General

Nature versus nurture?

I’ve known about my feederism fetish since age 4. I have always wondered if it came more from Nature or Nuture. I had loving Mother who was overweight and didn’t diet, but that’s about it. It didn’t seem like enough for me to develop a full blown feederism fetish when it comes to external factors. It would be cool to know how fetishes like these form. smiley
11 months

Nature versus nurture?

PositiveFA:
I’ve known about my feederism fetish since age 4. I have always wondered if it came more from Nature or Nuture. I had loving Mother who was overweight and didn’t diet, but that’s about it. It didn’t seem like enough for me to develop a full blown feederism fetish when it comes to external factors. It would be cool to know how fetishes like these form. smiley


I love this topic, and I think the answer is, it varies from person to person. Some people are influenced by family lifestyle, others initially start eating as a trauma response or for comfort, and then there are those of us who just, well, love fat.

In my case, I'm a fat person in a thin to average sized family. I remember being very very small, before kindergarten, and loving cartoons where a character ate a lot or visibly ballooned up. I was also chubby by the time I was three or four, and I remember people commenting on my fat cheeks and pot belly. By first grade, my mother was pushing healthy snacks only, but my father was a little more lenient. Still, I wasn't exactly pigging out, because where would a 6-year-old get access to tons of extra food? Nevertheless, I started to get properly fat, and by 4th grade I could no longer fit in the school desks. I also remember the issue being raised at my pediatrician's office, and he just treated it as an issue of eating too much and playing too little.

I will add, I've always had a proclivity to being sedentary. Sports or physical activity didn't interest me. I liked to write, draw, and I loved movies. Not exactly burning a bunch of calories.

By 3rd and 4th grade, I started to stash household snacks in my bedroom, and that's when I really put on weight. I hit 200 before 8th grade, and in high school, I went up to 300 lb.

Interestingly, teasing as a fat kid didn't bother me. Classmates would comment that I tired out more quickly in PE, that I had a big tummy, or that I had gained weight over the summer. I knew all of those things were true, so I didn't really perceive the teasing as an insult. I think the fact that I didn't react negatively meant I didn't get teased a whole lot. There was no payoff to anyone who wanted to make fun of me.

In high school, I also started exploring the internet. I lurked on this site as a guest before I was old enough to join. I looked at pictures, read A LOT of fiction, and usually stuffed my belly while I was doing it. I also got a part time job, meaning I had money to satisfy my appetite. Then there was college, when I could eat whatever I wanted, when I wanted. This was when I decided I would one day become not just fat, but super obese. It's also when I had my first real feedee experience.

I said all this to say, there was nothing about my upbringing that would have overtly encouraged this lifestyle. My interests also predated the knowledge there could be anything sexual about eating and gaining. I'd definitely have to say it's nature for me.
11 months

Nature versus nurture?

PositiveFA:
I’ve known about my feederism fetish since age 4. I have always wondered if it came more from Nature or Nuture. I had loving Mother who was overweight and didn’t diet, but that’s about it. It didn’t seem like enough for me to develop a full blown feederism fetish when it comes to external factors. It would be cool to know how fetishes like these form. smiley


Mine was nurture.

I'm a black woman born and raised in the South. In my culture, we believe that when you love your man, you feed him well. I remember joking around with my grandma about this one day when I told her how much I love to cook. She told me that if I love to cook so much, then my future husband will be happy and well fed.

Then she told me that I better get me a big man because not every guy likes to eat.

Initially, I preferred big men in general. Muscular, fat, somewhere in between - didn't matter. But over time, I noticed that muscular men tended to use food as fuel while fat men tended to take a more hedonistic approach. The latter seemed more enjoyable than the former to feed.

On top of all that, fat men feel nicer than leaner men.
11 months

Nature versus nurture?

It’s a little bit of both for me. Many of my family and relatives are on the bigger side, some are fine with it, others were trying to lose on and off. So there is definitely a genetic/nature component to my size. I have also always admired fat people and considered them more attractive as long as I can remember. As a child, I always wanted to grow up to be a fat adult. Due to personal issues of both my parents at the time, I lived with one of my aunts in my preteens and early teens. She’s always been a large woman and more than happy to provide lots of food to her family. This is where some of the nurture comes in: while living with her, I learned to appreciate large meals and developed a big appetite.
11 months

Nature versus nurture?

