General

Your post intrigues me. I also have many questions and there is a lot about this I can relate to. I will give it some thought and hopefully you will get some great responses from people in this vibrant and interesting community. In terms of good, I have met some people who seem really great, genuine, fantastic people since I signed up on this site. I keep getting surprised by how many good conversations and exchanges of positive energy I have had with mostly men but also some women and trans individuals. Bad for me has been getting sent unsolicited dick pics. Why? I know I make guys hard but it doesn’t mean I want to see all the hard ons. I also don’t like the discomfort I get sometimes when I eat too much of certain types of food. I am really new to being socially active on this site but so far the goods have far outweighed any negatives. I was that woman who couldn’t let herself gain cos then all the sports and being strong and fast and fit would end and I could end up an obese hungry hippo. It’s starting to happen now. No more rock climbing or kick boxing and I can barely do a wall push up never mind the 50 to 100 advanced push ups I did almost daily. I can barely do a plank. I do have health issues and as I gain I feel my body getting less healthy but I don’t think I can stop now as I am too greedy and addicted and sometimes stay up all night eating and gorge myself into food comas at work making me miss deadlines. I sometimes think, what if I get too addicted to food and become a woman who needs two first class seats to fly or a whole row and will need help being wheeled onto the plane and pushed through the doors. As a bigger person my life is more expensive and I can’t do many activities and things I loved doing before. I want to get fitter and healthier as I mentioned on my profile and I want to be respected at work. I thought I could just live vicariously through seeing the gaining of content creators and imagining being like them, or reading gaining stories but the urge to fatten up was just too strong and now my belly almost covers the entire front of my panties when I stand up and I carry this sack of heavy fat up with my arms when I go up and down stairs to make it easier. It’s a lot to carry. This kink is messing up my life in many ways and I have indigestion right now and don’t think I can ever date normally with the way I am now because I just want to eat massive amounts of food like a savage beast and drink gaining smoothies and melted ice cream and right now I don’t even care that I am recovering from a chest infection. I just keep thinking about all the massive amounts of fattening food in my sister’a house and how badly I want to force even more into my already packed stomach. It’s overwhelming a lot of the time. One of my main priorities now is to get a waterproof mattress cover cos living in my obese body with my big thighs fighting for space with my big hanging belly all the time makes me so horny that I constantly wet the bed with excessive amounts of p@&£y juice, even if I put towels under me. It’s embarrassing. I can’t believe I took part in climbing contests and was training for kick boxing fights. There is no sign of that now when I look in the mirror or look down and try to see my toes. Horny fat pig now and I made my life harder and more expensive getting fat but I don’t think I would change it cos I have so much fun and it feels so good. So right and so I wrong.

Seems like your situation lines up with mine to a degree, except that I lack sexual experience, feederism-related or not. (It's equal parts amusing and frustrating that I've topped in a BDSM setting before I've even been in bed with someone.) That said, I love my partners dearly, and as frustrating as the absence of this kink in my relationships thus far has been, I'm hopeful for what the future brings.

I'm going to assume that you've discussed your specific interest in this kink with your partners (current or past, it's unclear), but if that isn't true, or for the sake of others reading this, I'll say that you should include this kink in discussions about what turns each of you on as you figure out how to best address each other's appetites. You may be in for a pleasant surprise.

That said, my track record for such confessions is nothing to brag about. My partner does not share my kink, nor do they want to participate in feederism, but they are already fat and these days they more readily admit how beautiful they are. (I will not claim any credit for this; therapy can do wonders for a person's confidence.) Their boundary against feederism is one I don't think will ever come down, as it's deeply rooted in trauma from past relationships. They are otherwise quite interested in more vanilla kinks, and thanks to them I've discovered a taste for topping that I don't think I'd have explored on my own.

They are also quite the advocate for ENM, which is something I've picked up in turn. For one thing, practicing ENM allows me to maintain a relationship with them and other partners regardless of whether they will share or entertain my kink, which is an enormous relief and allows me to pursue the full potential of those relationships without feeling like I have to choose between them and my kink.

I'm still looking for a feedee, and in fact I have yet to talk to my other partners about it, so who knows--maybe I'll get lucky and my search will end with someone I'm already talking to. In the meantime, I certainly relate to what you said about something being missing. It's frustrating to know how few of us there are, and, despite what I like to say about being open, the threat of being ostracized for this kink feels real.

I will hijack this thread a little and pose a question of my own to anyone who reads this thread. Who do you think is more likely to be receptive to this kink if they are not already a part of the community--people who are thin, fit, or average weight, or people who are already fat? My guess is the former; the latter group seem more likely to have suffered from and thus want to avoid the stigmas associated with being fat.

Oh, one more thing I forgot to mention in my post. I will say that your position is more difficult to be in than mine, I think, because I focus most often on the idea of stuffing someone rather than encouraging them to gain weight.

This has been reflected in my fiction and RP so far, but it's entirely possible that I'm wrong about my tastes or that I'll eventually crave a relationship with a gainer. That said, I do think I'd be happy being in a relationship with someone who would overeat or let me stuff them from time to time even if they otherwise tried to maintain or even lose weight to get to their ideal.

I seem to be in the minority in this regard, though.