General

I’m so done with chatting to people in this community…

FattMatt:

While still being online she stops responding for over an hour. I ask if she’s still there because I found it odd she didn’t reply for so long.


1 hour is not long at all... Especially if she does not have a premium account. Being "online" doesn't mean anything, maybe she kept the page open while doing something else, or reading a story, talking to someone else, who knows...
She doesn't ow you anything. It's intrusive to keep asking why the person is not responding. That's what you did wrong I think.

By the way you can message me, you look hot! ^^
2 years

I’m so done with chatting to people in this community…

The best advice I can give is to keep being patient. From what I understand of your approach in this case, it's similar enough to mine where I don't really want to start feederism talk right away; maybe that's the wrong approach on a forum dedicated to feederism, but my perspective on it is that an interest in feederism is implied here; it's a topic that can be skipped. There are other parts of someone's personality that can be just as if not more interesting than their kinks.

That being said, remember that people have lives and work outside of dating apps. I leave these tabs open while working on a different computer, and it's likely other people might do something similar. Be patient; even though it's just one more day waiting for a response out of the five years you've kept going, it will hurt, maybe more than each day that's already passed. But the most important step isn't the first, or the last; it's always the next one.

So keep reaching out. Maybe change your approach; you might be happier and find more success looking on a traditional dating app/site and bringing up your kink once you've gotten to know each other. That isn't to say it'll be easy. Online dating is the 2nd most demoralizing thing I've ever experienced, only behind job hunting.

But keep trying. Take a break to focus on yourself and other parts of your life, if you have to, but keep trying in the end. Be respectful, and be patient, but be determined. And remember that if people act like shit to you, that's their problem, not yours. Move on to better people.
2 years

I’m so done with chatting to people in this community…

FattMatt:
PolyPinoyPuppy

Thanks for the advice. For the conversations I did have, I’ve tried every single approach. No-one is perfect, I get that. But after countless of interactions gone to waste this one just left a bad taste.


I understand how you feel. It's why I don't go into chat very often unless I am going to chat with a specific person/people.

Some advice:

If the conversation fizzles out, or the other person hasn't responded back to you, just move on. If something came up, they will let you know. Otherwise, they don't respect your time.

State your intentions upfront. If you wanna get to know a person first, or just be horny in DMs, say so (politely). Of they aren't interested, then you can respect each other's time and move on.

No relationship (platonic, romantic, sexual) works well without a firm foundation. If all you do is feedist stuff, you're building a house on sand. Make a connection first and maintain it.
2 years

I’m so done with chatting to people in this community…



FattMatt:
Thanks for the advice. Maybe I just need to go into a conversation asking what they want, getting to know each other or just fat talk.


This sounds like something I might try now too; I don't particularly care for trying to read people's minds, especially if their profiles are nearly empty.
2 years

I’m so done with chatting to people in this community…



FattMatt:
Thanks for the advice. Maybe I just need to go into a conversation asking what they want, getting to know each other or just fat talk.

PolyPinoyPuppy:
This sounds like something I might try now too; I don't particularly care for trying to read people's minds, especially if their profiles are nearly empty.


A lot of people make the whole chat thing more complcated than it needs to be. At the end of the day, you are having conversations with people. If you can communicate effectively and have mutual respect, you'll cover most of your bases.
2 years

I’m so done with chatting to people in this community…

Just be patient.As has been said sometimes people leave chat open while doing other things.I usually let people know in some way if my attention has gone elsewhere.I'll say brb,afk or something else to clarify I'm still on but may be busy elsewhere for a bit.Another thing to remember is sometimes if someone is connected to the site thru their phone they may lose connection.The situation you mentioned is as much their fault as yours....they may have felt you were being pushy BUT they could have also let you know if they got distracted from the conversation.
2 years

I’m so done with chatting to people in this community…

Some people have used the Internet for 30 years and other people discovered it last week or at least act like that.
2 years

I’m so done with chatting to people in this community…

Stop talking. Start doing. You are a feeder. Feed somebody.
2 years

I’m so done with chatting to people in this community…

Myusername4fantasyfeeder:
Stop talking. Start doing. You are a feeder. Feed somebody.


This is terrible advice. I talk to too many feeders who have this mentality. They are honestly the worst part of the site. They do not care about you as a person and want to get their rocks off.

They don't listen. You are nothing to them.

The other day, I got a message from a feeder who only wanted to feed someone. I told him I was a muscular domme feeder and wasn't interested. Still, he persisted.

I did scare him off by telling him he was cute and would look even cuter on my strap. So there's that.

Feeding - especially online feeding - is an art. And if you want to do it well, you have to get to know the other person on some level.
2 years

I’m so done with chatting to people in this community…

Myusername4fantasyfeeder:
Stop talking. Start doing. You are a feeder. Feed somebody.

Munchies:
This is terrible advice. I talk to too many feeders who have this mentality. They are honestly the worst part of the site. They do not care about you as a person and want to get their rocks off.

They don't listen. You are nothing to them.

The other day, I got a message from a feeder who only wanted to feed someone. I told him I was a muscular domme feeder and wasn't interested. Still, he persisted.

I did scare him off by telling him he was cute and would look even cuter on my strap. So there's that.

Feeding - especially online feeding - is an art. And if you want to do it well, you have to get to know the other person on some level.


I take your point, but the point of being a feeder is to feed. Things like "online" or "encouraging" or "talking about it" are marginalia, and I get the impression for people on FF that the marginalia has taken over to the detriment of actual feeding

Soldiers fight. Pilots fly. Jugglers juggle. Runners run. Somebody calling themselves a feeder has to feed.
2 years
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