PositiveFA:
I’ve known about my feederism fetish since age 4. I have always wondered if it came more from Nature or Nuture. I had loving Mother who was overweight and didn’t diet, but that’s about it. It didn’t seem like enough for me to develop a full blown feederism fetish when it comes to external factors. It would be cool to know how fetishes like these form. smiley

BigBallBellyGirl:
I love this topic, and I think the answer is, it varies from person to person. Some people are influenced by family lifestyle, others initially start eating as a trauma response or for comfort, and then there are those of us who just, well, love fat.

In my case, I'm a fat person in a thin to average sized family. I remember being very very small, before kindergarten, and loving cartoons where a character ate a lot or visibly ballooned up. I was also chubby by the time I was three or four, and I remember people commenting on my chubby cheeks and pot belly. By first grade, my mother was pushing healthy snacks only, but my father was a little more lenient. Still, I wasn't exactly pigging out, because where would a 6-year-old get access to tons of extra food? Nevertheless, I started to get properly fat, and by 4th grade I could no longer fit in the school desks. I also remember the issue being raised at my pediatrician's office, and he just treated it as an issue of eating too much and playing too little.

I will add, I've always had a proclivity to being sedentary. Sports or physical activity didn't interest me. I liked to write, draw, and I loved movies. Exactly burning a bunch of calories.

By 3rd and 4th grade, I started to stash household snacks in my bedroom, and that's whenI really put on weight. I hit 200 before 8th grade, and in high school, I went up to 300 lb.

Interestingly, teasing as a fat kid didn't bother me. Classmates would comment that I tired out more quickly in PE, that I had a big tummy, or that I had gained weight over the summer. I knew all of those things were true, so I didn't really perceive the teasing as an insult. I think the fact that I didn't react negatively meant I didn't get teased a whole lot. There was no payoff to anyone who wanted to make fun of me.

In high school, I also started exploring the internet. I lurked on this site as a guest before I was old enough to join. I looked at pictures, read A LOT of fiction, and usually stuffed my belly while I was doing it. I also got a part time job, meaning I had money to satisfy my appetite. Then there was college, when I could eat whatever I wanted, when I wanted. This was when I decided I would one day become not just fat, but super obese. It's also when I had my first real feedee experience.

I said all this to say, there was nothing about my upbringing that would have overtly encouraged this lifestyle. My interests also predated the knowledge there could be anything about eating and gaining. I'd definitely have to say it's nature for me.


Thank you for sharing your personal experiences! I’m “HEAVILY” (pun intended) inclined to perceive “Nature” as more in my direction. I think my brain hit the very uncommon feederism switch. I don’t know ANY family who could have possibly had such a fetish.
11 months

Nature versus nurture?

Expeng:
I also really like this topic, but I'm definitely somewhere between nature and nurture here.

On one hand, like half of my family growing up was in the overweight to obese range, so I was "exposed" to it pretty regularly. But being larger was never seen as a positive thing, especially by my mom, so it was definitely in my nature as well. At some point in second grade, I remember looking around at the larger members of my family and thinking something like, "If they can be fat, why can't I?" I remember sneaking spoonfuls of sugar on occasion in an attempt to gain weight. I remember thinking about writing "weight gain tips" around the same time as well, despite at the time not having any clue it was something anyone except myself was interested in... plus, I was in second grade, so it's not like I was an expert on the matter or anything lol.

Around late middle school/early high school, I discovered the wonders of the world wide web. I read stories on this site actually on multiple occasions, and I found gainers on YouTube that I would watch literally just to watch. I remember 8th grade was the time I fully realized and accepted that I really like fat girls. On top of that, I kind of did this weird thing where I would wear an old pair of jeans with a click button under my pajama pants at home. The jeans were tight on account of me still growing, but I loved being able to expand my stomach a little bit and just pop the button.

These days, I still get sudden urges to just start gaining weight again and again, but several things hold me back from committing. The thought of getting questioned on it constantly is something I'd dread to deal with, for starters. But also, I still hold a subtle negative bias on how fat looks on myself. That's a significant part of the reason on why I decided to make an account here in the first place. Further normalize the idea of fat so I can learn to accept myself at any size.

Whoa, that went a bit off-topic. Anyway, I guess to summarize, nature and nurture both played a hand in my journey here.


Intriguing! Thank you for sharing!
11 months

Nature versus nurture?

PositiveFA:
I’ve known about my feederism fetish since age 4. I have always wondered if it came more from Nature or Nuture. I had loving Mother who was overweight and didn’t diet, but that’s about it. It didn’t seem like enough for me to develop a full blown feederism fetish when it comes to external factors. It would be cool to know how fetishes like these form. smiley

Munchies:
Mine was nurture.

I'm a black woman born and raised in the South. In my culture, we believe that when you love your man, you feed him well. I remember joking around with my grandma about this one day when I told her how much I love to cook. She told me that if I love to cook so much, then my future husband will be happy and well fed.

