General

Nate Loves His BBW Wife:
My wife doesn't like her body, and wants to lose weight with one of those new drugs. She's ~315 now and hasn't been under 260 since we started seeing each 15 years ago. It breaks my heart to see her have such distain for her body and I want her to be happy, but I feel so conflicted because I absolutely love her size.

Is there a place here to talk this through with people that really understand what I'm feeling, maybe have gone through the same thing.

I really don't have anyone to talk to that understands my side of this, so thanks in advance to anyone who reaches out.

Nate Loves His BBW Wife:
My wife doesn't like her body, and wants to lose weight with one of those new drugs. She's ~315 now and hasn't been under 260 since we started seeing each 15 years ago. It breaks my heart to see her have such distain for her body and I want her to be happy, but I feel so conflicted because I absolutely love her size.

Is there a place here to talk this through with people that really understand what I'm feeling, maybe have gone through the same thing.

I really don't have anyone to talk to that understands my side of this, so thanks in advance to anyone who reaches out.

Munchies:
There is such a place. It's called therapy.

Nate Loves His BBW Wife:
My wife doesn't like her body, and wants to lose weight with one of those new drugs. She's ~315 now and hasn't been under 260 since we started seeing each 15 years ago. It breaks my heart to see her have such distain for her body and I want her to be happy, but I feel so conflicted because I absolutely love her size.

Is there a place here to talk this through with people that really understand what I'm feeling, maybe have gone through the same thing.

I really don't have anyone to talk to that understands my side of this, so thanks in advance to anyone who reaches out.

Munchies:
There is such a place. It's called therapy.

Milhause:
I don’t know how this was intended, but there are a variety of reasons why “just go to therapy” isn’t always a viable option, whether for financial or geographical reasons. I myself live in a mental health care desert where the nearest providers are hours away and cost prohibitive.

OP, I’m not a counselor but if you need someone to vent to, feel free to message me.

Nate Loves His BBW Wife:
My wife doesn't like her body, and wants to lose weight with one of those new drugs. She's ~315 now and hasn't been under 260 since we started seeing each 15 years ago. It breaks my heart to see her have such distain for her body and I want her to be happy, but I feel so conflicted because I absolutely love her size.

Is there a place here to talk this through with people that really understand what I'm feeling, maybe have gone through the same thing.

I really don't have anyone to talk to that understands my side of this, so thanks in advance to anyone who reaches out.

Munchies:
There is such a place. It's called therapy.

Milhause:
I don’t know how this was intended, but there are a variety of reasons why “just go to therapy” isn’t always a viable option, whether for financial or geographical reasons. I myself live in a mental health care desert where the nearest providers are hours away and cost prohibitive.

OP, I’m not a counselor but if you need someone to vent to, feel free to message me.

Munchies:
I take your point.

But OP needs some heavy duty therapy that is above all of our pay grades. There are layers and layers of things that need to be untangled and addressed.

PolyPinoyPuppy:
I'll note that many practices provide teletherapy, and in my experience that's more convenient anyway. But I digress.

OP, your wife's disdain for her body is something you can only help with by accepting her choices over the matter.

I understand the conflicted feeling you express. But every person has their own reasons for wanting to gain or lose weight. My partner is accepting of my kink and we enjoy it in what ways we can, but health issues make losing weight the better option long term. Their weight loss hasn't impacted our relationship negatively, and if anything it's something to bond and cheer them on about.

I'd suggest thinking hard about whether you really would be that devastated if your wife lost weight or if this emotion is just a run-of-the-mill aversion to change. If I had to guess, you'll both end up just fine.

Nate Loves His BBW Wife:
My wife doesn't like her body, and wants to lose weight with one of those new drugs. She's ~315 now and hasn't been under 260 since we started seeing each 15 years ago. It breaks my heart to see her have such distain for her body and I want her to be happy, but I feel so conflicted because I absolutely love her size.

Is there a place here to talk this through with people that really understand what I'm feeling, maybe have gone through the same thing.

I really don't have anyone to talk to that understands my side of this, so thanks in advance to anyone who reaches out.

Munchies:
There is such a place. It's called therapy.

Milhause:
I don’t know how this was intended, but there are a variety of reasons why “just go to therapy” isn’t always a viable option, whether for financial or geographical reasons. I myself live in a mental health care desert where the nearest providers are hours away and cost prohibitive.

