PhoenixChimera:
Does anyone else just feel that they don’t belong here?
I’ve been here a long time, only really spoken to a handful of people in that time.
The last couple of years have seen a lot of health problems and in that time I needed friends, which I don’t have in the physical world, but have only found that I am nothing more than a belly to most.
It is a part of me, not the other way round.
I wonder what I’m doing wrong.
Gushloader:
The problem with me is that I cannot properly launch a convo. If I manage to do, then its fine. I feel something is wrong with me
I don’t think there’s anything wrong with the vast majority of active posters here, nor that (with a few exceptions, which typically get called out publicly) anyone is doing anything wrong. People are here for varying reasons, and sometimes there’s not a lot of activity, so a post or shout or (guessing) chat line gets no traction and wilts.
Munchies:
I have to say that when it comes to friends, it's quality over quantity. Most people on FF are not here to make friends. They are here to get their rocks off. There are decent, selfless people on here. Unfortunately, a lot of them are driven off the site by toxic members.
Had that (toxic) experience here middle of last decade, which kept me away long enough that my original account expired and vaporized.
Hopefully with more of us doing our parts to contribute in honorable, civil ways, the percentage of toxic members will decrease. Your high volume of high-quality posts certainly is setting a good example—thanks!
CuppaJoe:
Because the members of a topically-driven page often immediately share a common interest, I find that sometimes the members mistake connection for friendship. Connection is the spark that leads to friendship, I think, but is not the same as friendship itself. A friend checks on you when you are missing - a connection moves on to others in your absence.
There can still be enjoyable conversations and connections can evolve to friendship. I'm sure there are many members here whose initial connections have evolved into true friendships over time - but it takes duration, effort, and multiple shared experience to get to this point.
Excellent point. I’ve edged close to true friendships, and some are arguably connections which may someday advance there.
It saddens me to see long-time/familiar members feeling alienated, since i very much personally appreciate your all’s presence and posts.
I’ve felt alienated from most of the world most of the time, and again in recent days and weeks have been seriously considering whether i feel comfortable remaining amongst the living. Physical social spaces as well as virtual ones like here can feel foreign, with no place for me.
In terms of sites in our community, the personalities, interests, and overall focus can and does shift over time. I joined Feabie when it was new, but have never felt comfortable nor welcome there, and rarely participate there. Technically i like the site design of Curvage, but the content feels toxic to me. Dimensions has its regulars, and has been OK at times for me, but other times feels like an old folks’ home with a handful of regulars. FF has issues, but has always felt like home to me.
I may not be a very good connection (much less friend) due to my unreliability being here (or anywhere) as i struggle with personal issues. However when i am here, i strive to treat people with the respect and caring we all deserve (and i’ve had to deal with far more un-health/medical stuff than any one person should).
Hoping y’all stay around, but understanding if you feel the need to go,
))Jiggle((
