Fat experiences

Feedee regret

Morbidly A Beast:
Content Creators are Toxic for the parasocial aspect it sends mixed signals to people who probably don’t know better, but it really isn’t the creators fault but like it isn’t said enough I feel like. But I also think sex work is real work. Big brain.

BigBallBellyGirl:
Agreed! I'd say that content creation is absolutely valid entrepreneurship, and I certainly respect people who are able to make it profitable. I think the danger is when people assume everyone on the site wants to put out content and is somehow not participating appropriately in the community if they are not doing so. As fat people, we don't exist for others' gratification. We exist as whole humans, all by ourselves, with the right to be active here and in any other space we choose in whatever way we choose.


I think people, especially in America but in other places too, are much more selfish and much more... stupid, than that (i have a theory of stupidity but its gonna be too much to write it here), and i mean that litteraly. Not to offend, these are just the words that describe what im trying to say. From their point of view they see they cant find a partner the way they expect or desire to. They then indentify this as a problem. Instantly, the ideological narative of individualism kicks in and puts it as "Its either my fault or their fault" which might already be false, and of course entitled people almost always automatically assume that "its not my fault" without ever giving it proper thought. And then they are angry at other individuals, like being mad at someone will fix any problem.

Also, one question i have about what you write, what is "valid enterprenuership"? Is there a kind of enterprenuership that is not valid?
2 years

Feedee regret

Munchies
WOW nicely said.
2 years

Feedee regret

I would much rather the people who are online to make money have their own site. There's nothing worse than a feedee coming on to you like they like you, and then asks for money. Of course, with me being 73, I know anyone coming on to me is likely looking for money.
2 years

Feedee regret

Johnxyz:
I would much rather the people who are online to make money have their own site. There's nothing worse than a feedee coming on to you like they like you, and then asks for money. Of course, with me being 73, I know anyone coming on to me is likely looking for money.


Yeah, that's shitty of them.
2 years

Feedee regret

Johnxyz:
I would much rather the people who are online to make money have their own site. There's nothing worse than a feedee coming on to you like they like you, and then asks for money. Of course, with me being 73, I know anyone coming on to me is likely looking for money.


Isn't that just life, though? I know, big philosophical question, but every person place and thing is trying to sell you something, right? I'm trying to sell you something, check out my profile and buy an upgrade account to read my dirty book.

Your alternative, though, a site with no people asking you for money, would probably just be a site where nobody talked to you, because of your age. Would that be better? People who are on here to find a romantic partner are not looking for 73 year olds. There are websites specifically for older people to find romantic partners.

I'm also double confused, cause I've been on this site under different names since the very beginning and I've never-not-even-once been hit up for money. The whole thing is bizarre.
2 years

Feedee regret

Johnxyz:
I would much rather the people who are online to make money have their own site. There's nothing worse than a feedee coming on to you like they like you, and then asks for money. Of course, with me being 73, I know anyone coming on to me is likely looking for money.

Letters And Numbers:
Isn't that just life, though? I know, big philosophical question, but every person place and thing is trying to sell you something, right? I'm trying to sell you something, check out my profile and buy an upgrade account to read my dirty book.

Your alternative, though, a site with no people asking you for money, would probably just be a site where nobody talked to you, because of your age. Would that be better? People who are on here to find a romantic partner are not looking for 73 year olds. There are websites specifically for older people to find romantic partners.

I'm also double confused, cause I've been on this site under different names since the very beginning and I've never-not-even-once been hit up for money. The whole thing is bizarre.


It comes down to how gender roles work. Men are seen as inherently providers, and feeders are seen as a masculine role. So men in general will have people asking them for money - especially male feeders. However, feeders in general get asked for money too. I'm a woman, and I get the occasional ask/demand for money. Usually they backpedal once they realize I'm a woman too.

It's weird.

But yeah. Women like that have bought into the patriarchal lie that men are providers and women will be provided for so long as they satisfy male urges.

This is extremely dangerous because when they come across someone who subscribes to that ideology too, that person tends to be abusive. This is why such women tend not to stay very long in the community assuming they don't get banned.
2 years

Feedee regret

Johnxyz:
I would much rather the people who are online to make money have their own site. There's nothing worse than a feedee coming on to you like they like you, and then asks for money. Of course, with me being 73, I know anyone coming on to me is likely looking for money.

Letters And Numbers:
Isn't that just life, though? I know, big philosophical question, but every person place and thing is trying to sell you something, right? I'm trying to sell you something, check out my profile and buy an upgrade account to read my dirty book.

Your alternative, though, a site with no people asking you for money, would probably just be a site where nobody talked to you, because of your age. Would that be better? People who are on here to find a romantic partner are not looking for 73 year olds. There are websites specifically for older people to find romantic partners.

