General

I myself am a feedee and also a professional encourager.

My boyfriend, while sharing a lot of likes with me, is not into feederism at all.

However, his biggest fetish is making the Lady in his life happy.

He knows that feederism makes Me happy, so he encourages Me to find a feeder that can give Me that pleasure.

He also has engaged in a feeding session, it was wonderful. While it wasn't his thing, he still did it well and enjoyed it because I enjoyed it.

I'd suggest communicating your needs to your partner. Express that you simply want to share a passion of yours with her. She doesn't need to engage in any way she isn't comfortable with, but perhaps invite her to learn about the fetish to see if she's willing to play despite it not being her yum.

I'm gaining and in a relationship with my boyfriend, who is not into feederism

He's aware of the fact that I am and that I'm actively gaining. He just doesn't really care that I'm into it or that im getting fatter

The relationship comes first imo and any kink stuff is a bonus if they into it or not

Disclaimer up front: I'm inexperienced in in-person relationships, and your relationship might be different, having developed for two years. I'm mostly giving this advice as a way to process my own meager experience so that I can act on my own advice in the future.

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I'm currently going through something similar to you. I am a feeder in a relationship with someone who is trying to lose weight and isn't a feedee.

It took a lot of courage and build-up to disclose feederism to them. However, this was accelerated by the fact that we spoke quite a lot about their kinks. During that conversation, I told them I had a kink I was uncomfortable talking about early into the relationship, but invited them to guess and talk about kinks in general.

That conversation told me a lot about how open, accepting, and non-judgmental they were, and a couple weeks later I told them about my kink. Since then, I try to remember their non-judgemental attitude every time I feel self-conscious about talking feederism.

Additionally, I make sure to stress how much I value the goals they have which are contrary to my kink, as well as to insist that they tell me of any boundaries, reservations, or anxieties my interest causes.

All that done, I finally feel mostly comfortable just asking them when there's something I would enjoy. A lot of that comes from this being early in our relationship, as we're learning a lot about each other anyway.

If you already talk about sex regularly--right after sex is a great time for this, I would think--talk about what you enjoyed and what you would enjoy more of, escalating bit by bit. Of course, do the same for her; note what she seemed to react to most, ask how you can make it better.

Like others in this thread, I'm fortunate enough to have found someone who's accepting of my weirdness, and I hope that the same is true of you.

(wow life story time, sorry I kinda suck at writing lol)
As a female feeder in a non feeder/feedee relationship, it’s been working out but I’ve only recently have gotten to the point where I am even comfortable with talking about it.
I kept my secret of liking the idea of someone getting fatter or inflation for a loooong time, and it sort of developed into an eating disorder for me, especially when I had family who was shaming me for my weight when really I was just eating what I wanted.
But I grew up never wanting to be the ‘fat’ one, and over time I’ve become infatuated with chubby bodies, and would never mean to insult someone on their weight just because me, myself, was afraid of gaining weight. I love da chub lol

My relationship with my boyfriend has been great with lots of highs and lows, but there was a point in the relationship past our one year and I still never mentioned my main kink, since I knew he liked slim female bodies.
He has been with me even before I was even diagnosed with anorexia, which is a battle in itself but after I was diagnosed with that, that was when I realized how much it was weighing me down as a burden that I was essentially ‘hiding’ myself to him, and sex just didn’t feel right.
One night we had been in an argument and I told him I still felt like I couldn’t be open with him, but I knew it was because he didn’t know that other side of me. so I was like fuck it I just gotta get it off my chest, and it took a bit to come out but when I told him he just loved and accepted me, which I was kinda surprised.
I knew there were times of pretending to not be attracted to larger bodies, and I felt like such a hypocrite cause like, I freaking love it but I was too prideful in myself for trying to stay skinny, and it also just seems like everyone around me would be head over heels for a guy or gal with a six pack. So i wanted to fit in.
Nowadays, my boyfriend is not really a feedee but he knows that I love to watch him eat and I am always one to want to pay for fast food for him lol. Plus he really doesn’t mind adding the weight so I would say i’m very lucky. Although for me myself I do have body goals and workout, but that’s because I’ve grown to love fitness and going to the gym after being afraid for along time.
I still deal with anorexia today and can even get anal about going out to eat since I don’t want it for me, I want everyone else to be eating, which is difficult. But my friends and family have helped me and I’ve grown a lot over the past couple months.
I’m just glad to be at this spot of feeling comfortable with chatting a bit with others online about this funky kink and hope maybe this could help others to reach out, cause it can only get better by talking and understanding with yourself, and others

(also I typed this on my phone I feel my story’s kinda all over the place but uh yee thanks for reading. also feel free to ask questions or just also share ur own feelings

Well written about how you feel