Lifestyle tips

I guess the title is kinda misleading but I didn't know how to word it. Basically, in recent weeks I've been thinking a lot about my size and if I want to actively get bigger. The big issues is regarding family/friends. I don't know how they'd react to me getting bigger and, even if this is an extreme, I don't want to feel/be alone if they all think I'm weird for being into this stuff. I've always been self conscious in that regard.

Then there's the issue of feeling comfortable gaining in a college setting. It's not as big but I am always self conscious about the roommate I'm unfortunately stuck with (I tried to get a single room but no luck) and my social anxiety is always acting up in classes, especially those desk that have chair and desk connected.

And another thing that's been on my mind is a partner. I'm not saying Feeder/ Gainer partner specifically but rather a partner in general. I'm worried I'll never find love or something I can feel comfortable around with this stuff. Yeah there's this community here and such but it's still finding a partner I can click with and be myself without their judgement. I like someone who's accepting and/or understanding and doesn't judge me for this interest even if they aren't into it.

Tl;Dr I worry about family and friends reactions, college life, and potential relationships.

I guess I just want advice on these issues from others if possible.

All valid points but I always say you only live once so make it what you want. If it's the most important. Thing out there to You then go for it.
If not work on accomplishing what most. Important first then round back.

i think a lot of what you've expressed is pretty universal. a lot of those concerns are shared by all kinds of people at your stage of life. so know that you're not alone in how you are feeling and the things that are worrying you. when i was your age, even though i was fit and athletic, i still had a lot of the same concerns about what i wanted to do, and what the impacts of choosing a path would be.

i can't tell you what the right path is for you - but i can give you whatever passes for the wisdom of an old guy who has lived thru it... in looking back, i can say that none of those concerns really mattered in the long haul. do the things that will bring you joy, and know that the people who really care about you just want you to be happy. they may have concerns about health and well-being, and they may not understand or agree, but they will adjust if they see that you are happy.

my only regrets are when, looking back, i didn't treat people with the degree of empathy i should have. maybe some of those lessons have to be learned the hard way? but i don't regret the years i spent in the gym being fit, nor do i regret the decision to stop exercising and getting fat. it's all been a wonderful experience, and i feel like i've been given the chance to live several different lives in one lifetime!

best of luck to you at school, and remember not to be too hard on yourself!