General

Why would you want to? It's way more fun than vanilla sex

No. It's a part of you.

You choose to indulge it by being here

Might also be worth asking yourself if feedism is just a "fetish" for you, as opposed to a fundamental part of your sexuality.

In my mind the term "fetish" implies a take-it-or-leave-it attitude towards it. Idk, just a thought.

Speaking with a counselor or therapist will help you find the answers you are looking for. As you have found, trying to ignore this part of you isn't likely to help you manage the difficulties that you face. They might not have the specific expertise to deal speak about feederism directly, but managing libido and impulses in a healthy manner is precisely the kind of thing they can help with.

Not all mental health professionals are the same, so you should make sure to seek one who lists sex or relationships as a field of specialization. Even then, their methods for helping you will vary as much as their personalities.

If I had to guess what they would say, however, it's that they will confront you about whether feederism is something you really want to leave behind completely, or if what you're looking for is a way to reconcile your preferences with what is socially acceptable.

You seem to be leaning toward "fixing yourself to meet society's expectations." Most therapists I've heard of would steer you away from this kind of thinking. Rather, they would encourage you to find ways to enjoy your preferences in ways that don't conflict with your other priorities, finding a balance between your kink/fetish and your social/professional obligations. I am not a therapist, but the therapy I have participated in suggests that the enemy isn't your unprompted desires or intrusive thoughts, but the lack of acceptance you have for yourself and what makes you unique.

It's probably impossibe, what we are attracted to usually just works automatically with no control from our part.
Maybe by going to a psychologist, or even better a psychoanalist (I think for sexual/attraction things psychoanalists are pretty good, aka to get to know yourself better).


But then again, I'm a psychologist myself, and although I've meditated a lot about, even I can only offer some slight hypothesis about why myself I'm here and where does it come from

What would that be? I’ve heard fetishes stem from trauma.

Sometimes, but not always. Sometimes, fetishes are routed in euphoria.

Hello! Im also in a position where I'd love to just get rid of it! I think a good option might be ideology. It might not br sufficient alone, but it might help! If you need to talk about this, im open to that! I'd love to try and help you!

NocturnalDevotion:
What would that be? I’ve heard fetishes stem from trauma.[/quote]

My hypothesis on my own personal case, stems from the connection of two clues, the first is that I'm not only attracted to chubbier women, I'm almost repulsed by skinny ones.

The second is that as a kid my own mother gained weight when my brother was born, and it was really distressing to see her be bullied because of it almost everyday by her parents and her brothers, to the point I would cry, want to leave, etc.

It's my repulse from skinny girls that made me realise that it was a defence, and not just a simple attraction to something. I probably associated the skinnyness with violence towards my mother and as such I wanted nothing to do with it.

This is a guess, there's basically no scientific research on this, and my master thesis will be about babies so I will never find about it myself

Tbh, unless you deeply replace that void inside, subconsciously you may wind up finding different ways to act on it...some may cause other issues to arise.
Repressed for too long, it could wind up lashing back harder than before.
It's a part of you, best of luck.