sweet_cuddles:
So my husband and I have been considering having our first baby sometime when COVID settles down a bit. I'm just curious, does having kids make you feel less inclined to participate in this fetish? I feel like I need to try to be my healthiest to take care of this small person and make sure they're eating a balanced diet because I can make a choice with my weight and food but they have to depend on me to make choices for them to an extent... it makes me want to prolong having kids for a bit longer lol but I'm already 26 now. Tell me your experiences!
So my wife and I have 3 (7, 3 and 18months).
We're talking together about this together as I type.
1. Yes during pregnancy your sex life changes. Usually for the better after the 1st trimester. We continued our feeding kick but, switched to healthier stuff (no more donut holes on the bedside table)
2. After becoming a mom, you have responsibilities but, gaining becomes easier for most as there is a lifestyle shift. Although not her largest, she is big and now thanks to 3 large babies, very very soft in the middle.
You can gain to a point healthily and in both the USA and the UK there are regular cholesterol and blood sugar checks during and after pregnancy up until jr is 6 months old ish.
Keeping active is possible but so is regular over eating and snacking.
If you like changes in you body and getting softer and heavier and rounder then pregnancy is great. Just remember, there's someone sharing the space and stuffing isn't easy when your organs are reduced to 1/3 of their normal space.
3. Postpartum sex is a slow relearning curve for most. Give it time and see where the land lays. Don't assume everything will be the same physically or mentally.
4. Gaining and keeping baby weight is a societal norm, despite pressures to lose some, you are expected to keep most. I feel my wife "gained " her figure through becoming a mother, some claim women loose theirs. She's never lost the tummy from the first and has added to it each of our 8 years. You'll find plenty of chubby and fat moms in social groups and can coast in to obesity throughout your 30s if that's what you wish.
As with all gaining, there's no rush, you're 26 and it can be a kink you can enjoy for decades. And if you're lucky you can keep the weight in to old age so long as you're sensible [don't daily gorge heavy cream shakes and only leave the couch to use the bathroom and expect to not have health issues]
We've taken our kink in to our mid to late 30s by maturing it. High end dinners where she'll eat both hers and most of my tasting menu. Good chocolates, long brunches, her truly enjoying the early baking efforts of our 3 and 7 year old. And, the occasional box of macarons on the bedside table once the kids are asleep.
The weight and softness keep coming but its usually due to a shock in the dressing room that she realizes the progress.
5. Being a reflection and example of society to your little ones is part of parenthood. If you're fat and lazy expect your kids to notice. Own it and show confidence in what you do and remember being a good parent is possible, being a perfect parent isnt. If you enjoy sitting down and snacking and being pampered then let it happen but also let the kids be around and not feel neglected. Put on family films or educational shows while you park yourself and eat. Being physically healthy is partly being mentally healthy, and being present and engaging is easier when you're hapoy at home eating than it is if you're always at the gym being unhappy with yourself.
There are a raft of options and what we feel the most important thing is, is to be honest with yourself and your husband about how you both feel, before during and after pregnancy. That goes for kinks too.
