Hey guys,
I am after a little advice, please, but first the background:
My grandmother is in her 90s and has dementia. Some days are better than others, but she needs 24 hour care. The family take it in turns to stay with her so she can be in her own home as long as she can.
She also has carers who go in to help with meals etc.
On Monday and Wednesday, I stay with her for the day and the carer makes dinner for us both.
OK - Here is the relevant bit...
I noticed a few weeks ago that this carer (male) makes me large dinners. I didn't think a lot about it at first, but the meals have definitely been increasing in size over the last few weeks.
Last week, he actually gave me a full Aunt Bessie Roly Poly pudding (300g) in custard. This was in one sitting and the dessert has about 60g of sugar and 22g of fat.
Today, he really went for it and the dinner he made me was so large it was on two plates. Turkey, lots of potatoes, 6 large buttered buns and salad. He also gave me weird "reverse psychology" encouragement saying thing like "If you can't manage it all, just leave what defeated you."
Afterwards, he asked if I wanted cake and ice cream, but I refused.
Now, I am not sure if he is a feeder or if he is thinking that this is some sort of crazy way that he proves he is doing his job. I don't want to ask him outright in case he is not a feeder and it opens a whole can of worms about my Grandmother's care.
I have spoken to some of you on messenger, and I have put a few other comments on the message board, but for those I have not spoken to before, let me clarify my position.
I would love to be an IRL feedee, fattened by a ruthless feeder, but I don't want to just "get fat" I want to be controlled.
So if this guy comes up to me and says he just likes to feed people, it probably would not interest me, but imagine this:
We are in the kitchen, he walks up to me, pokes my belly and says "I've put a lot of work into stretching this."
"What do you mean?" I ask
"I have been giving you increasingly large meals to see how much you could eat. Now I know, I am going to start fattening you up."
I would love that. He would take measurements every week and then give me the large meals. And instead of asking if I want cake and ice cream, he will just give me it and expect me to eat it. I would happily do that.
Does that make sense?
Anyway, the point of my post (finally!) is to ask if anybody could suggest a way I can approach this? Without getting welfare or social services overly involved in my Grandmother's care.
Thanks.
I am after a little advice, please, but first the background:
My grandmother is in her 90s and has dementia. Some days are better than others, but she needs 24 hour care. The family take it in turns to stay with her so she can be in her own home as long as she can.
She also has carers who go in to help with meals etc.
On Monday and Wednesday, I stay with her for the day and the carer makes dinner for us both.
OK - Here is the relevant bit...
I noticed a few weeks ago that this carer (male) makes me large dinners. I didn't think a lot about it at first, but the meals have definitely been increasing in size over the last few weeks.
Last week, he actually gave me a full Aunt Bessie Roly Poly pudding (300g) in custard. This was in one sitting and the dessert has about 60g of sugar and 22g of fat.
Today, he really went for it and the dinner he made me was so large it was on two plates. Turkey, lots of potatoes, 6 large buttered buns and salad. He also gave me weird "reverse psychology" encouragement saying thing like "If you can't manage it all, just leave what defeated you."
Afterwards, he asked if I wanted cake and ice cream, but I refused.
Now, I am not sure if he is a feeder or if he is thinking that this is some sort of crazy way that he proves he is doing his job. I don't want to ask him outright in case he is not a feeder and it opens a whole can of worms about my Grandmother's care.
I have spoken to some of you on messenger, and I have put a few other comments on the message board, but for those I have not spoken to before, let me clarify my position.
I would love to be an IRL feedee, fattened by a ruthless feeder, but I don't want to just "get fat" I want to be controlled.
So if this guy comes up to me and says he just likes to feed people, it probably would not interest me, but imagine this:
We are in the kitchen, he walks up to me, pokes my belly and says "I've put a lot of work into stretching this."
"What do you mean?" I ask
"I have been giving you increasingly large meals to see how much you could eat. Now I know, I am going to start fattening you up."
I would love that. He would take measurements every week and then give me the large meals. And instead of asking if I want cake and ice cream, he will just give me it and expect me to eat it. I would happily do that.
Does that make sense?
Anyway, the point of my post (finally!) is to ask if anybody could suggest a way I can approach this? Without getting welfare or social services overly involved in my Grandmother's care.
Thanks.
3 months