OP, I’m not a counselor but if you need someone to vent to, feel free to message me.

PolyPinoyPuppy:
I'll note that many practices provide teletherapy, and in my experience that's more convenient anyway. But I digress.

OP, your wife's disdain for her body is something you can only help with by accepting her choices over the matter.

I understand the conflicted feeling you express. But every person has their own reasons for wanting to gain or lose weight. My partner is accepting of my kink and we enjoy it in what ways we can, but health issues make losing weight the better option long term. Their weight loss hasn't impacted our relationship negatively, and if anything it's something to bond and cheer them on about.

I'd suggest thinking hard about whether you really would be that devastated if your wife lost weight or if this emotion is just a run-of-the-mill aversion to change. If I had to guess, you'll both end up just fine.

Nate Loves His BBW Wife:
I keep forgetting no one has probably read my other post. I cover that. Out of time now, back to this later.

---Edit: copied from other post---

I'm going through something that's kind of similar if you squint. My wife of nearly 10 years (together 15) is going to start one of those new weight loss drugs this month. I am being supportive of her decision and have meal plans and options ready for her. I've listened to her goals and done research into what targets should be set/hit to get her there. I not leaving her over this, regardless of how this turns out.

That said, I do have my own feelings about this, and thankfully I was already in therapy long before this decision was made.

We never had a feeder/feedee arrangement, but rather a dynamic that served her inclination to eat and my desire to make sure she had food and see her eat it. She'd ask for a large MCD's order and I'd skip out the front door with a huge smile to get it. I'd bring home a tub of peanut butter cups that she'd asked for and watch her binge almost the whole tub. Everybody happy.

Problem was we had never talked about it or how we felt while we were engaged in this dynamic. She seemed to enjoy eating whatever I'd brought so I didn't see the guilt and shame she felt. She saw me as a dutiful husband running errands for her, never imagining I could be feeling excited and aroused to pick up lunch.

Sorry for so much typing, but I'm here for support too. I can tell this stuff to my therapist but I think it will be different talking with people who really get it.

PolyPinoyPuppy:
I'll note that many practices provide teletherapy, and in my experience that's more convenient anyway. But I digress.

OP, your wife's disdain for her body is something you can only help with by accepting her choices over the matter.

I understand the conflicted feeling you express. But every person has their own reasons for wanting to gain or lose weight. My partner is accepting of my kink and we enjoy it in what ways we can, but health issues make losing weight the better option long term. Their weight loss hasn't impacted our relationship negatively, and if anything it's something to bond and cheer them on about.

I'd suggest thinking hard about whether you really would be that devastated if your wife lost weight or if this emotion is just a run-of-the-mill aversion to change. If I had to guess, you'll both end up just fine.

Nate Loves His BBW Wife:
I keep forgetting no one has probably read my other post. I cover that. Out of time now, back to this later.

---Edit: copied from other post---

I'm going through something that's kind of similar if you squint. My wife of nearly 10 years (together 15) is going to start one of those new weight loss drugs this month. I am being supportive of her decision and have meal plans and options ready for her. I've listened to her goals and done research into what targets should be set/hit to get her there. I not leaving her over this, regardless of how this turns out.

That said, I do have my own feelings about this, and thankfully I was already in therapy long before this decision was made.

We never had a feeder/feedee arrangement, but rather a dynamic that served her inclination to eat and my desire to make sure she had food and see her eat it. She'd ask for a large MCD's order and I'd skip out the front door with a huge smile to get it. I'd bring home a tub of peanut butter cups that she'd asked for and watch her binge almost the whole tub. Everybody happy.

Problem was we had never talked about it or how we felt while we were engaged in this dynamic. She seemed to enjoy eating whatever I'd brought so I didn't see the guilt and shame she felt. She saw me as a dutiful husband running errands for her, never imagining I could be feeling excited and aroused to pick up lunch.

Sorry for so much typing, but I'm here for support too. I can tell this stuff to my therapist but I think it will be different talking with people who really get it.

Munchies:
And this is where things went wrong. You and your wife are not communicating. You can ask for tips on how to do that, but until you two have an open, honest adult convo you are screwed.