Lifestyle tips

I didn't allow this fetish to dictate who I married. My wife was very skinny. I told her about being a feeder. She thought the whole thing was creepy and disgusting. She claimed she would NEVER get fat. And I left it at that - she's into things that I'm not.

But she's always been a huge foodie. And nature ran its course and here she is literally doubled her weight. She still can't get into the kink part of it. But that's OK.

I'm a firm believer that putting the bug in her ear about not caring about her weight initiated the self-fulfilling prophecy. And being a good winer and diner introducing someone to the joys of gluttony is not that hard of a thing to do in a loving natural way. Don't have to be all slimy and pushy about it.

That's it.

I think with the kink you have the best chance of seeing it fulfilled as most women naturally tend to gain as they age, only slowed down by expectations of having to be thin. Once they know "I don't mind you're *skinny* but I prefer you would gain" instead of "I don't mind you're *fat*", things just happen, even when they won't be in the "oh wow" feeling of it

I feel like it's most likely a foregone conclusion that's it's very unlikely I'll meet, and ultimately marry a woman who's into this.

On web sites like this one, men seriously outnumber the women. Though some men are gay, it's a supreme disappointment if I see a female profile where she's lesbian. I don't have a problem with lesbians per-se (why would I?), but it's disappointing when it makes unbalanced numbers even more grim. The so-called sex worker women who are also only in it for the money, and not interested on making friends, chatting, and so on, when I see one, also causes similar disappointment.

I'm not bitter about this, it's just how things are. While I do attempt on occasion attempt to reach out to users on here, I don't get my hopes up and I have very low expectations. To take any other approach or have any other expectations will lead to disappointment.

However, not all is lost. One is a lot of users come and go. Some return years later, or never return at all. This suggests there may be more out there. There's also those who never do discover these web sites. But even then, the odds of being able to talk about this with someone in person, without it blowing up in your face, are very narrow. It's akin to the odds of winning one of the prizes from the state lottery that's worth over $1 million.

But still, not all is lost. At least if you don't have to engage in all aspects of this. For example, if you have a fantasy about funnel feeding, do you actually have to do it? If you're like most here, you don't.

In the U.S., and in most other countries in the developed, and even developing world, the obesity rate and acceptance continues to increase every day amongst all or nearly all demographic groups, regardless of age, income group, race, etc.

There's also a tendency where with age, pregnancy, middle age, spread, etc. for women to gain weight over time. Men are also likely to gain weight over time as well. It's actually to the point where if someone looks to be almost too fit, spending too much time at the gym, that I tend to assume they either work a low income part-time job or have no job at all. Even construction workers and skilled laborers (like electricians or plumbers) are likely to have a bit of a gut nowadays. Even if I go to the gym, many of the other patrons there are unlikely to be skinny.

The effects are also multiplied if she's already fat or at least chubby or plump when I meet her.

I also suspect that a lot more folks out there secretly want to be fat, even if they won't admit it, even to themselves. There's the size tolerance and acceptance movement for one, which in recent years has experienced unprecedented success, which I expect will only continue and become more widespread. There's also those who may even tell themselves things like "maybe I should spend more time at the gym, but.." or "I probably shouldn't indulge in this, but.."

The only things about that which disappoint me is the misery the weight loss industry, which is rarely even successful in their goals, causes. Or the amount of money wasted on gym memberships, especially in January that are used little, if at all. That money is better spent on cheesecake. It's disgusting how gym chains take advantage of this.

I expect that if I'm just patient long enough, I'll eventually get what I want. And I can help foster an environment where indulging is easy while slaving away and torturing yourself at the gym is not expected.

I just need to find the right lady for me. Most are chubby, plump, or fat already. Given enough time, pregnancy weight gain, office jobs, and middle age spread, I have no doubt she'll gain a lot of weight. To find a chubby lady who loves to eat, watch her gain from the pregnancy, office spread, middle age spread, and so on. Eventually in the more distance future, I'd then have a plump MILF (who became a MILF because of me) in form fitting dresses, wedging her cankles into heeled shoes, while her large boobs and thunder thighs jiggle every time she takes a step. And the whole time throughout this entire process, I will want to ravage her and make her scream in the bedroom all of the time.

I'm on this site for the pictures, the message board, and sometimes the stories. While it would be nice to make a romantic connection this way, or to even make friends, I don't think it's likely and I'm not getting my hopes up. Even if I leave this site and never come back, even if I ultimately marry a woman who's not into feederism and may never even heard of it, I still think the odds of my getting most of what I want are still high.

But if you insist on only dating those who are explicitly into feederism, the odds are overwhelming that you will remain single until the day you die. This simply isn't a practical course of action.

The reality is there are millions of women out there that are very overweight, total foodee's, enjoying the "gaining" lifestyle that simply don't know about this fetish. Most of them are totally astonished that there are folks into obese women and desire to wine and dine them to be even fatter.

I think there are a lot of women out there that would develop this kink if they had exposure to it.

"Kink empathy", perhaps? I've shared my interest in feedism to both partners and friends, and while my experience are certainly anecdotal (and not data), it does seem like the kinkier the person, the more accepting they are.

Absolutely this. I've been involved in the BDSM Scene most of my adult life, and pretty much all of my partners have been from there. None of them have been feedists, but they've all been fat and open to playing with my fetish, even if they're not open to gaining. We do roleplay, going to buffets (at least before COVID), general talk about how sexy fat is, gentle teasing, etc. (I have to admit, I don't think it would work for me with a partner who was fat and didn't want to be fat. As much as i'm a fatty and a feedist, I'm also a fat admirer and I need my partner to be comfortable with my, well, admiring their fat.)

I've found the more "different" (and accepting of that difference) a person is, the easier it is to get them to understand/accept something like fat admiration or feedism, even if it's not their thing. If someone is, say, a proud geek, well, they're already going against the grain of society, what's one more thing? (This is how I met kinky partners before I got into the BDSM Scene. The kink-geek crossover is HUGE.)

Note: I'm the kind of feedist (mutual gainer) who doesn't actually need my partner to be actively gaining (or me to be actively gaining) for me to get off. I don't know if this would work if I required the actual gains to be happy.

This whole statement is spot on. Every female that I dated after I gained hated the fact of fetish and yet they partook of the food and libations and as they saw themselves as fatter they came into it organically.