I will give my story.
When I was younger I started padding. I remember distinctly as a small child doing it and thinking it was funny. Well as I got older I didn't do it as much, but when I hit puberty, I made an odd discovery that when I put my blanket under my shirt to look fatter I "enjoyed it" and thus began my padding journey. I would shove all manners of pillows, blankets, anything under my clothes, to portray giant sizes. I would even rip some of my clothes from time to time.
But there was something going on below the surface, I was in fact getting bigger. I was never an active gainer, never even considered gaining. I mean sure I liked weight gain, obviously. But I never once thought of say, overeating on purpose to gain weight. But I suppose the subconscious really is powerful because I started growing. Now, keep in mind, I would still occasionally pad myself, funny enough but never put the two together. Clothes I used to pad would no longer fit a few months later but for real. I think by 9th grade I was pushing past 200 lbs and it didn't stop. I remember in hindsight I was eating massive amounts and gaming all night. Giant steak and cheese subs, entire bags of doritos, huge bottles of pop. I just kept getting fatter.
College didn't help, there wasn't a lot of time between working and going to school at the same time. I would go to Taco Bell and eat like 10 different items and not even bat an eye, I used to think it was normal. The padding stopped some time ago, but the gaining continued pace.
One day, about 2 years after graduation, I went to the doctor and stood on a scale for the first time in years. I won't forget it, it said 308 lbs. I was legit shocked, the doctors didn't even seem to chide me for it.
I decided I would get in shape during the pandemic, I started losing weight, a lot of weight. And I was quite successful, then after losing about 100 lbs it is almost like it came back. Like my brain was like "Hey now, remember, you used to be big, wasn't that cool?" It all started flooding back and I became reawakened to this whole thing, the padding, weight gain, all of it, like unlocking some repressed core. I felt, lament! I was sort of shocked, I was lamenting at my weight loss, I was huge, and I didn't even know it! Imagine if I was that huge again!
Well one day I discovered feederism and here I am. Sort of in limbo between half my brain saying "you should probably try to build a relationship" and the other saying "bro imagine if you were 800 lbs that would be so awesome" and now I am trying to find someone I can build a relationship with, and they also want me to be huge.
8 months