ForeverFFA:
I feel the need to update this thread because I'm sort of struggling all over again just when I thought I had reached a happy conclusion.
It feels like my fat fetish is not really welcome in my relationship after all, as if my boyfriend would rather pretend it doesn't exist. He hasn't brought it up once since our initial discussions but has instead made offhand remarks about fat being unhealthy and has continued to talk negatively about his own and others' bodies (for being "too" fat). I'm wondering if I should approach a renewed discussion with him after all this? And how?
My fetish isn't going away, and I feel like I can't live as my whole, authentic self with this silence. I'm also confused, based on his initial reaction being much more positive.
I guess the question to me is what do you want this relationship to be, or where would you see it going if the kink compatibility was different?
If you see it as just a fling, then maybe it has run its course and you should think about moving on.
On the other hand, if this is someone you could see yourself being with for a long time, I personally put 100% sexual compatibility down the list behind an awful lot of other qualities and values. I could see someone changing their mind on body positivity, or coming around to your way of thinking on what’s sexy long before their opinions change on children, careers, commitment, housekeeping priorities, politics, etc….
And even if they never warm up to fat fetishism, those other qualities might be more important in that long term partner. Or not!
I know I had to make that choice, and I’m happy I stuck with the person I connected with in those other aspects of our relationship, but I’m just one person with one story.
