Lifestyle tips

I am starting to shy away from feedism and kinks in general and I don't know what else to do.

It's like... Maybe sexual acts or identity is something I am very green on. But no matter how much I try, I just can't see explicit stuff without feeling repulsed. And that's especially a problem when someone is just being themselves and showing how proud they are from being in their own body, or the body they want for themselves.

I just can't help to run away to avoid being insulting, but I think its being interpreted as a rejection or an offense. Which is far from what I mean. I just can't handle nudity and sexual topics. I feel repulsed by these things, while for others is a part of pride and respect.

Sorry for the downer post, I just have a lot on my mind and I felt like expressing myself a little. I don't have much interaction with these topics outside of this, after all.

I think its completely possible and valid to be a part of this community without interacting with the sexual part of it. To me gaining weight is just about changing my own body to be more comfortable to me and any sexual feelings about that is secondary. It's okay to not have those feelings at all. This experience is different to everyone.

I’m not sure how to answer this nor do I may not speak for what you are going through. But I can say that I can relate in some ways with my own struggles as well when it comes to having a fetish.

I do get bad days when I feel like this is the reason why I struggle with dating because I have deluded myself into this. But at the same time I can live in a relationship without having this fetish involved. Heck, I actually have in the past. And if I’m being honest I don’t really care for intense nudity and porn. I’m just all about the belly show and I can call it a day!

But in all seriousness, as much as I can have good days and bad ones. I don’t let it define me for who I am.

I also have had relationships in the past but I always had to break up because they wanted to be more intimate with me. Even after explaining that I'm asexual, and hate any act or nudity, my partner always seemed to be starving for their urges when we were alone.

That's part of the reason I vented in this topic, the other part is that it's not been easy to find people in a similar kink related mindset to talk with that understand that I have these limits.

So I have seen and spoke with a few asexual fat admirers here and in other social media. I don't know why but it made me feel a bit more confident. I don't know, maybe it's something about the validation or someone else that shares the same thoughts as I do.

On this subject though, I will say this. Since there's nothing else that I can identify myself sexually, I just veer harshly towards feedism and maybe because I am so socially anxious that making new connections online is complicated for me, that trying to open myself to other people about this and sharing it has been difficult.

So my "horny" spikes just consist of desire to eat and to rub my curves. I don't desire to pin/be pinned or nothing of the sort.

My tastes are just different. I just have to come to terms with that to eventually accept it as normal. Sure wish all the therapists I had gone trough, sexologists as well, would have also accepted what I feel and not treated it as a condition. Looking back, I bet they were just doing that to get to sell me pills.