Then she told me that I better get me a big man because not every guy likes to eat.

Initially, I preferred big men in general. Muscular, fat, somewhere in between - didn't matter. But over time, I noticed that muscular men tended to use food as fuel while fat men tended to take a more hedonistic approach. The latter seemed more enjoyable than the former to feed.

On top of all that, fat men feel nicer than leaner men.


Nice! 🙂
11 months

Nature versus nurture?

Bigdoug:
It’s a little bit of both for me. Many of my family and relatives are on the bigger side, some are fine with it, others were trying to lose on and off. So there is definitely a genetic/nature component to my size. I have also always admired fat people and considered them more attractive as long as I can remember. As a child, I always wanted to grow up to be a fat adult. Due to personal issues of both my parents at the time, I lived with one of my aunts in my preteens and early teens. She’s always been a large woman and more than happy to provide lots of food to her family. This is where some of the nurture comes in: while living with her, I learned to appreciate large meals and developed a big appetite.


Nurture can definitely enhance the nature of fetishes I’m sure. 🙂
11 months

Nature versus nurture?

For me I think it's a bit of both. As a child, fat people just rubbed me a certain way, wasn't sure if it was positive or negative. In elementary school I'd draw cartoons of fat people and occasionally I'd stuff pillows up my shirt and just fantasize about being fat. Definitely remember that Violet Beauregarde inflation blueberry scene from Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory! It really stirred me every time I watched it.

As an early teen I just had this curiosity or attraction or whatever to fat bodies. Wasn't sure why or what it was and really just repressed it. At age 16 one day I got the idea to look up "fat people" videos on YouTube which led me to BBW vids. One thing I knew is that I really enjoyed those vids. It felt pleasurable but also simultaneously disgusting and wrong. I spent years being guilty and conflicted, really hating myself for it. Only more recently I realized that it's not going away so I had better embrace and manage it.

Pretty much everyone in my family was slim growing up. My mom told me that when she was dating my dad, he told her to never get fat. Recently he was watching TV and the Ozempic commercial came on. He's like "Ugh, look at that ugly woman. She's so fat! I hate this commercial." He always used to bring it up every time there was a fat person on TV. Yeah, my dad definitely has some fat fear, or maybe he's secretly in denial, since he's always been a greedy eater. He likes buffets, always takes extra this, extra that. But it's ironic that he never really gained weight! Not that much anyway. Must have a fast metabolism or skinny genes or whatever.

My mom is super health-conscious and an expert on organic, whole-grain, omega-3s, etc. Low-fat, low-salt, low-sugar, not eating processed meats or red meat, only eating salmon or anchovies instead of larger fish because they contain less mercury content, etc. It's definitely great to be health-informed. But this is a constant source of argument between my parents, to this day. My dad always wants more butter, more cheese, ice cream and pie every time he can get a chance. And my mom yells at him for it.

So yeah.
11 months

Nature versus nurture?

For as long as I can remember, I was always fascinated with fat.I remember watching the music video for Weird Al's parody of bad called Fat, and seeing all the fat people and Weird Al in a fat suit did something lol. After that I would start to stuff my shirt with pillows and I remember my younger sister and cousins doing this too. Maybe they were just following my lead since I was older. Anyways I also loved seeing cartoon characters get fat, I even somewhat remember bringing up the topic of fat when I was young since I guess I told my mom I wanted to be fat, since she tried to explain to me that being fat was bad. In my child mind I thought if you got too fat you would explode and that's why it was "bad".

Fast forward to when I was a teenager and hitting puberty I started to gain weight because I was super hungry all the time. I remember I mistakenly mentioned again that I wanted to be fat, and my parents weren't happy with that response. They tried scaring me into not wanting to get fat by talking about my best friend's sister who was very obese, and how she would have to go to the hospital here and there. My grandmother would bring me over to her house after school and have me run on her treadmill to lose the weight I gained after hitting puberty. Then when I joined FF in 2010, I started to purposely gain weight and I gained about 30 lbs not long after I joined the community. I remember my grandmother wanted to gift me a gym membership for Christmas lol, I obviously didn't take that offer. Needless to say I've always had a thing for fat, not really sure how it came to be. I have a few bigger people in my family but not many people in my family are big. I assume it's just nature for me, there's something about fat that just feels good. Not only does it turn me on, it just feels right to be bigger and I'm not even 100% near the right size yet. (But I'm not too actively gaining right now since I want to get top surgery. I just have to find the right surgeon that can operate on people with a bmi of over 40...)
11 months
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