General

I got some personal experience from an ex of mine from another forum. They vented on how hard it was to find a dating site where they could find bigger people, and publically invited people to chat with them. I was just throwing the dice for fun, but turns out I was the safest of the suitors and they wanted to give me a chance.

We used VRchat as an icebreaker, and although I wasn't fat myself, we basically used to LARP being a mutually fat couple in private. Although they were cool if I didn't gain weight, we found out our tolerances were around 350 lbs (chunky but not immobile) so I humored bulking up to 30 lbs for them at first (we didn't get far). We even had a bit of ERP where I was solely the fat guy and I personally got to hear how into it they were. Although we had a lot in common, there were too many logistic problems and we had to break up early. Totally worth it, imo.

Do women like this? Yes. Can they cut you some slack? Yes. Is it easier to stay together once you find each other? Probably not.

I ain't found any, tbf,

As a female feeder who lives in a culture where women overfeed their husbands and boyfriends, I find this very interesting.

You and I have been on FF for about the same time. I've run into female feeders, mutual gainers, and feedees who prefer bigger men. Sometimes, they even loudly announce it.

I've even seen entire forum threads about feedees who say they prefer me who are bigger because they tend to make better feeders.

With peace and love, are you struggling to find women who are attracted to fat men or are you having issues finding a woman that wants to be in a relationship with you? These are two different struggles with two different solutions.

Finding a lady, there is plenty of fake don't find many for real that just like a larger guy, especially off the peg pre-fattened

It sounds like you aren't talking about struggling to find people who find you attractive. It sounds like you are looking for a relationship.

Is that a fair assumption?

I am very curious as to the people you are hanging around.

Fat men and AMABs can get it. Even outside the kink, they can get it. A lot of them end up in happy, fulfilling relationships.

And yeah, fatphobes of all stripes exist, but I'm shocked you think women and AFABs have better protection than men and AMABs in this regard. Society says some of the most deplorable things about women's bodies. In fact, a woman who isn't overweight but has a bit of a belly is called all kinds of horrible things. This is compounded if she's a POCs, disabled, a mother, etc

This is not to say that men don't experience fatphobia. They do. I've seen some really vile shit that no one should even endure. However, you need to understand the difference in society between men and women to understand why things are so different.

In society's eyes, men's value is their ability to provide. Yes, he might bullied for his size, but if he can provide in other ways, he gets a pass. Being fat is a sin, so you better be useful to make up for this.

Contrast this with society's view for women. For us, our value is in being pretty and reproducing. It doesn't matter of we excell in other area. To society, if a woman is ugly, then she might as well drop dead.

There's a men's body positive movement. It's not hard to find it, but it doesn't get as much press as the female counterpart. This is because there's more shame directed at fat women than fat men.

I've seen some evil things said about fat people. However, there's a huge difference in how that hate is expressed. When a man or AMAB is fat, society wants them to hide themselves. When a woman or AFAB is fat, society wants them to die.