Nippy:
I’m thinking back to my teenage years, when people were beginning to show an interest in the opposite sex… the heart throbs, the leading men in every film, the posters other girls had on their walls…all lean and muscular. Even the boys people liked at school were of a certain build- chubby lads (and girls) didn’t really get a look in. It all felt so alienating to me, like ‘this is what I’m supposed to like?’ It just left me cold and I could barely even feign an interest. This was further complicated by the fact I was, and am, bisexual.
I knew what I liked but I neither felt I could say, like I wouldn’t even be taken seriously, nor would there be many people who I could even name. I think it’s a bit better now but there just weren’t really plus sizes singers or actors or anything then, or not ones who were marketed to young people anyway. No pin ups for me!
Sometimes I look back and wonder if there were other people who had broader tastes, so to speak, but also didn’t really say due to the teen need to conform. Either way, I’m so glad I’m an adult now and know it’s ok to like what I like and that I’m not the only one
i always found chubby and fat people more attractive... but when i was young, and until i moved for university, i never talked about it with anyone.
in high school i remember some very cruel comments and jokes being made behind the backs of girls (and boys) that i found very attractive. it didn't stop me from asking the girls out, but i didn't date very much in high school. and it wasn't until later that i became comfortable with my bi-sexuality (or pan-sexuality), so i never dared show interest in another guy.
i am very heartened in that my kids are growing up in a more accepting environment in many respects... it doesn't change teenage insecurities, they still have those. but sexuality and body positivity is far more open and less judgemental than it was in my youth.
the idea of being into feedism is still very taboo, i would say.
