Fat experiences

Happy new year everyone, hope you y'all had a great start

I'm kinda stuck right now real sorry to start a topic


I've been gaining again quite fast, an 4lb this whole week which I love and dearly want to be fatter, but some are sturborny against IT

My family, dad is the worst....

My gf now lives at my family's house same as me and she's been keeping real fed and real stuffed which is lovely and all, but my dad actually became an quite raging, well quite an dealbreaker, even my brother plays the rule kinda.

He commented on my weight how fat i've gotten and he doesn't like that not at all

That my gf is fault, that he cares for me and my health and such and all but...

He said it's unhealthly cuz my asthma (ofc I know that ;- it's getting out of hand and I don't get a job, cuz fat is ugly as he said and so on.... That I gained alot and he's that and blah .

I was pissed af

I did stand up for myself and said it's my body, my life and my choice and he can't force me to lose weight etc. He said no I can, I said no you cannot , then he said it's my rules at my house. The discussion went about an hour.

I have asthma, yes, it's moderate and not severe , it got actually better, before the 2rd COVID caught up on me.. I weight alot ofc, but that doesn't mean i'm ugly nor that. It's my life , it's all quite complicated and all and kinda scared to at my doc's what they're gonna say..
I don't want to lose weight and I hate IT sm they're bringing up, I want to speak up and say nah i'm not interested etc.

Just cuz you're fat, doesn't mean you can't get a job... Here in germany, there are lots of fat people working , he's also kinda fatphobic same as my brother.

I want to gain, but all that kinda gets me stuck

I don't have neither have HBP, T2D or something obesity issues related... I just "Love" to eat and get fatter.

Hope someone can help a bit :/

Let me start by saying, I am sorry you have to go through this. I have lived with parental disapproval for as long as I can remember, oddly, not about my size, but because I don't otherwise fit their expectation of what a "good girl" does with her life. They envisioned a life in which I majored in something traditionally acceptable for women, like teaching or nursing. They wanted me to find a "good man from a good family" and marry him right out of college. They wanted me to remain active in the very traditional, conservative religion in which I was brought up. I didn't do any of those things in that order. They've been displeased ever since.

That said, regardless of "whose roof" you live under, no one... and I mean no one... has control of your body except you. Expressing concern is one thing. I am sure there are people who care about me who really wish I wasn't 500 lb. And honestly, some of their concerns are probably legitimate. I have had one or two people say, "I hope you're going to the doctor regularly." I'm at higher risk for diabetes, I have high blood pressure, I get short of breath. I get it.

But NO ONE has authority over your body-- and living on their real estate doesn't change that. Another person cannot *make you* gain weight, lose weight, color your hair, get Botox, join a gym, you name it. Even in a Sub-Dom romantic relationship, consent must still undergird EVERYTHING. Otherwise, the deal is off.

I don't have specific advice for you regarding your father, but I hope you feel empowered to have control over your own body. I suppose he could do something like restrict your access to food he buys. You should still feel empowered to buy your own food and feed your body in the way you find appropriate.

As for the jobs argument-- There may be professions a super obese person might not be physically able to do. You don't seem to fall in that category yet. But there are also hundreds of professions your physical fitness and your size have absolutely no impact on. Please don't believe the 'no one will hire you' scare tactic. It's simply not true. I have an excellent job, primarily work remotely, and make a good income way above the median. I'm just as competent at it at 500 lb as I was at 200 lb, because they hired my brain, not my body.

I truly do wish you all the best, and I hope you do what's best for YOU, rather than what someone else thinks you should do.

Thank you soo much for the reply!! This means real alot to me.

I'm also really sorry for you, you had to deal with it. It's real a pain If the parents are family side is against you, as their believes as you mentioned varies... It's get tough sometimes, what you mentioned some of these are my dad's Insights. :/ it saddens, but you cannot change someones views etc.


I feel safer and empowered now to know, I have full control over my body and I can decide. It's my body and If I want to BE fat, so be IT. Just I wasn't sure If I was right and my statements were accurate. But I knew that somebody cannot shape their ideal person as they wish.

The remarks on health are actually not a problem, I know the risks and such and while they're concerned, they shouldn't force me to change over my head. And on the doc's side, I want to actually to say i'm not interested in losing weight, but i'm kinda scared the reactions. I know what i'm doing and I know he maybe concerned, but it's my life.


Yeah I agree with the job's argument fully. I find just real nerving to hear, that he thinks that fat people don't get a job due being fat and being fat = ugly which it's nonsense... I know fairly quite fat people who are well employed and see lots of folks who are fat and working, I don't understand him. Fat isn't ugly I find it beautiful and always will.

I really thank you for the reply and the helpful advices and tips, this made my day and actually, I will never forget this, this helps me sm and I wish you all the best and luck in life and I will continue to gain weight my desire I know this IS what I want.

Thank you again and I wish you a good day and happy start

Your dad needs to touch grass. Smoke some grass. Something. Because all of this is out of pocket and wrong.

Being fat doesn't mean being ugly. And either of them isn't a barrier to getting a job. And unless there's proof your weight is causing you health complications, he doesn't have grounds to be worried.

My mom used to do something similar. She fat-shamed me for not wanting to be underweight and would often threaten to kick me out for not being what she wanted me to be.

Stressful af

The solution to this is two-fold.

The first thing you need to do is work on your independence. Easier said than done in this economy. But the less you need to rely on them, the less power they can claim to have over you.

The second thing you need to do is set boundaries for yourself. Get all the allies you can. Bonus points if it's someone who can throw some weight around. You can start small and work your way up if you are more comfortable that way. But don't be afraid to use the nuclear option.

Remember your dad is doing this as a twisted form of love and care. In his mind, this is the best way he can think of to show you love. He's just very, very wrong about everything. If he's willing to listen about how his way of loving you hurts you, then you can work with this.

If that doesn't work, use the nuclear option.

No one can judge what you want or what makes you happy but yourself. There are big people with health problems and skinny people with health problems look at Flo Jo the Olympic champion who died of heart failure the point I am making is no matter the praise or the cruel remarks it is you that must decide what makes you happy going thru life listening to everyone else and giving in to their desire will do nothing but make them happy and keep you miserable. You and only you know what is best for you so always do you

Thank you all for the advices and helpful tips, I really needed it and now I know how to handle all this with those amazing advices and I feel empowered to know it's my body, my LIFE.

I feel sometimes quite unsure and ashamed to bring such topics, i'm still young and this whole of it as seen as a fetish, it is for me not a fetish, more like a attraction and whole of it. I still learn alot from it, and it get's better and better which I dearly love.


Y'all really helped me and i'm real thankful for this, even my dad made a small remark again i'm getting fatter, still I have in mind that nobody can change me, just myself. I just ignore him, just his some of his scare-tactics are aren't gonna stop me.


I will do these options and advices and have a backdoor open to be safe.


Thank you all and have all a great day ! ❤️

I feel for you, my father used to comment on my weight and make me feel really shitty about it. I remember falling asleep on the couch and waking up to hear him chastising my mom for giving me a large piece of cake saying do you want him to be bigger? I was around 330 then.
That was around 5 years ago, he and my mom got divorced shortly after and he hasn’t commented since around them and I’m much bigger now so people do change so hopefully your dad will and stop saying things and respect you for who you are.