General

Lately I've been super lonely and just not feeling okay mentally. a lot of my “friends” have told me that I need to try to make friends. Most would think that a 23-year-old would have some sort of social life but honestly I don’t. I’ve been chatting with people and having basic conversation and such but eventually it just dies off. And when I text them every other day it just makes me feel like I’m a bother. of course everyone is busy/ have their own life. But for some odd reason I get offended when seeing them online and actively chatting in groups. I feel like saying that makes me feel narcissistic or selfish. But if I didn’t want to talk to someone, I would tell them. Idk man. And then me being a feedee it gets so boring when I have no one to send pictures and stuff too or talk about things with. I do it for my own pleasure sure but it just gets so depressing when the only time someone messages you is to basically “get off” on “chatting”. I mean I’m not judging but where is the “ Hi how are you?” 😂 does anyone else feel like this?

I’m older than you, but one of the highlights of my week is getting out to a writing group and being social, and that’s not the same thing as hanging out with friend friends, but they’re still my writing group friends and it’s a lot of fun.

The catch is that it’s an activity I need to take a positive action to do. It doesn’t come to me, I can’t do it from my couch, I have to plan it and do it and get out of the house. Sometimes I don’t want to. It was a busy day/I’m feeling sad/I’m tired/I’m nervous. I try not to let those be excuses and I get out of the house. I’m always happy when I do. I’ve never once said “I wish I hadn’t done that”. Sometimes when I’ve skipped I’ve regretted it the next day.

So, plan a scheme to get out of the house! Make a date with a friend. Go to your local library’s website and see what activities they run. I guarantee you there are a ton of them and they’re free. Maybe you’ll find a new hobby or meet new people. It’s tough at first, but you get over that part really fast.

Thanks so much! ❤️❤️ I’m going to look into some of that now.

my advice would be to get out and do stuff find a hobby learn a skill etc don’t let the internet be your only gateway to human interaction. It’s okay to be alone sometimes.

My mom used to say "If you want to have friends, show yourself as one."

Put yourself out there. If you don't have a hobby, get one. You can bond with people over shared interests. And if it's a group thing, you can make friends through that.

For example, if you like reading, check out your local library for upcoming events and programs. A lot of them are probably free, and some of them might not be book related. I know my local library has movie nights, knitting, and arts and crafts. I made soap once. It was fun.

Then, since you want to have friends on FF, talk about these interests by making a post or replying to a prexisting one. You can also be more active in gen chat too. It's best to be an active participant in public settings so people know what kind of person you are. It makes finding friends a lot easier.

yeah i really relate. i’m a feedee with no feeder so it’s incredibly lonely and fakes keep wasting my time and getting my hopes up.

I think a lot of 20-somethings these days are feeling lonely, you're definitely not alone there. Ironically with the advent of social media, it feels like socializing is harder than ever. Like others have said, even a single outing a week can go a long way in fighting that feeling.

I'm lucky to have a partner but even then if I didn't have my bi-weekly D&D sessions to look forward to I'd still feel pretty dang lonely.