General

It’s more and more seeming like peoples kink brain is leading the conversation and no one is actually looking for a real conversation or connection? Don’t get me wrong I get that we are here bc of a common interest but I would imagine a lot of people want to find someone real to share it with? Maybe I’m wrong, lmk your guys thoughts.

Well it’s kinda complicated.

Sure there are some people who are open for a conversation and have a more connection. Especially when it comes to properly getting to know someone and talking about other stuff outside the community which is pretty great!

However most people on here are normally here for business purposes or just snort up the gallery of photos and videos.

There were times when I have fell victim to some individuals who took advantage of my kindness to have me send money when I didn’t want to because I don’t know them very well.

So… yeah while it is possible to find a connection with someone on here, but it’s like many other platforms to meet people where you have to be careful with who you talk to. Because you never know what some people will use them for.

we need more mods and admins to clean up the trash.

Oof. Sorry that happened, mate.

But I agree; people want different things out of this community. Just have to keep shooting your shot, IMO.

Well, I get what OP is saying, but I don't find it to be that big of an issue. It's more or less what I expected when registering here: Many users mainly want to get off, and I don't think it's a problem as long as they always respect other's people boundaries.

Nevertheless, as @Kacchan has said, there's undoubtely some people here who have a lot of conversation beyond fat chat. Some of them are among the most frequent posters. If you look for long enough, I guarantee you'll find someone to talk to who's more in line with what you are looking for!

to answer your original thread question, it really starts with stuff outside of the community in general. If an individual enters it without respect for themselves or others, and is not held accountable for that, it will permeate.

I think in general people rush into the sexual aspects of a relationship before really getting to know each other no matter what their kinks are (or not?). Instant gratification is out of control (in general, everything takes to long-dow loads, microwaves, bullet trains, etc) and it's taking a toll on the dating world. Put into that perspective I doubt there are really more incidents of people leading with the lizard brain on here than in the general populations dating scene.

Instant gratification? I kind of know what you mean. But at the same time, do you want to waste time only to find out something where you know it will never work?

I do have a list of must-haves, and I think most others do too, but I try to keep my list short and reasonable.

For example, if she's not open to having kids, I need to know that as soon as possible. Because if not, a long-term exclusive relationship isn't possible.

Kind of what foreverffa said, it isn't nessasairly bad to check if your sexually compatible first and learn more personality stuff afterwards. Especially so when many who come here have very particular dos and do nots in relationships.
Like if you pair a hardcore feeder with someone who has no intention of gaining, your just as borked as two socially incompatable people.
Food for thought mayhaps.