story that exists with little to no narration.

After writing this all last night I figured out how to make this internal conflict for the character work, their desire is to fit in but they also want to gain weight and in becoming a dragon they still fear that gaining weight will make them not fit in. Eventually they come to discover dragons are naturally fat and this is what makes them realize they can both do what they want and fit in now.

Still, I know I'm going to accidentally imply dark things in my narration if I'm not careful, so I need to solve this issue. It's probably based on my own issues but I'm afraid of going into those after what happened last time I tried to get help on this very thing elsewhere.

Sorry, maybe I can find some way to do this easily enough. Various tools exist out there that can make animating easier so maybe I should look into them. Thank you though, I was able to at least get down to the root of the problem from your suggestion.

Just one more thing I want to touch on, and I hope this helps you. You mentioned that you didn't want to get too philosophical in what ultimately is a fun turn on story.

I think having some philosophy and emotional currency can give your story some pathos and set it apart from just a recitation of food items and body parts.

Just as you can find a woman beautiful but find the woman you love more beautiful, I think a turn on story can be that much more of a turn on if you care what actually happens in it.

YMMV. Take what you like and leave the rest.

[REDACTED]

Sorry, I felt I shouldn't have typed any of what I typed. I think I might just be over thinking things, but I'm too paranoid that I will start to bring up bad things in my past subconsciously through writing philosophically.

Thus I feel I shouldn't do that, I've been through things and don't have as much trust in people as I should have and thus I should avoid bringing it up as much as possible.

I wanted to start making fetish fiction/comics/whatever to help me get better and I'm not sure I can even do it. I'll try at least, hopefully I'll get somewhere.

I started writing in 2010, for _me_, as an anti-suicide measure. Originally it was never intended for anyone else to see. I had energy from thoughts and things inside me which Needed To Get Out.

My suggestion (and i read this whole thread):

* Ignore all rules. Except do practice excellent grammar, spelling, and continuity, so *almost* all rules. And of course the societal/site ones like underage stuff, for things you actually want to release to the world.

* Write for You. Let it go where it goes. Too dark?: let it do that. Not erotic enough?: let it do that. Too philosophical?: let it do that.

No one says you have to show the final result to anyone.

What happened with me was i kept writing a lot and sometimes reading others’ stories, and writing more, and eventually without thinking about it i was a fatlovesex novelist. Maybe not one that anyone besides me wants to read, but it has all the elements of conflict and so on that you listed, plus good grammar, spelling, story continuity, flow, etc., even if the one i’ve released to date is too long and not erotic enough for many in our community.

Best Wishes with your writing process.

You don't know how much I needed to hear this.

Thank you, I will do that. Just go for it, that's what I need to do. Stop worrying and do it.

That said, I think I'm going to try out drawing again to see if that might be more my thing, but I will return to writing with what I've learned no matter what happens.

Whether it be to assist my drawings by giving them story or to be the whole thing, I will write and I don't care who doesn't like what my soul decides to sing out I'm just gonna do it anyway.

I need to get things off my chest and this is the way to do it.. Thank you, I will do this.

I managed to write out a story and even post it here, starting about the time I sent the message I sent yesterday or so I started jotting this down.

I'm so grateful for your help on getting me over this and I hope it's okay for me to post the link here
fantasyfeeder.com/stories/view

This is based on a story I made many years ago, but that story was just made for me to act out while I had pillows in my clothes. As such it might be lacking in some areas but at least I tried.

I hope people enjoy it, I always did when I acted out. I admit it is missing dialogue as that was never set in stone and I've since evolved this story into something completely different to the point you wouldn't even know it came from here.

It is that story I've been struggling with for the most part, but decided to see where I may need to improve can be established from this test story that it started out as. Thank you again, it feels good to finally have it out there.

That’s a nice brief one-and-done story, lydsville! Not sure what other readers will think, but i’m glad you posted this.

I especially like/appreciate the careful, precise way you handled the pronouns during the transition—i’ve done basically the same thing in several of my (not yet published) stories.

The way the pacing picks up exponentially towards the end in other stories is often a mistake or oversight or rush job. Here in your particular story, i think it works quite effectively. The way you handle the sudden new life acceptance aspect is nice and satisfying.

The story is quite decent as it is.
I have a few minor suggestions for your consideration.

*Possessives*
This seems to be a problem for a lot of people. I fear the apostrophe ' may fall into disuse, via misunderstanding and misuse. So i’m typing this out here for anyone who struggles with apostrophes who may be wandering by and reading this thread, not solely you.

the witches’ house — apostrophe at the end: 2 or more witches live in the house

the witch’s house — apostrophe before the s (and in this case different spelling—no e): 1 witch lives there

Then there’s the its vs. it’s situation:
it’s: always a contraction of it is
It’s *really* smoky in Los Angeles right now, from all the state’s wildfires and the prevailing winds and pressure systems.

its: belonging to it.
The gargoyle scratched its head maniacally.

My personal test, to know which to use: if the sentence is correct with “it is” instead of “it’s”, then that form with the apostrophe is used. If it makes no sense with “it is”, then the word should be “its” with no apostrophe.

Your story has:
the magic would do it's thing

but the magic would do it is thing
makes no sense, so it should be:
the magic would do its thing

* Autocorrect *
There appear to be a couple of places where it looks like autocorrect changed words.

“and a could of moobs about half that distance out”
Thinking “could” was supposed to be “couple”.

Mmm… i’m not seeing the other one right now. It was pretty obvious, so if you do a slow, careful read-through, you’ll find it and be able to correct it.

Very nice short story. Made my morning. Now i’m off to do more work on one of my own (coincidentally involving accredited Witches [equivalent of professors] at a university of magic).

I'm really glad the only problems are spelling and grammar. I did in fact use Autocorrect to correct my spelling and that's what messed up some of the grammar. I'll correct this when I get the chance though, thank you for point it out.

The pacing was both because I was being rushed once I got to that point in the story but also because of the way the story was invented. As it was acted out I started making the transformation go quicker as I got excited.

I was more afraid that the lack of dialogue would make the story uninteresting. I created it with Constance saying things to herself like "Oh my goodness, it's Xmas! How did the time slip away from me so quickly, I need to make food for my family before they show up." but I didn't like them and I couldn't remember all of them.

My other fear was that people wouldn't get the reality warping around Constance, that her family were invisible at the table and Constance was talking to herself until the witches showed up again. Also, that time wasn't actually changing like that around Constance and it was still the day she entered the house.

This is the common theme between this original and the stories that followed after, reality changes around the lead but it is also possible the lead is only perceiving these changes and they aren't actually happening.

This even appeared in non-fetish stories I had written, like one based on dreams that I had where an entity had taken over humanity and the lead character (based on myself) seems to be able to make it reveal itself and thus the only people who can stop it bring them along and befriend them to defeat it. Though in the end it is revealed that there was no entity, some humans are just cruel without something forcing them to be through magic. Also, those who can defeat the entity finally reveal they are mental projections of the lead.

So as you can see did have a real life inspiration for this idea. I've two more stories based on this I can post here once I've written them out. One is about a vampire and the other about a mermaid, though the mermaid one is rather big and might be worked into something else instead.

My only other fear was that the visuals would be lost as the way this story was created I mainly saw it more than said it. I'm glad that my concerns aren't as founded as I thought. Though sorry it isn't really one to return to again and again but that is why I tried making stories that were longer and also gave the reader more of a reason to return.