I'm also double confused, cause I've been on this site under different names since the very beginning and I've never-not-even-once been hit up for money. The whole thing is bizarre.

Munchies:
It comes down to how gender roles work. Men are seen as inherently providers, and feeders are seen as a masculine role. So men in general will have people asking them for money - especially male feeders. However, feeders in general get asked for money too. I'm a woman, and I get the occasional ask/demand for money. Usually they backpedal once they realize I'm a woman too.

It's weird.

But yeah. Women like that have bought into the patriarchal lie that men are providers and women will be provided for so long as they satisfy male urges.

This is extremely dangerous because when they come across someone who subscribes to that ideology too, that person tends to be abusive. This is why such women tend not to stay very long in the community assuming they don't get banned.


I think for as much as many of us will vociferously protest, many of us treat this site and this larger community as an extension of the pornography world. So while it might be a hangout spot just like a social club some of the time, it's a social club where people sneak off to masturbate constantly and they also like to talk about what they masturbate to and complain about things and then masturbate again. And I think this leads many people, men and women, buyers and sellers, to internalize that it's a series of transactional relationships.

I don't even know if that's so different from going to any other website, or any real bar or social club, except that people have lower inhibitions here and everyone is aware what everyone else wants to pay for. There are few secrets.

But if I was trying to meet someone IRL and get them to essentially gratify my fetish, I could use my charm and wit and good looks. That and paying them some money might get me what I'm looking for. And then there's Fantasy Feeder.
2 years

Feedee regret

Letters And Numbers:
I think for as much as many of us will vociferously protest, many of us treat this site and this larger community as an extension of the pornography world. So while it might be a hangout spot just like a social club some of the time, it's a social club where people sneak off to masturbate constantly and they also like to talk about what they masturbate to and complain about things and then masturbate again. And I think this leads many people, men and women, buyers and sellers, to internalize that it's a series of transactional relationships.

I don't even know if that's so different from going to any other website, or any real bar or social club, except that people have lower inhibitions here and everyone is aware what everyone else wants to pay for. There are few secrets.

But if I was trying to meet someone IRL and get them to essentially gratify my fetish, I could use my charm and wit and good looks. That and paying them some money might get me what I'm looking for. And then there's Fantasy Feeder.


Pretty much
2 years

Feedee regret

Johnxyz:
I would much rather the people who are online to make money have their own site. There's nothing worse than a feedee coming on to you like they like you, and then asks for money. Of course, with me being 73, I know anyone coming on to me is likely looking for money.

Its a very hard thing to do that because capitalism is sooo good at infultrating into new areas. Thats why in places they have explicit rules to prevent that. Yet that is trying to sail against the flow, and these rules are often bypassed.

The only way to trully stop that, i think, is by kind of brute forcing it. That requires an ideology, that the overwhelming magority of the users can and would have to subscribe to, and that ideology should be something like "Comercialization is bad, we shouldnt do or allow it here, in order to for this community to flourish, as a community!“

But thats not gonna happen...
2 years

Feedee regret

Morbidly A Beast:
Content Creators are Toxic for the parasocial aspect it sends mixed signals to people who probably don’t know better, but it really isn’t the creators fault but like it isn’t said enough I feel like. But I also think sex work is real work. Big brain.

BigBallBellyGirl:
Agreed! I'd say that content creation is absolutely valid entrepreneurship, and I certainly respect people who are able to make it profitable. I think the danger is when people assume everyone on the site wants to put out content and is somehow not participating appropriately in the community if they are not doing so. As fat people, we don't exist for others' gratification. We exist as whole humans, all by ourselves, with the right to be active here and in any other space we choose in whatever way we choose.

Enas:
I think people, especially in America but in other places too, are much more selfish and much more... stupid, than that (i have a theory of stupidity but its gonna be too much to write it here), and i mean that litteraly. Not to offend, these are just the words that describe what im trying to say. From their point of view they see they cant find a partner the way they expect or desire to. They then indentify this as a problem. Instantly, the ideological narative of individualism kicks in and puts it as "Its either my fault or their fault" which might already be false, and of course entitled people almost always automatically assume that "its not my fault" without ever giving it proper thought. And then they are angry at other individuals, like being mad at someone will fix any problem.

Also, one question i have about what you write, what is "valid enterprenuership"? Is there a kind of enterprenuership that is not valid?


That's a good question, and honestly, I'm not entirely sure how to answer that. I think I'm pushing back against misconceptions that visual content creation somehow makes a person less authentic because they're "in it for the money". My point was that I applaud people who are able to monetize. It's just not what all overweight people on these sites are looking for.

I wasn't quite able to fully close the loop on that thought, but I hope that makes some sense.
2 years
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