General

Ironically I (fit guy) seem to struggle to get the interest of chubby girls... they literally never match me and never seem that interested even when I flirt irl.

Perhaps this is arrogance talking but I was quite surprised to discover this since I assumed the fact how I was fit and muscular would work to my advantage here.

I give off a friendly and open vibe as far as I know so the only thing I can think of is that perhaps me being fit is making them feel a bit daunted or insecure about their own bodies. These aren’t 500lb girls mind you, just girls who have a bit of a belly.

Of course there’s a chance they just don’t find me attractive, but it seems too extreme.

Meanwhile I seem to get a bit of attention from “gym girls” but of course it’s not worth much because I’m turned off by that body type.

So I’m wondering how you would react to a fit person showing interest in you. Would you feel unsettled? Assume they’re just desperate? Trying to lead you on? Or is their physique not really a factor?

I absolutely love fit guys. If one seems to be flirting though I just assume it is to make fun or me or a dare or realllllllly desperate! This is just in theory though because I don't think guys have actually flirted with me or been interested in me IRL since I became bigger

That’s a stereotype as well that chubby girls have more fun lol. I know skinny barbie girls who are genuinely nice and great company and I know fat girls who are boring as fuck and bitter - but I agree that many more guys actually like chubby girls than the media and society would have us think.

Several of my friends who also workout a lot have admitted that they find soft and curvy girls sexier than gym girls - that was one on one... I don’t know if they’d admit it to the group because of some silly fear of being judged.

It’s funny cause I went viral on Facebook almost three years ago cause I made a post ranting about the very things you said lol. Every time I stepped to a BBW, their response is ALWAYS “I’ve liked you I but I didn’t think you liked me”

It’s plenty of fit guys that prefer big women. Confidence is key. Nothing turns a fit guy on more than a big woman with confidence. If you love fit guys, go for it you never know.

I had major bullying issues when I was younger so that def makes me a bit worried when talking to fit guys! I guess I need more confidence!

I guess i have a very niche preference - I’m not really into generally big girls, i go for more conventional attractive thinner/regular girls with particularly chubby bellies - so come to think of it their self esteem is probably higher because they’re still conventionally attractive in most ways. Plus it’s a rare and often temporary body type. But still, I’ve seen maybe 100 or so girls like that on dating apps and haven’t matched with a single one, meanwhile if I swipe on a thin or fit girl I’ll often match.
I’ll start focusing more on offline approaching... plus I can actually get a better idea of what they look like that way.

I think everyone deserves to feel confident in their skin regardless of their size tho of course

In all honestly, if a FIT as in musclar man is interested in me i would feel it is a joke as many are REALLY mean to us bigger ladies here in the USA. So I would remind him i am fat and avoid him ^_^

I find that disheartening, cause while I am chubby now I used to be really fit and had love for bigger ladies then too.

For me, it would have nothing to do with your body type...

It really depends how you came across. Do you seem genuine, are you funny, are you kind... or are you just creepy, full of yourself etc.

For a lot of people, being approached by someone who is typically attractive can be intimidating. Especially if they are prone to low self esteem and doubt. Or maybe they are just guarded for self security or not in the right frame of mind for that type of interaction.

You never know the mind of someone you approach on the random. I would keep the flirting / compliments to a minimum and try striking up a casual conversation. This makes people feel a lot more at ease. Also, don't try to pick up women who are out and about on their own, do it when they are in safe environment and with a friend or a group. Make sure you are paying attention to body language and what they are saying... and most importantly leave them be if you are making them uncomfortable and it is clear they are not interested.

Also... not everyone is into the fit/ athletic physique. So don't assume because that maybe describes you, that you have the right to a successful flirting interaction.

Just play it cool and let the vibes guide you.

Namaste 🕉🙏