Munchies:
My experience with people on here has been ... interesting. Keep in mind this is coming from a cishet woman.
Most of the men here are more interested in a good time than finding a relationship. Which is fine. But the majority of the guys I've spoken to do not know how to talk to women - or people, if I'm honest. I don't go into chat very often, but when I do, I often sustain psychic damage. Most of it has nothing to do with kink either.
I wouldn't call most of them bad people. They get in their own way. They come in too hot and too fast, making me put my guard up. I once had a guy tell me he'd love for me to come to Europe with him, and he'd take excellent care of me. We'd known each other for less than 48 hours.
And again, I don't think he's a bad person. I think the desperation has gotten to him.
I've befriended two guys on here; it's strictly platonic.
I do have a feedee I met on here. But we are more having fun than being in a relationship. Our schedules are too out of sync, and the distance is too far for us to have any romantic relationship, which is a shame because he's a pretty great guy.
I agree that a lot of people on here seem to either lack interest in anything beyond finding a good time, or they just don't know how to talk to people.
Many only send a quick "hi" or "are you up for some fun?" or "are you into X?" which doesn't inspire me to follow up at all. Then there are others that will try to start a conversation with an essay describing in great detail all the things they intend to do to me, which comes across as desperate and creepy.
If people are genuinely trying to find a relationship it's good to start by introducing yourself and showing some interest in getting to know the other person beyond your shared kink. Yes it takes more time and effort, but wouldn't you want a prospective partner to put in some effort for you?