Chat/Role play

Where there is an Office fatty, we also often find an Office feeder. Who is putting out all that food and snacks? Sure someone isn’t sizing you up and enabling your expansion?

Ahhh, yes! You have an enabler! Makes me wish I didn't work remotely!

(A couple years and 30lbs later...)

"I'm positive no one is ordering too much food for the meetings..."

Many companies have drastically cut food budgets: travel allowances, craft services, company cafe subsidies, etc. It’s all about getting “lean and mean”, the polar opposite of “fat and happy”.

Yet you are blowing up from a steady stream of corporate calories. Someone powerful must be resisting the pressure to downsize your food supply. Surely, the powers that be have noticed you outgrowing your clothes. If the food stays plentiful then they desire your fattening to continue.

As you sit in your office, glutted from consuming the massive cake, you hear the elevator open and a maintenance worker exits, wheeling a very large box toward the break room. You sneak a glance as he unlocks a door in the back of the room and proceeds to open a walk in refrigerator. He then unpacks the box, unloading half a dozen two sheet cakes like the one you just ate, plus plate after plate of brownies you’ve been consuming, plates of sandwiches, etc. Mentally, you try to estimate the total calories he has unloaded. Must be enough food to feed 30 people for a week. Yet based on the last two days you know you could polish it all off in a month, eating 15,000 calories/day.

You stay late at the Office to finish your monthly report. Without break room food you are so hungry it hurts. Then you hear the elevator open again, and another huge box is wheeled out. You realize that this is the monthly food delivery. You must have eaten half of it last month… in your head you try to calculate the calories: at least 200,000 over 4 weeks, 7000+ calories/day. No wonder you went up 3 pants sizes!

One of the things I miss working virtually