Sl2010:
My family is mostly pretty fatphobic and annoyingly direct. Very few filters. They’re well meaning, not exactly toxic, but it rarely makes me feel good about my weight. I don’t get much (I.e., any) positive reinforcement irl
Munchies:
If your family is doing that, then you need to set boundaries with them. Even if they are well-meaning, there's no need to demean you.
That said, it is a good idea to take care of your health while you gain. Make sure you are getting all the nutrition you need, stay moderately active, and don't skip checkups and appointments because you're afraid of being told to lose weight.
Sl2010:
I have set boundaries. They don’t say fatphobic things around me any more. They don’t comment on what I eat or how much I’ve gained either. But lack of saying is still lack of positive reinforcement. It’s why I’m here
I get you. There's a big difference between being tolerated and being accepted.
That said, I'm not so sure I'd like my family to comment positively on my eating habits and weight. If anything, I'd prefer them to be neutral - even if I didn't have a weight related fetish. Feels weird.