LilRascl:
For me it came in stages: I’ve fantasised about growing a huge spare tyre of a belly since I was a child, but suffered with disordered eating/bulimia when I was 16-17. I was a chubby kid and never got below 150lbs though. By the time I was out of high school I had developed a “chubby girl with brains, wit, and a great personality” attitude about myself, which is now deeply entrenched in me and gives me a fuckton of confidence. I also practiced and eventually stopped any body shaming self-talk, and I try to live by the rule of never being meaner to myself than my most honest best friend would be. It’s worked out well too!
The coping strategies I use now are all based on two things I remind myself of if a nasty comment comes my way: 1. I chose to be this fat, and 2. I worked hard to grow this fat because of how much I really, truly I love it!
At the end of the day, I’m the only one who gets to live my life, and I’ve made a conscious and irreversible decision to live it exactly as I want to, and that continues to be in a fat/growing body 🙂
I hope this helps! Best of luck with your research - I’m glad academics are asking good questions of us 😋
Well said, and here is what I can add. To get as fat as some of us are; that takes time and dedication so I see those who have taken that plunge and "waddled into the kitchen" like those professional eaters so they inspire me. The next step is to get rid of those folks in your life who bring that type of energy to always say something hurtful and once you realize that your life is so much more peaceful then the next step is to own what they are saying and accept it. I had family members call me lard butt and "you must be a pig to get this fat" and the truth is that they are right; I am a pig both figuratively and philosophically. It takes a certain mindset to actively move beyond your greediness and succumb to it to a point that your body becomes the success of your submission to it. The truth is, most folks who say things want to feel powerful by trying to trigger me but what they don't realize is that for those of us who actually waddled this long path; those sarcastic comments trying to humiliate us becomes a sign that your efforts to expand and be obese has caused someone to comment about it and some of us come to like when people comment on our girth. Others don't even give a damn about how fat we are. All of the negative comments I get bow are all online while offline I have found more people who dig my fat than hate it